This Weekend, Watch This
A comparison for the new releases for August 1-3, 2014
By Curt David
August 1, 2014
BoxOfficeProphets.com

Cheese!
New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? Some movies sound awesome (Crocodile Dundee in Los Angeles), but then do not do too well commercially. Other movies star your celebrity crush (Eva Longoria in The Sentinel), but then do not get much love critically. Still other movies are recommended by friends (but friends can be idiots). And if you are like 16%* of people, you are not even aware of which movies are being released, yet alone which movies you should pay your hard earned money on.

I’ll save you the hassle of researching every movie by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then I’ll tell you which movie you should watch in the theaters.

For the weekend of August 1st, new movies in wide release are Get On Up and Guardians of the Galaxy.



Get On Up Guardians of the GalaxyWINNER
(1 point per category)
Clearest TitleThe subtitle “The James Brown Story” helps clear things upThe word “Marvel” above the title helps us know it’s a superhero filmBoth titles are somewhat recognizable...1/2 point each.
Best Genre
and Rating		Musical Biopic
Rated PG-13 for sexual content, drug use, some strong language, and violent situations 		Sci-Fi Action
Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi violence and action, and for some language 		Very different genres, I like that...1/2 point each.
Best Plot
(in haiku form)		The James Brown Story
First poor, then super famous
Changed course of music 		Five mis-fit heroes
Become team, save galaxy
One’s talking racoon		Two good plots two. Okay, another 1/2 point each.
Best TrailerPROS: Looks like great acting, a great story, and fun music
CONS: None		PROS: Looks like an action packed superhero film with lots of funny dialogue
CONS: I never heard of these guys		Both were decent trailers, makes me want to rent the movie, but not rush to see either opening day...1/2 point each again.
Coolest Lead ActorChadwick Boseman was Jackie Robinson in 42. Chris Pratt from Everwood and Parks & Recreation.Two up and coming superstars. Another 1/2 point each.
Best CastDan Aykroyd (Ghostbusters), Craig Robinson (The Office), and Viola Davis and Octavia Spencer (The Help)Zoe Saldana (Avatar), the voices of Vin Diesel (Fast Five) and Bradley Cooper (Hangover), and Djimon Hounsou, John C. Reilly, Glenn Close, and Benicio Del Toro. Two strong casts, but I think Guardians are going to squeak out a full point.
Best Street Cred
For the Production		Director Tate Taylor also directed The Help. Writer and Director James Gunn also wrote and directed Slither. And both new, but awesome, directors...yep, 1/2 point each.


So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Guardians of the Galaxy scores 4 points and Get On Up scores 3 points and a gold star.

You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you want to see a James Brown biopic, feel free to watch Get On Up. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: On paper, Guardians of the Galaxy is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: Each week I give a gold star to the movie with the best tagline. Get On Up’s “The Funk don’t Quit” beats out Guardians’ “When things get bad, they’ll do their worst.”
Conclusion 3: Chadwick Boseman first brought Jackie Robinson to the screen, and now James Brown. This guy is good...I hope he goes places.

*Statistic is completely made up.