5 Ways to Prep: Jigsaw
By George Rose
October 26, 2017
BoxOfficeProphets.com
In one hand I want Madea dead and in the other, her death means the platform she shakes her fat suit on is also collapsing by the day. This weekend isn’t much different. Like Boo 2, Jigsaw sees the desperate return of another classic Halloween wannabe begging for scraps. The Saw series dominated the 2000’s with a seven-film run that had all but one make decent money. Long gone are the days of torture porn ruling the most haunted of holidays. Now, it’s 2017 and we are bringing every brand possible back to life. What helped Stephen King’s It back in September was a 27 year gap between updates whereas the last Saw was seven years ago.
There is a lot working against the release of Jigsaw. The biggest problem of the series is that Jigsaw technically died in the third film. It was his legacy that lived on from films four through seven. The first film featured a psychopath that took justice into his own hands by torturing victims into learning from their crimes. If they paid the price by inflicting pain on themselves and solved Jigsaw’s puzzles, they might live. Those that resisted stabbing their eyes out to reveal a hidden key would die. Wash the blood, rinse, repeat.
The second film kicked things up a notch in a haunted house of sorts, the third film ended the trilogy with Jigsaw’s death, the fourth film saw his legacy live on, the fifth film was an extension of the fourth, nobody remembers the sixth film because we all saw Paranormal Activity instead, and the seventh film had a small bump in revenue by adding 3D to the equation. The franchise has technically already revived itself twice, with the fourth film’s legacy plotline and the seventh film’s addition of 3D. I don’t know why Jigsaw’s producers bothered coming up with a name that suggests anything new is about to happen since commercials indicate this is another sequel.
I may not know what to expect from Jigsaw but I do have a few ways to help you possibly enjoy the experience better. As much as I want to trash Hollywood’s endless attempt to milk money from dying brands, I don’t want to see the big screen experience die. So here, my friends, are a few ways to help you prep for the latest franchise to rise from the grave… AGAIN.
Way to Prep #1: Saw (2004)
Since the films got less and less relevant after the fourth film, the last film in the series may not have a whole lot to do with this latest feature. If this is not a true sequel and is more of a relaunch, than the film you’ll most likely want to see from the franchise before seeing Jigsaw is the one that started this whole torture porn mess in the first place. You already know from the commercials that the original Jigsaw is dead, so watching his death in Saw III isn’t going to enhance your experience. Your best bet is learning as much about Jigsaw’s origin as possible.
Jigsaw started as a man dying of cancer who felt that the people of the world did not appreciate their lives enough so, naturally, he began to torture them. By doing this they would learn to seek forgiveness for their sins and could fully appreciate life. As the first film in the series, Saw had the smallest budget and, as such, had the most simple death traps. This made them the most realistic which, in turn, made them the scariest. I still get nauseous when I see the pit of pig guts in Saw III but nothing compares to the chill sent through my spine while watching a fat man crawl through a field of barbed wire in the original. Somehow Saw proved less is definitely more and is the highlight in the otherwise overbearing sub-genre of horror known as torture porn.
Way to Prep #2: Hostel (2006)
This garbage is the direct result of Saw’s success. You see, what happened was that after Saw came out people starting referring to it as “torture porn” instead of “clever yet gruesome ways to murder people.” This meant that the success it had was chalked up to audience appreciation for blood and guts instead of elaborate death traps. The problem with this is that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, and if people think you are successful for being gory than that’s what they’ll try to imitate. That’s where Hostel came in and took things to a much lower level.
The morality of “torturing people to save them” was replaced with “torturing people for pleasure.” I mean this quite literally. There is no individual killer in Hostel, no person to blame for these brutal murders or reason for them to wrap your head around. There are simply rich people of the world that will pay large sums of money to live out their most vile, twisted fantasies. This might be bearable if the deaths were even remotely creative. Instead, what we have is a detailed visual of what happens when a human eye is burst open. It isn’t scary, it’s just plain disgusting. Though you are likely to hate every minute of watching Hostel, it will definitely help set the bar of what you consider torture porn and that might help you appreciate whatever fraction of a story Jigsaw attempts this time around. It’s more than anything Hostel has to offer.
Way to Prep #3: Scream 4 (2011)
Reboots and relaunches are par for the course these days. Franchises aren’t the only thing getting the upgrade, though. Every few years a new genre emerges. In the 1980’s the slasher film was born. In the 1990’s, it was upgraded with wittier teenages and a touch of humor with the blockbuster release of Scream. Then slashers got so big and boring the only way to top them was to birth the torture porn genre. What happened when audiences became tired of torture? They brought back the slashers, with Halloween and Friday the 13th and Freddy Krueger all getting official relaunches by starting again from the scratch with the origin story. And just when the slasher genre got tired and Scream was there to liven things up, they were there again when the reboot sub-genre was burned out. The problem here is that reboots make sense for movies made prior to 1990’s computer technology. Enhanced graphics and visuals are a way to share old stories with new generations. Movies made in 2004 don’t need reboots.
Scream 3 and Scream 4 were released 11 years apart. Though the point of the film is to feature a much younger cast in addition to the old crew (thus creating a “next generation” vibe) the decade-long gap between releases wasn’t really enough. The title was also misleading. It should have mentioned a new generation, or been called Screamers or Screaming or something. It wasn’t a true sequel and felt like a relaunch, but the gap wasn’t long enough for a reboot. Jigsaw IS a sequel as the commercials indicate but the title suggests something new. Regardless, it’s only been seven years. The real irony here is that Scream 4 is a great movie but still failed at the box office. People need to miss the old days to go back and visit them.
Way to Prep #4: The Final Destination (2009)
We all know the premise of the Final Destination movies. A group of people avoid being part of a mass death (plane crash, car crash, etc.) but die later when Death itself finds them, often creating elaborate and amazing domino-effect murder schemes. The series began in 2000 (after Scream made witty teens cool again) and had two successful sequels. To kick things up a notch and take advantage of the new 3D technology, the fourth film added the extra dimension and did a play on the original title. It wasn’t a reboot but the 3D technology and title change helped it feel new. Saw already added 3D and they already rebooted the core concept of the franchise with the legacy business. Though The Final Destination was the biggest hit of the bunch, the fifth film was the lowest earner and ended the series. With the Saw series already having used up it’s “Free 3D Hit Pass”, the franchise is relying entirely on a new title to make an entire franchise seem worthwhile again. The difference is the Final Destination movies were always a ton of fun in addition to be creative with death, where as Saw is just… torture porn.
Way to Prep #5: Halloween: H20 (1998)
One thing you have to admire about the original slashers of the genre was their ability to constantly update and enhance the mythology within the series. Each film was a either sequel, reboot, relaunch, mash-up, or anything in-between. Heck, in the Friday the 13th series Jason doesn’t even take over as the killer until Part 2. When it comes to Michael Meyers, the true shakeup of the bunch was part three, Season of the Witch. It has nothing to do with anything related to the franchise, other than a complete misuse of the title. Though confusing, this bastard third part in the series made it easy for a fourth part to seem like a relaunch with the Return of Michael Meyers. Every few years Michael returns bigger and better than ever.
The effects of the Scream franchise were far and wide. After horror became cool again in 1996, Michael Meyers took note and decided to reboot again in 1998 with witty teen actors that were famous for being on TV (Dawson’s Creek star Michelle Williams to name one) and something far more terrifying… the return of the original scream queen, Jamie Lee Curtis. She was only ever in the first two parts of the series, part three was Meyers-less, and part four picked up with Jamie’s on-screen daughter. H20 was the seventh film in the series but capitalized on the return of the series star, 20 years of history and being freaking awesome. Jigsaw is only banking on a new title. Here’s hoping a lackluster October helps it scare up a few dollars at the box office.