Trailer Hitch
By Jim Van Nest
May 26, 2006
BoxOfficeProphets.com

I *said* noinch, noinch, Schmokin Weed, Doin' Coke, Drinkin' Beers...

Welcome to Trailer Hitch, BOP's look at the latest movie trailers to hit the Internet. Included this week are a couple of sequels, one that no one asked for and another that has been talked about for years. Keanu romances Sandy Bullock and Oliver Stone takes on one of the most challenging subjects in recent history, 9/11. These are just a few of the clips I'll be previewing this week in Trailer Hitch.

The Lake House – Opens June 16th

I'm still not exactly sure how there are people that see Keanu Reeves as a romantic lead, but I can't see him as anything other than Ted Theodore Logan. Okay, with that out of the way, I can get to trashing The Lake House. I watched the trailer and all I could think was, "I've seen this before." It didn't have the "twist" of the couple living two years apart, but it's the same story all the same. It's another in a long line of no-chance-they-could-ever-be-together chick flicks that will leave you flat at the end. Watching the trailer, I can't help but think one of our young lovers will die before they could ever meet. Sandy Bullock plays the female lead in this one, and I'm assuming they're hoping she and Ted, er, Keanu can recapture their Speed chemistry and make this one work. Maybe it's the manly man inside of me talking, but I can't see this as anything other than an unfulfilling romantic tearjerker that I'll likely be forced to go see.

Garfield 2: A Tale of Two Kitties – Opens June 16th

Memo to Jennifer Love Hewitt: Having a hit TV show is enough to get you good scripts. You don't have to do sequels to crappy kids' flicks. Okay, with that out of the way, we can talk about Garfield 2. It seems that the fat cat is headed to London. And wouldn't ya know it, when he gets there; he gets mistaken for the cat who would be king. With a royal snob cat living at Garfield's place, and Garfield living in the palace, it's only a matter of time before the craziness begins. I'm sure this will appeal to the kids who liked Garfield, but I can't imagine there's anyone else interested. The scariest thing of all is that Bill Murray is back as the voice of Garfield. Why, Bill, why?

Clerks 2 – Opens July 21st

He's been talking about it for years, and finally, Kevin Smith is back with the continuing story of Dante and Randal, the two slackers made famous in Smith's low budget indie hit Clerks. It seems that all these years later, Randal and Dante are now working together at the quickie mart, until the unthinkable happens, the mart burns down. Our heroes are forced to work at Mooby's. That's right...the same Mooby's that has been featured in several of Smith's flicks. The entire Smith posse is back for this one, including Jason Mewes, Bryan O'Halloran, Jeff Anderson, Jason Lee and Jennifer Schwalbach-Smith. From this trailer, we can definitely see that not much has changed in this little corner of Jersey, other than the Clerks are in color this time around. Lord of the Rings vs Star Wars, Lucas vs Jackson and several other conversations not fit for a family site such as this appear to be included. For fans of the Smith universe, Clerks 2 is an obvious must-see.

World Trade Center – Opens August 9th

We could go on for days about whether a film of 9/11 should be made. And even longer on whether it's "too soon" for such a film. We could also discuss whether or not Oliver Stone, with his history of conspiracy theories, should be at the helm. But I'm not here to do that. I want to talk trailer. And I have to say, the trailer shows some promise. Nic Cage is one of the most "hit and miss" actors I've ever seen. I mean, how could he be so brilliant in Leaving Las Vegas and then actually utter the line, "Put the bunny in the box"? In the trailer, Nic shows some promise as a New York police sergeant in charge of evacuating the crumbling Twin Towers. If the preview is anything to go by, the movie seems as though it will tell the story from the point of view of a couple of NYC cops and will treat the subject with the care it deserves. I'm a little surprised to be saying that I think this looks like it might be a pretty good flick, but I have to say the trailer does its job. What will really be interesting to watch is how the general public views the film and whether or not they'll show up in the theaters on August 9th.

Flushed Away – Opens November 3rd

You didn't actually think BOP would pass on the new Aardman flick, did you? It seems he's put the clay away and brought his crazy stories to computer animation, with the help of DreamWorks. Flushed Away is the story of Roddy, an upper-class mouse whose rich family goes on vacation, leaving Roddy to go wild. When a filthy sewer rat blasts up though the kitchen sink, our hero's life will never be the same. Roddy ends up being flushed down the toilet ending up in Ratropolis, where he hooks up with a host of crazy characters including an enterprising female mouse, a villainous toad and his even more dreadful French cousin, Le Frog. There's plenty of voice talent with names like Hugh Jackman, Kate Winslet, Sir Ian McKellan and Andy Serkis. With the trademark Aardman look and humor, Flushed Away looks to be another in a long line of hilarious stories and will be a force to be reckoned with this holiday season.

Ghost Rider – Opens February 16th, 2007

Apparently, this is Nicolas Cage week on Trailer Hitch, because my next offering is the long awaited Ghost Rider adaptation. This is really more of a teaser than trailer, but the message comes across quite well. We learn of Johnny Blaze's deal with the devil and the curse he is forced to live with. One of the main concerns coming into this is what will Ghost Rider actually look like, and I have to say, he looks pretty darn cool. The effects seem to be top notch here, not too much unlike the Pirates of the Caribbean, except with fire. With justice and vengeance as his motivation, the teaser seems to have a feel I haven't really seen since the original Crow. Amazingly, it looks like Nic might be two for two this week as I really liked what I saw of Ghost Rider and World Trade Center.