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Previously on Survivor, the contestants were broken up into two tribes: the young people, and the people with no hope whatsoever. Of course, the person voted off last week came from the younger tribe, but Shannon’s elimination was a certainty from the first moment he opened his mouth (take a hint, NaOnka).

Also, Jimmy Johnson is there.

The big news last week is that Jill deciphered a clue for a hidden Immunity Idol, figured out the location and then let someone else find it. No, we don’t understand that, either. She even allows Marty to take most of the credit, allowing him to perceive himself as the alpha dog. Jill seems to want to be the king-maker rather than the king so that she can be perceived as a less aggressive player in comparison. It’s a passive way of throwing him under the bus.

What we’re really wondering is…are you gay?

As the La Flor tribe returns from Tribal Council, a few tribe members profess that they will follow Probst’s advice to become more unified. This makes NaOnka’s head bob. To her mind, her alliance has just won the game, with the remaining trio of Alina plus Na’s two sworn enemies of Jud (aka Fabio) and Kelly B. on the outs. From a gameplay perspective, she may be right. Thus far, we find ourselves wondering if the older tribe has any hope of making it to the merge with more than a couple of members. Ergo, the dominant La Flor alliance could feasibly make up the body of the jury. We generally don’t think it’s a good idea to extrapolate a month of behavior based on a week of results, but when we look at Dan, Holly, Jimmy Johnson and Yve, we do not see strong physical competitors. The challenges will have to be more and more imbalanced toward the side of wits if they are to survive.

All of this is irrelevant to the fact that NaOnka is the worst person in the world (after Shannon). After the show is over, we expect her to go back to luring children into her gingerbread house.

If you are wondering how many days it took Jimmy Johnson to go crazy, the answer is seven. He starts relating to the howler monkeys and tries to start communicating with them in their language. This might seem ridiculous, but we would point out that he’s had to do something similar with Jerry Jones in the past.

Jimmy Johnson isn’t the only crazy one, though. For some reason, Marty sees Jimmy Johnson as his only impediment to winning Survivor, and he’s fixated on the former football coach. He is truly agitated that a celebrity is on his tribe (perhaps because Marty thought he would be the only millionaire there), and is convinced that his tribemates have “glitter in their eyes” for Jimmy Johnson. Marty wants to be the only alpha dog, and in his view, he’s battling Jimmy Johnson for that spot.

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