TiVoPlex
By John Seal
January 7, 2013
BoxOfficeProphets.com
Tuesday 1/8/13
9:15 PM Turner Classic Movies
Bob le Flambeur (1955 FRA):. Roger Duchesne (whose acting career was basically over by the mid ‘50s thanks to accusations of wartime collaboration with the Germans and a predilection for the bottle) stars in this Jean-Pierre Melville classic as the title character, a gone to seed con desperate for One Last Big Job that will leave him fat and happy in his golden years. He plots a casino heist that he hopes will net him and his friends a cool 800 million francs, but as is oft the case, things go awry when Bob's plan is discovered - and he finds himself sucked into the maw of the gambling tables. Filmed beautifully by the great cinematographer Henri Decae, Bob le Flambeur is generally considered to be the film that kicked off what became known as the French "New Wave", but it's also a great caper flick with tremendous appeal for anyone willing to read subtitles.
11:55 PM Showtime Extreme
Creep (2004 GB-GER): No, Radiohead’s alt rock classic is nowhere to be heard on the soundtrack of this low budget British horror flick - instead, music is provided by a slightly lesser known outfit called The Insects. Set in the London Underground, Creep features Franke Potente as Kate, a young woman who falls asleep on the Tube one night and awakens to a horror more terrifying than Boris Johnson’s haircut. There’s lots of running around through murky tunnels, a nasty killer stalking her, and precious few surprises, but the setting makes the film worth a look. If you enjoyed 1972’s Raw Meat or 2008’s Midnight Meat Train, you owe it to yourself to check out this London Transport video nasty.
Wednesday 1/9/13
1:30 AM HBO Signature
Goodbye Cruel World (2010 MEX): Carlos Alberto Orozco plays Angel, a down on his luck accountant, in this enjoyably goofy Mexican comedy. Despite his best efforts, Angel has recently lost his job, and in order to make ends meet falls in with a group of equally inept thieves who provide more in the way of comradeship than they do cold, hard cash. Pushed to the wall, Angel and friends conjure up the ultimate money making plot: stealing a lion from the city zoo and holding it for ransom! Directed by University of Texas grad Jack Zagha Kababie, Goodbye Cruel World drew apt critical comparisons to Jean-Pierre Jeunet’s Micmacs, and won the Feature Film Award at the Austin Film Festival.
3:00 AM HBO 2
Jaws 2 (1978 USA): Get ready for a three night sharkathon courtesy HBO 2! First up is the initial sequel to Steven Spielberg’s 1975 monster box office smash, in which Roy Scheider reprises his role as Amity Police Chief Brody. Once again, Brody’s bucolic burg is threatened by an underwater menace, and it’s up to him to overcome the predictable objections of the town fathers and declare an emergency. Don’t those guys ever learn? Directed by television specialist Jeannot Swarc, Jaws 2 is definitely a lesser effort than its predecessor, but - as we’ll soon discover over the coming days – worse was to come!
3:30 PM Turner Classic Movies
The Face of Fu Manchu (1965 GB-BRD): Christopher Lee delivers the goods as the evil Asian mastermind in this extremely ripe melodrama. Directed with vigor by Don Sharp, The Face of Fu Manchu sees Inspector Nayland Smith (Nigel Green) called in to investigate a series of gruesome stranglings that may be the handiwork of his old nemesis You Know Who. Amongst the stellar supporting cast are Joachim Fuchsberger, Karin Dor, James Robertson Justice, and the unforgettable Tsai Chin as Fu’s wicked sidekick Lin Tang. As an added bonus, this airing marks the film’s widescreen television debut.
Thursday 1/10/13
3:00 AM HBO 2
Jaws 3-D (1983 USA): Told you it was about to get ugly. Here’s sequel number 2, this time shot in crummy 3-D that won’t make you forget Avatar any time soon (though The Hobbit is another matter). Scheider wisely decided to get out whilst the going was still relatively good, ceding responsibility for Amity’s safety to his character’s son, here essayed blandly by Dennis Quaid. Young Brody, however, is not a lawman, but an employee at Sea World, where a Great White is somehow able to infiltrate the premises to threaten cuddly dolphins, penguins, and toddlers. Perhaps it used SNL’s old Candygram disguise to get through the front door.
10:00 AM Encore Action
Cyborg Cop III (1996 USA): And speaking of bad sequels, here’s Cyborg Cop III, which has the honor not only of being a bad sequel, but also being a bad sequel to a bad movie. Also known as Terminal Impact (which title is worse? I’m hard pressed to choose), the plot is the usual old cobblers about super cops designed to survive nuclear war thanks to the introduction of insect DNA into the gene pool. (As we all know, insects are incredibly hardy and long lived.) Cyborg Cop III was shot in South Africa, but you wouldn’t know it, as the film takes place almost entirely indoors.
9:55 PM HBO Signature
Under My Nails (2012 PUR-USA): This Spanish-language drama from Puerto Rico was primarily shot on location during a snowy New York winter and stars newcomer Kisha Burgos as Solimar, a young woman living a hermit-like existence in the Bronx. Orphaned at an early age and raised by her uncle Amalia (Antonio Pantojas), Solimar works at a nail salon, where her only friend is co-worker Rose (Maite Bonilla). The arrival of some new neighbors in the flat next door, however, heralds a change in Solimar’s life, as she’s exposed to their noisy fighting and even noisier sex sessions. The result: a kitchen sink take on the Repulsion meme, with our heroine sinking deeper into loneliness and depression as she develops an unhealthy obsession with all that noise. Burgos - who also wrote the screenplay - is excellent, and though the film’s a slow burner, you’ll be engaged until the end.
Friday 1/11/13
1:25 AM HBO Signature
Extraterrestrial (2011 ESP): HBO Signature is really treating us well this week! I’ve yet to see this Spanish sci-fi comedy, which apparently blends rom-com and alien invasion tropes, but writer-director Nacho Vigalondo’s previous film Timecrimes was excellent. If Extraterrestrial is half as good it’ll still be worth your while.
3:00 AM HBO 2
Jaws: The Revenge (1987 USA): Great White hits barrel bottom in this dreadful (and thankfully final, at least to date) chapter of the Jaws saga. Scheider’s character has mercifully succumbed to a heart attack since his last appearance, Quaid’s has been eaten by a shark, and widow Ellen Brody (Lorraine Gary, who’d skipped Jaws 3-D but had been in the first two films) is left to tackle the ocean’s mightiest predator when it follows her from Martha’s Vineyard to the Bahamas. Yep, this time Sharky has GPS that allows him to track the widow of his worst enemy because, well, who knows why. It’s Jaws: The Revenge - don’t ask questions!
9:30 AM Turner Classic Movies
Background to Danger (1943 USA): It pales in comparison with other Warner Bros suspensers of the period, but this Raoul Walsh-helmed feature is worth watching for its cast alone. Not only do you get the great Peter Lorre/Sydney Greenstreet team, you also get George Raft, Brenda Marshall, Turhan Bey (rest in peace!), Steven Geray, and Kurt Katch. Sure, the story about German spies floating a rumor that Russia is about to invade Turkey isn’t all that good, but whenever Lorre and Greenstreet share the screen, magic still happens.
11:00 PM Turner Classic Movies
The Psychopath (1966 GB): Boy, we’re getting all kinds of goodies in the New Year! Of course, we’d better enjoy them now – February will be 31 Days of Oscar month on TCM, which means a steady diet of movies we’ve seen a million times before. I’m not complaining, mind you – TCM remains the jewel in the crown of my satellite package, and I’m willing to put up with a hundred broadcasts of Funny Lady and Citizen Kane if it means I get one of The Psychopath. Directed by Freddie Francis and penned by the estimable Robert Bloch, this Amicus production tells the sordid tale of a serial killer who leaves behind an unusual clue at each murder scene: a doll fashioned in the likeness of the victim. Too bad this isn’t airing in its original aspect ratio, but beggars can’t be choosers. It’s followed at 12:30 AM by a widescreen airing of 1971’s disappointing Murders In the Rue Morgue, which despite a decent cast –including Jason Robards, Herbert Lom, and Michael Dunn – plays like a rather bloodless made-for-TV movie.
Saturday 1/12/13
6:00 PM The Movie Channel
From Dusk Till Dawn 2 (1999 USA): We have a theme this week - here’s another case of a super cast stuck in a disappointing feature. Robert Patrick, Danny Trejo, Bo Hopkins, and Bruce Campbell are all here, and I’m a huge fan of the original From Dusk Till Dawn (who isn’t?), but (despite the return of Robert Rodriguez as executive producer), the film’s sum is most definitely not the equal of its parts. Basically it's an uninspired, campier remake of the original. From Dusk Till Dawn 2 is followed at 7:30 PM by the somewhat more inspiring From Dusk Till Dawn 3, and the films repeat at 9:00 PM and 10:30 PM.
Monday 1/14/13
12:30 AM Turner Classic Movies
Walkabout (1971 AUS): I’ve written about Walkabout once or twice before, but it’s a truly wonderful film and I can’t resist heaping a bit more praise on it. Set in the Australian outback, the film features Jenny Agutter and Luc Roeg (son of director Nic) as two Anglo children abandoned in the wilderness, only to be rescued and cared for by an Aborigine teenager (legendary Native Australian actor David Gulpilil, in his first role). That’s basically it. Roger Ebert compared Walkabout to Beckett’s Waiting for Godot, and that seems like an apt comparison, as the film lacks much in the way of traditional plot. On the other hand, it’s a stunningly beautiful work of art (and I don’t use that term lightly) that brilliantly illuminates man’s relationship to the Earth, compares and contrasts the concepts of "civilization" and "barbarism", and features a haunting John Barry score. In other words, it’s a must see.