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Edwin Davies: I'm impressed by this result, but only in the same way that I'm impressed when I read about a Ponzi scheme. It's not something I condone, but anyone who can fleece people out of so much money has done something impressive.

David Mumpower: I have said in this forum that I believe found footage horror titles are a good idea in theater. Projects such as Apollo 18 make me reconsider that philosophy. A movie maker has the entirety of science fiction and horror at their disposal with this idea yet the trailers for it readily identify there are no good ideas in the film. That's indescribably frustrating to me. How can 100 people work on such a fertile concept and come up with absolutely nothing engaging? It's demoralizing. As was the case with Skyline, this project cost little more than magic beans ($5 million) to make and its (lack of) quality reflects this yet a $15 million running take means it's a decent performer relative to cost. That too is demoralizing.

Why? No, really. WHY?

Kim Hollis: Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star offered one of the worst performances in box office history, garnering $1.415 million from 1,500 locations, a sub-$1,000 per venue average. It had roughly the same per-location average as The Smurfs, which is in its seventh weekend in theaters. Say something funny about Bucky Larson, thereby proving yourself to be funnier than the people who made Bucky Larson.

Bruce Hall: I hear that Adam Sandler and Nick Swardson are old friends. I can only assume that Nick owes Adam money. Years ago, Sandler said "Hey, don't worry about it. We're friends. You don't have to pay me back. I missed my rent because of you, and my phone got cut off so I missed an audition, but that's okay. We're friends. One day, if I can, I'll still cast you in a movie. As the lead."





But of course all these years, Sandler lay awake at night tossing and turning, desperately thinking about how to rain down a heaping helping of hot molten revenge on his hated enemy. It all came together in Bucky Larson, an horrific combination of Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star and an SNL parody of Boogie Nights. Nick thought his old pal was doing him a favor, when in reality Adam was using his power and fame to utterly destroy his old rival. Also caught up in the carnage were Christina Ricci, who once turned Sandler down for a date. And Don Johnson, who once insulted Opera Man.

This goes to show you that revenge doesn't pay. Everyone got hurt in this one. Nick, Christina, Sonny Crockett, and Sandler himself, who is one of three (?) credited writers on this unforgivable pile of dog vomit. Most of all, the whole planet was hurt by this. Every time a movie this unspeakable bad is released, a thousand kittens die.

And somewhere out there Philip Michael Thomas is, for the first time in his life, grateful to be Philip Michael Thomas.

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