The Amazing Race Recap
The Amazing Race Recap
By Daron Aldridge
December 3, 2012
BoxOfficeProphets.com
Football is done for the day and only 12 minutes over schedule. Let’s head to the Holland starting point and see where this leg takes the teams.
Team Despicable Natalie & Nadiya are in the Fast Forward-resulting first place and leave at 2:55 a.m. for Barcelona, Spain. In Spain, the teams have to take a ferry to the island of Mallorca where performers dressed like demons will have their clue. So, the twins are actually evil will have to interact with people only pretending to be evil. Maybe they can teach the performers a thing or two.
The girls secure seats on the 6 a.m. direct flight to Spain and of course, they are all alone, as we see Team Beefcake Jaymes & James open their clue at 5:57 a.m. Surprisingly, the twins are exhibiting some semblance of humility as they say their primary goal was to not be the first ones eliminated and are not just hoping to make the final three. This is only lip service to me because of the way they have acting on the Race. Actions speak louder than words and their actions are the reason for the “Despicable” in my assigned nickname.
Team Beefcake recaps their U-Turning of Abbie & Ryan and then give us insight into the fact that they don’t even know who the fourth team is. This is just another brick in the wall that seals the fate of Team Beekman. If they are that far behind, those guys are not driven enough to make up that much ground.
Our friendly neighborhood Chippendales performers get to the airport and take off on a 7:20 a.m. flight. Chronologically speaking, Longhorns Trey & Lexi are off the departure mat at 6:38 a.m. and get a flight of their own at 7:55 a.m. Basically, there is a two hour difference between the twins and the dating couple. I’m sure they will try but I don’t know how the producers can paint this leg as anything more than a foregone conclusion with Josh & Brent going home.
Speaking of Team Bleakman (see what I did there…hehehe), they are free to leave Holland at 9:38 a.m. or 38 minutes after the twins have landed in Spain and discovered that the ferry ticket office doesn’t open until 10 a.m.
If my math is correct, which there is a 50/60 chance it’s not, then the flight from Holland to Spain is three hours. So the girls may be on the ferry to Mallorca before the next team even lands. Or maybe not. Jaymes & James have landed and are at the ferry to find out that the boat they will be on doesn’t leave until 11 p.m. Therefore, ALL four teams will be on it. Since Teams Despicable, Beefcake and Longhorn (who arrived shortly thereafter) all have 12 hours to kill, they decide to unwind on the beaches of Spain for the day. Yay for footage of a team I hate enjoying themselves. The upside is that Josh & Brent will be on the same ferry as well and this leg is starting fresh for all teams in theory. But this theory is unproven and I still think that Team Beekman could be labeled Team Weakmen.
And despite being the first ones off the ferry and in a taxi, Josh & Brent once again find themselves separated from the pack in the wrong way. Their cabbie has taken them to the wrong place. The other three teams are at the wildest and most surreal scene yet on The Amazing Race. As they wander through about two dozen performers dressed as demons and playing with fire, the teams are having a difficult time finding the right “demon” with their clue. It’s a most bizarre task that is not too challenging but it may be challenging when they all attempt to go to sleep tonight.
The next clue points the teams to drive themselves to Centro de Alto Rendimento, which appears to be a tennis complex of some sort. The established trio of teams decides to follow on another with Longhorns in front, but they quickly lose the twins, who clearly needed more than one lesson driving a manual transmission car. Thanks to Nadiya’s inability to master the clutch, they may be medically evacuated from the Race due to whiplash injuries. Probably not but a boy can hope, can’t he?
Team Beekman has also navigated the menagerie of demons and have their clue now. With Josh & Brent behind the wheel and Nadiya grasping the basics of the stick shift to get the car rolling, all the teams are heading to the tennis complex.
Team Beefcake and the Texans are the first two there as expected. Trey and James (brown hair, no “y”) assume the Roadblock duties for this leg. They have to select a bucket of tennis balls and a tennis pro. Then the pro feeds the bucket of balls into an automatic ball server. Each person has to return 20 balls in-bounds before getting their next clue.
The athletically-inclined Trey actually plays tennis and makes short work of the challenge. The first attempt is the only one he needs. Alas, our buddy James is not faring so well. The machine is schooling him in embarrassing fashion.
Trey’s domination of the Roadblock puts their next clue in their hands. Team Longhorn is now heading to the Coves de Campanet, where they will descend into the caves and follow the music to their next clue.
I spoke too soon about Nadiya’s driving aptitude. Even my “just good enough” summation was too generous as the twins are still in the town, whereas all the other teams were on nice stretches of wide open spaces en route to the tennis Roadblock. I would like to get my hopes up that they continue to backslide but I doubt it. Josh’s bum ankle will probably flare up again despite him saying it feels better after some rest on the ferry.
James has successfully completed the Roadblock now on his second attempt and they are on the tails of Trey & Lexi. But not too much distance separates them from the Beekmans who are now at the Roadblock as Jaymes & James are leaving.
For some unknown reason, Josh of the aforementioned ankle injury decides that he would take the Roadblock. Quickly he realizes that the ankle was not better and he has already failed at his first attempt. This, my friends, is exactly why I have been consistently ranking them last. Such a decision just proves their poor judgment on the race and inability to grasp how best to approach the challenges. There is no reason that Josh should’ve taken this challenge. Another failed attempt for Josh and a water break later is all the time the twins need to arrive. Nadiya is on the Roadblock for Team Despicable and Natalie is on the sidelines subjecting us to the obnoxious refrain of “C’mon Twinnie” once again. The big plus is that Nadiya fails on the first try.
Brent reminds us that they are not quitters but surprisingly doesn’t reference their goat farm this time. He says Josh just needs to rest the ankle a bit before trying again. The editors oblige with a nicely timed commercial break.
Josh conquers the Roadblock just ahead of the twins…and I mean “just ahead” as Nadiaya finishes immediately after. In the parking lot, of course, the twins look to piggyback on Josh & Brent. Wisely, the guys deflect them by saying they need to stop for directions, despite them having a map. The girls rear an even uglier side (which I didn’t think was possible) as one of them vents that “they are super prepared…they’re gay.” Way to perpetuate an unfounded stereotype. This may seem like a little “throw-away” line but it speaks volumes about the type of people the girls are. So not only are they morally bankrupt when it comes to theft but they also are quick to throw around stereotypical comments about others. Mom and dad must be beaming with pride each week.
Finally at the caves, Jaymes & James and Trey & Lexi all arrive at the same time and decide to search together. They get their clue and it’s the Detour: Spin It or Bull It. For Spin It, they have to repair two blades on a hundred year old windmill. For Bull It, they have to wear what appears to be a bull Halloween costume (one person as the head and the other as…well…not the head). Then they must hit the capes of eight matadors and launch a ninth dummy matador in the air in less than two minutes. My vote would be for Spin It but I am not on either of these teams, so they both select Bull It.
The roundabouts are causing issues for teams and one of them is the reason why Team Longhorn and Team Beefcake split up. While Jaymes & James think they are going in the direction of Bull It, they stumble up the Spin It task and decide to try it. After getting all geared up with safety equipment and tools, the guys are feeling good about happening upon this task instead of the other.
Trey & Lexi are in the arena now and getting all bull-ed up. With Trey navigating from the rear of the bull (it is a very awkward looking set-up), they make easy work of rounding the eight matadors but Lexi charges into the final target. Instead of it launching, it falls over and this is not acceptable. To make it worse, Lexi got a boo boo on one of her fingers. With blood, sweat and tears pouring from her, we go to another commercial.
At the caves, Josh & Brent are tiptoeing toward the guitarists and decide to go with Spin It, which is the exact location of Team Beefcake’s successful reassembly of a windmill. Jaymes & James are finished with the task and get the approval of Don Quixote, along with their clue. They are off to the Pitstop at Castell de Bellver.
The twins are the last ones at the caves and they decide to head toward Spin It.
Back at Bull It, Lexi has wiped away her tears and bandaged up her finger. For their next attempt, they are switching roles and Trey will be the head and Lexi the rump. With her navigating their bull, they easily finish it up. It’s now a race to Phil for the last first place of the Race not giving them a million dollars.
More importantly, the competition to not be last has heated up with Team Beekman and Team Despicable only a couple of minutes apart at Spin It. The guys have geared up when the girls pull into the location. This could be a nail-biter and I really hope it’s not a footrace because there is no way Josh’s bum ankle will propel him ahead of the twins.
If the footage of them on the task is to be believed (and it probably shouldn’t be), Josh & Brent are quite adept at this task and Natalie & Nadiya are quite inept at the task. While the guys are making progress on the Detour, the twins are true to form and bickering back and forth.
After alternating footage of Trey & Lexi and Jaymes & James looking for the castle Pitstop, team number one is Trey & Lexi. They are greeted by Phil and a strange “headless” person. If this episode is your only point of reference, Spain is a very, very strange land. That puts Team Beefcake are team number two.
Over at Spin It, both teams are still plugging away at the task and appear to be neck-and-neck. Josh & Brent remain calm and don’t second guess one another. This means that they are done first and speeding off for the Pitstop before the girls. From their vantage point atop the windmill, the twins see the guys leave and assume with them their chance at a million dollars. Who has two thumbs and the biggest smile ever on his face? This guy right here. The fact that the twins are about to be eliminated is a dream come true. Phil had better not pull a non-elimination out this late in the game.
Josh & Brent get to the mat in third place and will live another day on the Race. I underestimated them once I started seeing their subpar racing ability but I guess they simply need to just be better than only one team to stick around.
Back at the windmill, the twins realize that they should’ve just looked at how the other blades were on before going off all half-cocked. They reflect on their performance and determine that they did themselves in on the race. Yes, they did. They fought with one another. They didn’t work as an actual team.
Well, this season just keeps getting worse. My smile has vanished and I am back in the same unenthusiastic state. Why? Because I fell for the prospect of the twins going home. That’s right…it’s another stinking non-elimination leg. That’s good news for Natalie & Nadiya and bad news for anyone who values decency and good sportsmanship.
So, next week’s season finale will be a whopping two-hour affair, which will include the twins dealing with a Speed Bump and someone will walk away a million dollars richer. I expect everyone to spend this week praying that karma is truly a bitch for Natalie & Nadiya and they are finally punished for their Race behavior with elimination in the first hour.
Have a good week.