Survivor Recap

The Dragon Slayer

By David Mumpower

April 10, 2009

Anybody got a saw?

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"I get excited when I hear anything that starts with an F." -- Taj. Hey, Sister With Voice, "Fahrvergnügen!"...apologies to those of you who have never seen Love Potion #9, which is probably everyone outside of Sandra Bullock's immediate family.

The merger segment is more awkward than normal. First, Coach attempts to let all of the alpha males on the other team know that he's a soccer coach as well as a maestro (his word, not mine). Then, an attempt is made to move the conversation in the direction of the new name of the tribe. Someone suggests something that closed captioning thinks is "Dingus". It's shot down for obvious reasons. Eventually, they all settle upon Forza, which means strength in Portuguese. I presume that whomever suggested this is a Sports Night fan (La Forza del Destino!) and I love them for it. Unfortunately, I can't really tell who it was. Before I can figure it out, Sierra attacks the elephant in the living room and tries to make luggage and shoes out of it by asking what in the blue hell Jalapao was thinking with their last two Tribal Council votes. This is...not well received. Poker faces come out and noncommittal grunts are exchanged as a means of conversation. What is readily apparent in all of this is that six members of one extinct tribe and four members of the other extinct tribe do not trust each other in the least. Any and all political maneuvering used in an attempt to gain information is pointless at this juncture.




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The new Forza tribe winds up at the former Timbira camp and let's just say that the old Jalapao folks are less than enthusiastic about their new surroundings. Imagine an American watching the first half of Slumdog Millionaire and you'll get the general idea. Perhaps still stinging from his recent falling out with Stephen over hidden secrets, J.T. forges a new relationship with Coach. The two southern gentlemen (despite Coach's professions to be from California) fish and chat about the game. J.T. startles The Maestro by stating he's heard Brendan is in complete control of the game. To say that this shocks and aggravates the soccer coach would be an understatement. He immediately seeks to unearth whose opinion this is, presumably so that he can later assail them for their novice's take on tribal status. He's the leader, dammit! Why don't people realize this? Did they not see him in the water at the start of the episode? Did they not hear "You're the best around, nothing's ever gonna keep you down" playing as he crane kicked that blond-haired kid right in the face while Elisabeth Shue and that dude from Happy Days watched?

J.T. runs circles around Coach during this conversation. First, he states that Brendan has the idol. When Coach asks if Taj does and requests a promise from the good ol' boy on the subject, J.T. lies without blinking. It never even occurs to Coach that this may be the case. He is confident in his read in the boy, which could wind up being his downfall. The editing team has a bit of fun at Coach's expense at this point, showing a clip of him making vague yet ominous threats about what will happen to the people who lie to him during the course of this game. Just to be safe, the other contestants should probably hide the machetes while he's around. Everyone remembers that one incident with crazy Matthew a few seasons ago.


Continued:       1       2       3       4       5

     


 
 

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