Top Chef: Seattle Recap
By David Mumpower
February 12, 2013
BoxOfficeProphets.com
The unexpected aspect of Stefan’s removal from Top Chef is that the other players seem to like him a great deal. For all of the creepy Finnish sexuality he exudes, the dude apparently has a good heart. Even Josh wound up becoming his buddy over the course of the season. I had fully expected them to wind up the participants in a murder/suicide pact.
As the chefs reach Alaska, the herd officially has been thinned. The only four remaining players represent four of the top five chefs this season. The other is of course Kristen, the woman who lurks in the loser’s bracket of Last Chance Kitchen. She recently executed her pseudo-boyfriend, Stefan, and thereby ended the most awkward flirtation in the history of reality television.
Josh and Sheldon are the less heralded men who have survived a season of female dominance. Still, I believe that Lizzie is the worst contestant left in the competition, the only one without a victory this season. If tonight goes as expected, Brooke will be the women’s last chance to win Top Chef, barring a victorious return by Kristen.
Only half a dozen episodes ago, I struggled to find a scenario where one of the men emerged victorious. At the time, Stefan had done nothing of note while Josh was closer to the bottom than the top. His ascension down the stretch changed the math quite a bit. Sheldon, not Josh, is the one who has been in danger of elimination a couple of times during that timeframe. While I still feel the Hawaiian is the man best positioned to upset Brooke and/or Kristen, another strong episode by Josh would cause me to re-evaluate my longstanding opinion. Still, I believe this competition is Brooke’s to win.
Tonight’s episode begins with kind words for Stefan. All four remaining players lament his absence with Sheldon going over the top. He states that he considered Stefan the favorite to win, which is a lot like saying that the Chicago Cubs are the clear frontrunner at the start of every baseball season. That track record of never winning anything is a strong indicator of future success, right?
In reality, Sheldon is feeling tremendous relief that he was not the one voted out of the competition because he knows his dish was not up to snuff. Sheldon struggled to find inspiration in the most recent challenge. If he is to continue to the Top Chef finale, our Polynesian friend needs to demonstrate more focus. From the moment he entered the freezer last week, he was too trapped in his own head. The same issue hurt Brooke in the previous episode. The players know what is at stake and they are having trouble addressing the unprecedented pressure.
The capitol of Alaska, Juneau, is the cruise ship’s destination. From this moment forward, the players will be trading in their rain coats for the thickest winter coats they can find. After last season’s snowy fiasco, I am surprised that another icy locale has been selected. Hopefully, nobody is forced to break ingredients out of blocks of ice this season.
As Brooke states, the contestants are in Alaska “five minutes” before their first challenge begins. Padma is standing beside Tracy’s King Crab Shack. Her guest is Sean Brock of Charleston, South Carolina’s Husk & McCragy’s. The man Josh describes as a “culinary idol” is a bit grumpy. As Brock states, he has just taken a 13 hour plane ride in order to taste Alaskan crab. Somebody tell this dude about FedEx.
Sheldon takes the greatest risk of the challenge. He utilizes a technique made famous at Noma. The idea is that grilling some asparagus on top of pine needles can create a distinct flavor as well as a pleasant olfactory experience. It sounds vaguely like eating a Christmas tree. Josh has the worst luck of anyone. His sauce breaks just before his time expires, which means that he has virtually no chance of winning. Worst of all, Josh really wanted to dazzle Sean Brock so this disappointment will leave a mark.
When the chefs present their dishes, Brock proves to be laconic. All he says to Lizzie about her crab frittata is, “This crab is awesome, right?” That statement may not even involve her dish but rather the ingredients used. Sheldon is complimented for his technique but Padma criticizes the texture of the broth in his dish. Brooke mentions a decision to use Dungeness crab as butter flavoring, which causes Brock to perk up with another bit of flowery language: “Expensive butter.” In the L.A. Story vernacular, Mr. Brock is taking a class in conversation.
The judging goes exactly as expected from the above. Brooke and Sheldon are lauded for their inventiveness while Josh and Lizzie have underachieved. In fact, Lizzie absorbs quite a beating because of the volume of capers used in her dish. Meanwhile, Josh should not have used bacon. I know a judge and I can never be friends when the person finds bacon unnecessary. Brooke’s dish sounds like the best; the issue is that she created something too simple. Sheldon may have lost the flavor battle but his decision to attempt a pine-flavored asparagus is endorsed by the judges. He wins the Quickfire challenge, earning $5,000 in the process.
Padma and Mr. Quiet announce the Elimination challenge that will determine the final three. Apparently, Alaskans love salmon and sourdough bread. Mental note: I could never survive in Alaska. If the inclement weather did not get me, the food would. Anyway, the chefs relocate to their temporary home in Alaska. There, they find a sourdough starter that was begun 31 years ago. I’m sure this statement is perfectly reasonable to people within the cooking community. Me, I’d like fresher bread components.
Anyway, the contestants plan their meals and prepare their used bread. Obviously, this is a slow process and there is a lot of downtime. Part of it is spent discussing Josh’s wife. She is two days past due. The communication between the spouses is less than optimal due to her pregnancy and his Top Chef appearance. The time difference isn’t helping any, either.
After Josh stresses over the lack of information, the chefs go fishin’. They are asked to acquire their own salmon for the Elimination challenge. All four players are enthusiastic about the freshness of their product. Poor Lizzie is once again reminded of her recently departed father. The raw nature of her pain is frankly difficult to watch. My heart aches for the impressive South African woman. As soon as the Top Chef season ends, she desperately needs quality time with her family.
Once the chefs reach the kitchen, Tom Colicchio visits. First, he discusses the impending birth of Josh’s child. Josh reveals that his wife is having contractions. He is clearly conflicted about this turn of events. Meanwhile, when Sheldon reveals his plans to cook pea soup and salmon, the head judge reveals that he was asked earlier in the day what he would cook. The answer he had provided was…pea soup and salmon. I like Sheldon’s chances.
Lizzie and Brooke have diametrically opposed experiences with Colicchio. When Lizzie states that she is doing her salmon whole, he hits the table excitedly. “Thank God someone’s doing it whole!” Don’t make it dirty, people. When Brooke is quizzed (interrogated?), she grows defensive and uncomfortable. She states that she is poaching her salmon. Confused, he ponders, “Why did you go this direction?” He indicates that poaching salmon to order is a questionable decision. Her answers do not placate him, either. I do not like Brooke’s chances.
The event for this challenge is the Gold Creek Salmon Bake. The locals are a congenial bunch who goes out of their way to say a kind word in most instances. Given that there is a bear up in a tree right beside them, the optimistic nature of these Alaskans is impressive. The judges, on the other hand, are understandably disconcerted. Nobody ever enjoys their first bear attack.
Brooke begins the proceedings in this challenge. Her dish is sockeye salmon & seafood broth with mustard seed caviar & dill sourdough. The slice of bread is the star of this dish, and it looks impeccable. Emeril Lagasse and Tom Colicchio enjoy the broth and bread. Hugh Acheson notes that the ingredients are visually unpleasant after sitting in the soup for a bit. Sean Brock somehow strings together multiple sentences, all of which are complimentary. Brooke should be safe and may even win the challenge.
Sheldon’s plate is fairly nasty in appearance; it is green tea & chive sourdough with smoked salmon & pea soup. The break’s coloration is such that I would consider it rancid. And pea soup is…well, you’ve all seen The Exorcist. Gail Simmons laughs at Padma Lakshmi’s expression as she tastes the dish. In the host’s own words, she enjoys the flavors of green tea and chives but not in combination.
The dish is also too smoky while Hugh Acheson echoes the thought that had been on the tip of my mind. He correctly points out that the dish looks like baby food. Worst of all for Sheldon, the locals give him grief for using chum salmon, something we later learn is ordinarily reserved for dogs. Yikes! Did I say that I liked Sheldon’s chances but not Brooke’s? I had this one exactly backwards.
The aesthetically pleasing plate of the day belongs to Josh. He presents a roasted garlic sourdough soup with sockeye salmon & black olive croutons. I like absolutely none of these ingredients yet I want to try this dish. The judges generally praise the dish, albeit in measured fashion. The garlic soup is by all accounts tasty. The issue is that this is a bread and salmon dish. The former flavor overpowers the latter, which is problematic, particularly to Tom. I don’t think Josh is in trouble but with so few contestants, blowing 50% of the challenge could be enough to send him home.
Lizzie presents the silliest dish of the challenge. She offers a citrus & beet glazed salmon slider with poppy seed butter & pickles. Yes, it is a slider. My initial reaction is that this is not a bold enough attempt for Top Chef but I have such a bad track record on such assumptions. Hugh loooooooves the bread, stating that hers is the best in the challenge. Lizzie had absolutely no experience in bread-making, so this is a mild upset.
Alas, the rest of the comments are decidedly negative. The citrus and beet flavors are lacking in the dish. Tom immediately presents a scenario that would have elegantly solved the issue. If only he had mentioned this to her in the kitchen… Sean “123 Quiet Mouse!” Brock mentions exactly my concern, that the plate of food is too safe. Emeril quickly agrees. I think that Lizzie is in trouble. In a situation such as this, however, any of three players could be sent home since nobody messed up like Stefan did last week.
Judges Table confirms this belief. All four players experience their fair share of compliments and criticisms. Lizzie suffers the worst fate. Tom presses her about the lack of seasoning on her dish. In debunking this accusation, Lizzie discusses tasting all of the components. Padma asks if she tasted the finished product. The South African is forced to acknowledge that she did not. She is lectured for this, and it is exactly the sort of issue that can persuade judges to eliminate a player.
Perhaps the strangest judging moment of the season occurs when Brooke confesses that she was in freak-out mode when it was time to plate her dish. Hugh candidly states that the judges noticed the panic on her face, and that it was a problem. Moments later, Brooke is chosen the winner of the Elimination Challenge, earning a trip to Costa Rica. I cannot recall another time this season that a winning contestant was dressed down like this.
The other three players are considered the bottom group. The first statement Padma articulates during the judges’ private conversation is that all of the dishes were good just as they were all flawed in some way. Each member of the triad is debated. The only one who is edited as in serious jeopardy is Lizzie. Her failure to taste her dish is a deal-breaker to a couple of them. Moments later, Lizzie is eliminated from Top Chef.
The news does not improve for Lizzie at Last Chance Kitchen. Kristen has set up shop in the House That CJ Built. Easily the best player who was voted out at some point this season, Kristen is faced with legitimate competition for only the second time. Since upending CJ, she has squared off against an inferior chef in Josie and an unmotivated one in Stefan. Both victories were all but assured. Lizzie is not that kind of an opponent yet Kristen emerges victorious once more. Lizzie is eliminated from Last Chance Kitchen and there does not appear to be a Save a Chef poll any longer, either. She is really gone.
Last Chance Kitchen has been odd this season. Only three players have been victorious in individual challenges. Kuniko won the first week. In the following episode, CJ and Tyler beat her then CJ defeated Tyler and Eliza in the next round. The gigantic chef won four more battles before Kristen accidentally wound up in the loser’s bracket. Since then, Kristen is four for four. Ostensibly, Last Chance Kitchen should be a coin flip each week yet CJ and Kristen have stood head and shoulders above the competition. Of course, at 6’10”, CJ is plenty used to that by now.