This Weekend, Watch This
A comparison for the new releases for April 3-5, 2015
By Curt David
April 2, 2015
BoxOfficeProphets.com

Michelle Rodriguez is double dipping!
New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? I’ll save you the hassle of researching every movie by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I’ll tell you which movie you should watch in the theaters.

For Easter weekend, the only new movie in wide release is Furious 7. Since I have no movie to compare it with, I’m going to make up a movie based on the popular toy Matchbox cars.



Furious 7MatchboxWINNER
(1 point per category)
CLEAREST TITLESounds like the seventh Fast and Furious movie!Sounds like the first ever Matchbox Cars movie!Point for Matchbox.
BEST GENRE & RATINGAction
Rated PG-13 for prolonged frenetic sequences of violence, action and mayhem, suggestive content and brief strong language		Action
Rated PG-13 for extra prolonged frenetic and manic sequences of violence, action, and mayhem, but not as much suggestive content because these films are being targeted to impressionable youth. 		Point for Matchbox. (Also, none of the good guys are shown smoking).
BEST PLOT (in haiku form) Bad guy wants revenge
Group survives by racing fast
Things blow up. Fast cars. 		Good guys want revenge
Drive thousand diff’rent car types
Merchandise tie-in!		Matchbox point.
BEST TRAILER PROS: More crazy car stunts. The seventh movie in a popular series.
CONS: None if you saw the sixth one and liked it. 		PROS: So many car stunts. First of what is sure to be a series. Hints at a Micro Machine spin-off movie.
CONS: Absolutely none. 		Matchbox point.
COOLEST LEAD ACTOR Paul Walker from Into the Blue, Eight Below, and these Furious movies.Curt David from the Box Office Prophets website. Paul Walker will win this point.
BEST CAST Vin Diesel, Jason Statham, Michelle Rodriguez, Ludacris, Dwayne Johnson, and Kurt Russell. Catherine Zeta-Jones, Jennifer Lawrence, Michelle Rodriguez, Freida Pinto, Taraji P. Henson, and Jennifer GarnerMatchbox’s star power will win this point.
BEST STREET CREDDirector James Wan directed Saw and some other horror movies. Co-directors Steven Spielberg and James Cameron have directed other things before. And the co-directors will win this point.


So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Furious 7 wins all of them, except for in this hypothetical scenario where Matchbox would win 6 of the 7 points.

You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you aren’t going to watch Furious 7 in theaters, feel free to wait for the release of Matchbox. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: On paper, Furious 7 is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: Each week I give a gold star to the movie with the best tagline. Furious 7’s “Vengeance Hits Home,” loses out to Matchbox’s “Explosions will give you Hot Wheels.”
Conclusion 3: Happy Easter!