The Amazing Race 24: All-Stars - Episode 11
By Daron Aldridge
May 12, 2014
BoxOfficeProphets.com
The alliance co-dependent singers continue to hang on but look at my rankings for this week to see what I really think of their chances. For the Cliff’s Notes version, here they are:
David & Connor, Team Murphy's Law/father and son
Leo & Jamal, cousins/Afghanimals
Brendon & Rachel, Team Fetch/Big Brother
Jennifer & Caroline, singers
Let’s return to Spain and begin where we just ended. It's a bit after 11 a.m. and David & Connor leave in the pole position for this leg. Despite his assertion otherwise, David is not hindered by his age at all on this Race. He may try to play that card to garner sympathy or an edge but the results don't lie. Pop and son are the team to beat. The clue informs the teams that they are leaving Spain by train and then plane for Great Britain. That's quite the rhyme.
After landing in London, the teams will venture to Liverpool for what must be a Beatles-themed task, right? I mean it's the 50th anniversary of the Fab Four hitting the US. Well, it is but the teams are actually heading to the stadium home of Liverpool FC. See...because the rest of the world loves soccer way more than Americans do.
Team Murphy’s Law heads for the train station and in short order (meaning less than 30 minutes) the other three teams have left the mat as well. No travel drama or jockeying for better arrangements necessary because they are all on the same train and then plane. Clearly, the producers didn’t want to gamble on an airport snafu to suck the drama from the penultimate leg of its All-Star season.
Brendon & Rachel take this opportunity to acknowledge that they haven’t been putting their best Race foot forward the last couple of legs but Rachel is proud of her ability to control meltdowns this season. I commend her for keeping it in check but the previews for this episode paint a picture that it’s been a fleeting change.
All abroad the crazy train because with everyone together this should be a tight leg through England.
Upon landing in Heathrow, the teams scramble to find the parking lot for their marked cars. Driving on the left side of the road and car might prove problematic for the teams. In surely what was a "blonde" edit, Caroline is the only one shown trying to get in the wrong side for the driver’s seat.
Side note: As I am already experiencing some mid-90s temperatures down here in the south, it was a refreshing sight to spy Christmas trees decorating Heathrow. I suspect that the producers usually avoid showing images that point to when the season was filmed but O Tannenbaum snuck in there this time.
Despite it being nighttime, the teams don’t start arriving at Anfield Stadium until the sun is up. If you are like me, I didn’t realize that it was that long of a drive but according to the Interwebs, it’s about three hours or so from London to Liverpool. That’s plenty of time to get lost or at least, lose ground.
The first team to arrive is the Afghanimals and they are giddy. Earlier, I referenced that the rest of the world loves them some soccer. Well, Leo & Jamal prove it because they are beside themselves with excitement about being at Liverpool FC’s stadium. The challenge: Each team member must dress in soccer uniforms and score two penalty goals on a professional goalkeeper. This puts the cousins’ already high enthusiasm through the roof because they get to actually take the field.
The main drawback is Jamal’s tender knee which will very much hinder his kicking power. They bound into the dressing room and don their own personalized jerseys.
As expected, Jamal is having a difficult time kicking with enough strength and almost loses his balance a couple of times as he hobbles back to try again. This makes me worry that his injury is more than just a tweaked nerve or muscle. An uninjured Leo doesn’t seem to fare much better as kick after kick is scooped up by the goalie or goes wide.
The boys finally start to make progress, with Jamal scoring twice before his cousin. While elated to be playing on the field, it appears the guys haven’t actually kicked a ball in a while. Jennifer & Caroline show up in second and take the other side of the field. Of course, Caroline immediately asks the goalie to be nice and go easy on them.
While she unsuccessfully charms for leniency, Leo has hit both of his goals and the Afghanimals are their way to the next destination: the Pontcysyllte Aqueduct in Wales. As the cousins head out Team Fetch has arrived and lined up in front of the Afghanimals’ goalie.
At the other end of the field, the singers continue to get blocked and appear to have stalled out. When no one is able to help them, this is the result.
As Leo & Jamal roll out of the stadium, an arriving Team Murphy’s Law realizes that they are likely in last place, which is not a familiar feeling. Brendon shows the most proficiency in kicking the ball, which isn’t saying too much but he and Rachel don’t take too long on the task and pass up the still goal-less Jennifer & Caroline. Off to the aqueduct they go.
The girls’ goalie only has them for the entire challenge because David & Connor have also taken on the other goalie. The singers just needed a boost of confidence to find their sweet spot in this task and they get it when the goalkeeper pretty much gives them a free kick. I mean the dude didn’t even move at all to block this shot. That’s all they needed and the ladies knock out the next three.
If you thought that Connor, the young, fit cyclist, could breeze through this task, like I assumed, then you would be wrong just like me. Both members of Team Murphy’s Law struggle but the Sad Trombone Award for Overall Ineptness goes to Connor. He even admits that he doesn’t do well with using his feet. Ummm…Aren't you a cyclist? The last time I checked cyclists use their feet and legs pretty much the whole time while racing.
Regardless, the youngster gets shown up by dad, who scores his two goals before the boy gets one. The montage of missed goals from Connor finally concludes with his two successful shots. Even the judge/coach gives the young man a backhanded compliment of “Eventually, yeah?” But with the British accent, it probably comes across as less sarcastic sounding as it could’ve been.
Leo & Jamal are having a devil of a time finding this aqueduct in Wales and pull over at a gas station. As they harass customers for directions, Team Fetch pulls up and Brendon chooses to ask the attendant instead of random people. With directions in hand, the newlyweds drive off and the cousins hop in their car to follow. Mr. Big Brother isn’t too keen on Leo & Jamal just following them to the locations, so he loses them by exiting off the main road. And now the boys are lost and Brendon & Rachel are feeling pretty good.
In a semi-surprising turn, Jennifer & Caroline arrive first at the next destination but only seconds before Team Fetch. It’s time for a Roadblock. The team member has to take a 15 minute ride on a boat along this elevated waterway during which they will work with a dialect coach to learn an eight line poem in Welsh. If they correctly recite it, they get their clue. If not, they have to take another 15 minute ride before their second attempt.
Caroline takes the task for her team and Brendon does for his. They chug along the water and get a crash course in Welsh, which isn’t too far removed from Old English it seems. This is one task that on paper it could be easy but in reality, this could be a long afternoon of slaughtered poetry. In high school, it took me way more than 15 minutes to memorize the first 18 lines of Chaucer’s Canterbury Tales in Old English but I can still get through the first six lines 20 years later. So, the eliminated team will have that consolation prize.
Connor and Jamal arrive and board their boats and all the teams are getting schooled…Welsh-style. It’s near-impossible to convey how painfully awkward and awful each of them are as they deliver their lines. The most notable for all the wrong reasons is Jamal, who sounds like a man trying to hock up phlegm in slow motion.
Back at the starting point, it seems that all the ill will that infected the last couple legs because of the U-Turn has finally dissipated. David notes that while they wait, they ALL are just hanging out and joking around. This includes outcast Rachel. It’s nice to see that with the end of the Race in sight, the teams understand that there is nothing to be gained from directing so much hate toward one another. It doesn’t have to be a shiny, happy love fest but civility and sportsmanship should be the minimum effort. David has done some damage control in my eyes.
On their first tries, all of them get denied a clue from the linguist/judge and are lucky that this little old lady didn’t punch them in their throats for butchering her native tongue. Brendon makes the most of his subsequent practice sessions and gets his clue first with Caroline behind him in second.
Jamal is still trying to spit out the right words with so much forceful inflection that I am afraid that he’s going to burst a vein in this head. Connor is lighter in his speech and more graceful in delivery but keeps flubbing the words.
Brendon & Rachel are now heading to Bolesworth Estate for their next clue with a slight lead over the singers.
After several failures, Jamal has slogged his way through the Welsh poem and gotten his clue, which keeps Connor in last. It's not the best showing for the father/son duo, whom I have ranked as number one. As Jamal meets up with Leo and they head off, Jamal verbalizes his concern that this Roadblock could spell elimination for them just like the Roadblock last season with the "robot" construction did. But he is happy that David & Connor are behind them for now.
Connor catches a break and gets his clue. It’s pretty dang funny that for each of the people, the judge told them “Congratulations” in Welsh and it’s met with either a blank stare or awkward “ummm…thanks?!”
All the teams are traveling to the next estate but navigation woes besiege one team. The normally directionally adept Afghanimals head the wrong way, which nudges them to last.
Brendon & Rachel get to the clue first and it’s the Detour: Shoot It or Boot It. For Shoot, the teams have to use a 12-gauge shotgun to shoot 16 clay pigeons. For Boot, the teams have to select a pair of size 9 or size 11 Wellies (rubber boots). Then they must fill them with water and throw them around a course. Kinda like disc golf but more physically demanding. The course goes out and around a bale of hay and back to the start. Oh yeah, they have to all dress like Downton Abbey extras also.
Team Fetch goes for Boot and get changed. As they run to the task, the singers and David & Connor arrive. The girls opt for shoot because as they told us on their first season, Caroline is related to Daniel Boone, so she should be able to shoot a gun and Jennifer’s grandpa was John Wayne. Not sure if shooting a prop gun in a movie and thus being a "great shot" because your character is qualifies Jennifer for this task. Yet, here they are. David & Connor also go with Shoot because Eagle Scout Connor has a marksmanship badge. No, I am not being snarky; these were his exact words. Also, I am not really feeling good about putting a gun in the hands of Team Murphy’s Law but their bad luck seems to have subsided. This is not the task for it to return.
At Boot, Rachel grabs a pair of size 10 boots and they head to the starting line. Those of us at home are treated to the “oops they messed up” gong, so this could be devastating for the newlyweds, if Leo & Jamal show up anytime soon. They start slinging boots while the skeets start flying over at Shoot.
If it takes a big man to admit when he’s wrong, then I must be a giant because Jennifer & Caroline prove me wrong in a big way on this task. Despite displaying little to zero aptitude on challenges the previous ten legs and requiring or asking for help constantly, the girls actually showed up this time. The most dominant performance was at this Detour. Caroline, in particular, did not seem to miss a single shot and Jennifer held her own as well. Good job, ladies. I give you credit but wish that you would’ve show us this side earlier and more frequently. They finish up the Detour in first and are heading to Phil at Peckforton Castle. David & Connor finish up in second and get their clue.
The singers take a right turn out of the estate en route to the castle/Pitstop and David & Connor opt for a left. One of these made the right choice and will claim first. The other will not.
Before we get to that, how’s the Boot toss going? It would be going well... if Brendon & Rachel hadn’t flubbed the clue reading. They finish the task and the judge points out their mistake and Rachel devolves into a blithering mess…or more accurately, old Rachel. Histrionics flair up with tears, wailing and apologies galore. This brings angry Brendon back to the surface and he takes a tough love (minus the love) approach of yelling at her to focus and just move on. He’s pretty cold in this but coddling her probably wouldn’t help, either. They get the right boots and start again, just as Leo & Jamal arrive.
This is a glimmer of hope for the cousins, who are beaten down by their lost ways on this leg. Fighting through the tears, Rachel tries her best to do the challenge again.
Right or left? Which team made the correct pick? Well, we see Jennifer & Caroline get told to a turn around by a local, so we know the aerial shot of Phil at the mat will be followed by another first place finish by David & Connor. Five of 11 legs resulted in these guys winning. That’s why they are the team to beat. Despite their struggles this leg, they still dominated.
That puts the singers in second place and a place in the final three. So, while they proved themselves this leg more than ever before, I still think Jennifer & Caroline are possibly the least deserving team to make it to the finals. I just wish a team that actually raced for themselves was given another shot at the Amazing Race, like Chester & Ephraim from last season, who got eliminated because of airplane delays.
At the Detour, Team Fetch has recovered and finished Boot while the edit makes it seem as though Leo & Jamal are barely trailing them at Shoot. The reality is that an exhausted Brendon & Rachel, who just U-Turned themselves in essence by doing an entire Detour twice, hit the mat in third and round out the final three.
Leo & Jamal are once again stuck as Final Three bridesmaids on the outside looking into the last leg. When it came down to it, they just couldn’t make it happen but the cousins did rebound for me and were a highlight this season. For a pair that I dreaded seeing on this go-round, I am glad they were given another chance.
So with a final three of David & Connor, Jennifer & Caroline and Brendon & Rachel, the Amazing Race All-Stars heads to Las Vegas for the last leg. The previews give a glimpse at David Copperfield and skydiving to the finish line. I'm reminded of Nic Cage’s Honeymoon in Vegas with the Flying Elvises (Utah Chapter). Hey wait…David & Connor are from Utah. Is this foreshadowing?
We’ll find out next week.