The Amazing Race 23: Episode 7
By Daron Aldridge
November 11, 2013
BoxOfficeProphets.com
1. Drs. Travis & Nicole
2. Baseball wives (self-labeled ‘Bunnies’) Nicky & Kim
3. Cab-stealing perpetrators Exes Tim & Marie
4. Cab-stealing victims New Englanders Jason & Amy
5. Afghanimals Leo & Jamal
6. "Ice" girls finish next-to-last Ally & Ashley
We are down to six teams and I posited in my rankings that this will be a non-elimination leg because we are due one for the season. If correct, then we are looking at a case of making no headway this week. Let’s press play on the DVR (because honestly, no one really watches TV "live" anymore).
After Phil gives us the Cliff’s Notes version of Vienna art history, Travis & Nicole rip into the clue and are off to Abu Dhabi. (Dear Millennials: Cliff’s Notes are essentially a print version of Wikipedia before there was a Wikipedia…you know…way back…10 years ago.)
The doctors seem to have settled nicely into their role of leaders in the Race and embraced the nickname the other teams have given them – Power Parents. While it’s cutesy and all, I question the fact that they would want to draw more attention to their standing. Granted, while it would be difficult to hide the dominance they have had, there’s really no value to adopting a boastful moniker, other than to add to their own hubris.
Regardless of my opinion, they are off to the airport to get tickets. Only a few minutes behind them are Nicky & Kim, who have enjoyed a pair of strong legs back-to-back, and the ladies are also en route to the airport. Once again, Leo & Jamal take a side trip to check the Internet for flights, instead of wasting such time sitting in a cab. The cousins see that there is a flight arriving at 5:50 a.m. the next morning and rush to the airport and that airline to secure tickets.
As the other teams leave the mat, Tim & Marie are still relishing in their taxi-snatching on the last leg and surprisingly, the New Englanders are looking at the long-game, which I feared they wouldn’t. Amy explains that they are still angry about the incident but they aren’t going to dwell on it. Jason simply says, “We’ll just beat them on the race itself.” Keep that focus, guys. Oh yeah, Ally & Ashley are still leaving at the back of the pack as usual and they know it.
The boys, who are the lone male-male team remaining, are the only ones to scout out flights prior to the airport and it has paid off. They are ticketed for the first flight and are the only ones with such good fortune. All the other teams are on a flight set to arrive just 10 minutes later but in this Race, any time lead you can muster is worthwhile.
No airline delays means that the Afghanimals are gleefully the first teams in “the mother country…sort of” as they call it and heading to the Sheikh Zayed Mosque for the next clue. As they travel to the mosque, the other plane also lands on time; this is going to be one fast and close leg.
The cousins are the first ones to the clue and directed to Irani Souk but they pass Jason & Amy who arrive next.
All the teams marvel at this truly, magnificent looking setting and, in accordance with the Muslim customs, the female racers have to cover their heads and remove their shoes before entering the mosque. Surprisingly, Marie minds her manners and doesn’t insult an entire populace, which is what I expected from her. Tim evens offers that he likes this more subdued Marie much more and requests the rest of the race be held on the grounds of the mosque. If only, Tim…if only. Every team is now heading to the next clue, which is the Detour.
The choices this week are Sort It Out or Sew It Up. For Sort It Out, the teams have to recreate an elaborately set up tray of dates, which includes various types of dates. The date supply from which the teams can choose are placed on a few marked tables around the area. For Sew It Up, they have to build a traditional wire fishing net that has a base of about five feet and a dome over the top.
After Leo & Jamal arrive first and pick Sort, the order of teams becomes a non-factor. They have all converged on the clue box. For some strange reason, Ally & Ashley seek the opinion of Tim & Marie about the task they are going with. This makes me think that the girls are a bit more co-dependent on the Race than I thought. I suspected it was just allegiance to the Afghanimals but, basically, asking the exes for approval on the task seems weak.
On the other hand, the same conversation between Jason & Amy and Travis & Nicole fits their Race relationship, since they have been working together for several legs now and had no secret of their alliance. This duo of duos is going to Sew. With Nicky & Kim also opting for Sort, the New Englanders and doctors will be the only ones sweating out the fishing net task in the sweltering 110 degree heat.
Over at Sort, the cousins are now joined by the others and, unbeknownst to them, they encounter their first mistake of the leg. Foolishly, Leo insists that the dates they need are only at this one spot at the market and doesn’t seem to bother looking for the any other tables. Jamal feels the dates aren’t correct according to the example but he doesn’t push the objection, which is surprising. They continue to work on the display, in vain.
Apparently, all the repressed oppressive behavior at the mosque has come to a head for Marie because not two minutes into the task, her yelling at Tim to hurry reaches an unholy volume. To his credit, he is finally no longer a shrinking violet when it comes to her behavior. When she begins to ask/demand for him to tell her what the order for the side he was memorizing, Tim shoots back, “I don’t know because you were yelling at me.” He stands his ground and doesn’t waver in his insistence that she needs to dial it down. He even resorts to the childish yet hilarious tactic of ignoring her demands and just commenting on how beautiful the skyline is. Later, after revisiting the example previously, Tim feels he knows how it should be arranged but Marie questions it and asks him to go look again. This prompts him to say, “I don’t need to because I know what you are doing is wrong.” While humorous to the viewer (at least *this* viewer), the other teams aren’t so amused.
All the yelling and bickering is taking a toll on the concentration of the other teams, who are now openly complaining about their fighting and telling them to calm down. The baseball wives even point out that it’s just embarrassing for them to act this way in front of the locals. For once, Ugly Americanism has been shown but directed at each other and not the locals, yet it’s still a shameful display.
Speaking of arguments, if you had to pick one team of the Sew ones to be snippy with one another, which would it be? Nope, it’s not Jason & Amy. The heat and tediousness of the task has claimed the normal composure of Travis.
First, he has to redo Nicole's work in the base of the net, which he points out as wrong a couple of times. She acknowledges that she messed it up, knows it and he doesn't need to keep bringing it up. Then, as the work progresses on the task, he draws attention to similar errors in the dome portion. There is even a fleeting conversation about using their Express Pass, which they wisely avoid doing. The good doctor is not really modeling the behavior that they were speaking of earlier when saying they knew their kids would be watching this and the example they were giving.
The other end of the dock and the team work scale are Jason & Amy. Knowing that working together on the same section would lead to trouble; the daters wisely divide and conquer the net. They are making much more impressive headway than the doctors.
Back at Sort, Nicky & Kim are engaged in a bit of covert maneuvering. They recognize that the limited supply of dates the others are using doesn't fit the example. Stealthily, the ladies spy the other tables and gather the dates while the opponents are focused on their tray. Leo & Jamal get rejected on their first attempt and notice the difference in the dates the MLB wives are using. The cousins make the pathetic offer of "We'll help you if you ever need it, if you show us where you got those dates from." Kim's great reply, "Sorry, we are in the middle of counting right now."
Nicky & Kim’s hesitance toward the Afghanimals finding out about the other trays is realized when the guys locate the dates and are their usual over-the-top selves. Within seconds, Ally & Ashley and Time & Marie are also hip to how to fix their rejected trays. Leo & Jamal have corrected theirs and are now headed to the marina, where a yacht will take teams to the Yas Island for the next clue. The yachts leave every 15 minutes, so the separating of teams is likely at this point.
Back at Sew, Jason & Amy have satisfactorily built their fishing net and are on their way to the yachts in second place. Not knowing where or how the other teams are faring, the pressure to finish pushes Travis & Nicole to get this Detour over with, which they do. Not knowing they are in third place, they rush to catch up to Jason & Amy.
Their rushing isn’t enough though to snag a place on the first yacht before it heads out to sea with only Leo & Jamal and Jason & Amy on board. While not in the very front, the doctors are securely in the middle.
By now, the Ice girls and the exes have left the Sort Detour and Nicky & Kim. Any advantage the date sneakiness may have garnered was for naught because the baseball wives have found themselves in last again. Thus, the roller coaster ride from them continues.
At the marina, Ally & Ashley and Tim & Marie arrive at the same time and anxiously await the chance to leave, in hopes they do so before Nicky & Kim show up.
At the Yas Island, it’s Roadblock time for teams. For this one, the person has to perform a 200-foot rappel from the top of a hotel to the ground. Then, they have to get in a Le Mans racecar that will drive the track at high speeds. During the lap, they have to read the signs on the track to find the name and time of the record holder for this track. After they correctly relay the driver’s name and time, they get their next clue.
Leo and Jason are up for their teams. Jason explains that before the Race, they agreed that Amy would handle all the tasks involving heights because of his fear. Yet, it seems that he has ended up facing all such tasks at this point. The rappelling is straightforward and both quickly get to the ground and loaded up in their cars.
On the other side of the water, Nicky & Kim have missed the boat with the exes and Ice girls by what they estimate is only 20 seconds. That is one bitter pill to swallow but there is nothing they can do now except to cool their heels on the dock for 15 minutes and watch their chances of a non-last place finish dwindle greatly.
The guys have made their first lap but they both whiff on their first guess and have to make another trip around the track. As they go again, Travis is gearing up for his hand at the Roadblock. On this second trip, both Leo and Jason spot the right driver’s name but Jason flubs the time. This is window of opportunity for the cousins to finally claim a first place spot. The clue points them to find Phil on the Champion’s Podium at the racetrack.
The Afghanimals run off and do indeed hit the mat in first place. It appears that the extra minutes they gained from the earlier flight paid off this time. Or maybe it was the extra prayer Jamal said he made at the mosque to allow them to get first place on this leg. Either way, the guys did well this leg but can they keep it up?
Jason corrects his mistake but knows that the elusive first place Pitstop for them will remain elusive. They trot up to Phil and take second again. It’s strange to see a team so defeated after performing so well and in second place. I say it again…they need to remain focused on the big first place finish at the end and not a mid-race first place.
Marie and Ally are now competing for their teams at the Roadblock and suited up for their rappel. On the track, Travis’s eagle eye makes this a "one-and-done" task for them. He is admittedly saddened because he really wanted to take another trip around the track. They hit the Pitstop in third and acknowledge that they are disappointed in how they performed that day. Nicole accepts the blame for the Detour errors but they take solace in the fact that they still have the Express Pass to use at the right time.
While Kim suits up for the rappelling, Marie and Ally are speeding around the track on another attempt following neither of them being correct the first time. The one I don’t want to finish first, of course, does indeed finish first. Marie has the clue and leaves Ally to be joined shortly by Kim.
The exes make their way to Phil and hit the mat in fourth place.
Battling for second-to-last are Kim and Ally. Both ladies are just swinging and missing on guess after guess after guess. It seems they have both employed the strategy of just memorizing one sign at a time, guessing that sign and then moving on to the next one until they get to the correct one.
Fittingly, for a team that is always the penultimate team at the Pitstops, Ally finally makes the correct stab in the dark and they get their clue. Without much drama, Phil checks the Ice girls in as team number five.
That puts the baseball wives squarely in last place. As they exhaustedly stand before Phil, Kim breaks down in tears that they are the last team and she doesn’t want it to be over. Then they hear the news that it’s a non-elimination and they are still in it but will face a Speed Bump on the next leg. Yay…a non-elimination leg means that I just spent 2,600 words on an episode of little consequence.
(Amusing anecdote: My first grade daughter, who is watching the season for the first time, is convinced that Phil only spared Nicky & Kim from elimination because Kim was upset and crying. Great…now she is really going to think that’s how to get what you want.)
Next week, in what’s possibly a first, David Mumpower and Kim Hollis will get to pinch-recap for me on an actual elimination leg. Plus, the Double U-Turn returns as the teams continue the Race in Abu Dhabi.
Until next Sunday for my power rankings, have a good week.