This Weekend, Watch This
A comparison for the new releases for November 27 - December 1, 2013
By Curt David
November 28, 2013
BoxOfficeProphets.com
I’ll save you the hassle of researching every movie, by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then I’ll tell you which movie you should watch in the theaters.
For Thanksgiving weekend, the new films opening in wide release are Frozen, Black Nativity, Homefront, and The Book Thief. (Philomena also expands and the movie Oldboy opens in some theaters too).
| Frozen | Black Nativity | Homefront | The Book Thief | WINNER (1 point per category) | |
| Clearest Title | Sounds cold. | Sounds religious. | Sounds like the country’s at war. | Someone’s stealing books. | I don’t get these titles. So an unclear 1/4th point each. |
| Best Genre and Rating | Animation
Rated PG for some action and mild rude humor | Musical
Rated PG for thematic material, language and a menacing situation. | Action
Rated R for strong violence, pervasive language, drug content and brief sexuality. | Drama
Rated PG-13 for some violence and intense depiction of thematic material | OOOH, but very diverse movie genres! An ecstatic 1/4th point each. |
| Best Plot (in haiku form) | Princess runs away So land becomes snow covered We need to find her! | Girl has teenage son Sends him to his grandparents There’s lots of singing | Druglord kidnaps girl Father kicks @$$, gets her back That is the whole plot. | Nazi, Germany Family hiding a man Hopes not to get caught | Frozen and The Book Thief split the point for best plot. |
| Best Trailer | PROS: Several funny parts. Cute snowman. Kids will love it.
CONS: Not the clearest story in the world. | PROS: It’s festive. There’s lots of singing and soul, if you like that.
CONS: Not the most engaging plot in the world. | PROS: Famous actors. Some action.
CONS: Not the most unique plot in the world (nor did it make me care about the characters) | PROS: Dramatic, serious subject matter, based on popular book.
CONS: Technically none. | Once again, Frozen and The Book Thief will split the point for best trailer. |
| Coolest Lead Actor | The voice of Kristen Bell from Veronica Mars. | Jennifer Hudson from Dreamgirls. | Jason Statham from The Transporter and Crank. | Geoffrey Rush from the Pirate of the Caribbean movies. | Jenny does have an Oscar, but Geoffrey’s Oscar and three additional nominations will give him the point this week. |
| Best Cast | The voice of Idina Menzel (Enchanted) | Forest Whitaker (Last King of Scotland), Angela Bassett (Malcolm X), and Mary J. Blige (I can do Bad all by Myself). | James Franco (Spider-Man), Kate Bosworth (Superman Returns), and Winona Ryder (Edward Scissorhands) | Emily Watson (War Horse) | Black Nativity and Homefront will split the point for Best Cast. |
| Best Street Cred For the Production | Co-writer and director Chris Buck also directed Surf’s Up and Tarzan. | Writer and Director Kasi Lemmons also directed Talk to Me. | Writer Sylvester Stallone also wrote Rocky, Rambo, and The Expendables. | Director Brian Percival also directed six episodes of Downton Abbey. | Sylvester Stallone pretty easily wins the best street cred point. |
So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, The Book Thief scores 2 and 1/2 points (and a gold star), Homefront scores 2 points, Frozen scores 1 and 1/2 points, and Black Nativity scores 1 point.
You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you want to watch a feel-good family movie, feel free to watch this Frozen. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.
Conclusion 1: On paper, The Book Thief is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: Each week I give a gold star to the movie with the best tagline. The best tagline goes to The Book Thief’s “Courage beyond words.”
Conclusion 3: Idina Menzel. Her voice is like a hypnotizing plate of Thanksgiving food. (Total compliment!)
*Statistic is completely made up.