Top Chef: Seattle Recap
By David Mumpower
November 21, 2012
BoxOfficeProphets.com
The episode begins with the first appearance of Padma Lakshmi this season. While Emeril Lagasse, Hugh Acheson, Wolfgang Puck and Tom Colicchio ran cooking competitions at their respective restaurants, our favorite hostess was cast aside. This is quickly rectified in “A Shock at the Space Needle” as Padma not only appears but she is joined by three former participants. One of them is her beloved CJ, Chris Jacobsen. Kim, Jason and I have joked at several times over the years that these two would eventually elope because the chemistry between them is tangible. We cannot blame Padma for her passion. CJ is adorable.
Joining them are a chef I mentioned last week, Stefan Richter, and a chef I barely remember, Josie. The reason I do not remember Josie is that she was eliminated fairly early in season two, which you may recall featured an episode wherein a bunch of Top Chef players bullied Marcel Vigneron. Three of the competitors forcibly shaved his head. Good times, good times. Anyway, Josie’s presence wasn’t even a ripple on my radar.
Stefan is a different situation. I mentioned in evaluating John Tesar last week that he appears to be the older model of Stefan, a sublime talent whose interpersonal skills are woefully lacking. Stefan finished in second place during the fifth season. He quickly relays the belief that he should have won instead of Hosea, as he was the best chef during the competition. Alas, this is not accurate.
Carla was the best performer down the stretch. Unfortunately, she was stuck with Casey during the finale, and their joint mistakes undid the current host of The Chew. Also, Hosea was great most of the season save for the time he wasted in an oddly co-dependent relationship with Leah. Stefan may tell himself that he was the strongest performer due to the number of victories he had during the competition. While his six were more than Carla’s four, Stefan narrowly avoided elimination three times in the final four episodes prior to the finale. The myth of his performance does not match the reality. This is a cautionary tale for John Tesar as Top Chef: Seattle begins.
CJ, Stefan and Josie (I think that’s her name) will serve as the judges for the first Quickfire challenge. The 15 entrants group into five trios. They are not randomly assigned, which leads to a bit of strategy. Tesar notes that he aligns with Kuniko because she is “Japanese; maybe she has incredible knife skills." I guess this isn’t racist or xenophobic if it is a positive stereotype. Anyway, Tesar does correctly note that the decisions a contestant deduces prior to the challenge are as important as the dishes themselves. This is Tesar’s age and experience coming to the forefront. He has a plan and people who are analytical about the game have a tendency to go far. See: Richard Blais.
The challenge itself requires the teams to create a dish that highlights local shellfish. Given the Seattle locale, I presume that seafood skill will be a priority all season. The constraint for the Quickfire is a 20 minute time limit. This reduces the number of options for the dishes. Some of the best ingredients cannot be properly cooked in 20 minutes.
A humorous moment occurs as Padma attempts to recite the rules for the Quickfire. John and Kuniko are discussing their tactics for the challenge, by which I mean that John is ordering Kuniko as if she were his underling. His whispers are a bit loud, aggravating Padma. She chastises him with the following exchange. “Excuse me! I’m not finished. Can you listen up?” I’m guessing this is not the first time Tesar has been called to the principal’s office. I fully expect him to be a problem child who acts above the rules from this moment until his eventual elimination.
Geoduck is the dish of choice for a 20 minute shellfish challenge. I learn during the explanations that the dish is pronounced “gooey duck”, which is something I’m glad I heard before I ever tried to order it in a restaurant. My guess would have been humiliating. Anyway, several teams decide to use it but there is not enough of the protein to go around.
“Geoduck is great…except it looks like a penis. A really big one.” --Kristen, who clearly misses her not at all lesbian lover Stephanie
There are some surprises among the teams. John and Kuniko along with Sheldon form a tremendous trifecta. Josh, Eliza and Danyele are an aimless group who lack strong leadership. Bart, Jeffrey and Brooke had struck me as a great trio but they too seem a bit addled during the cooking process. Micah, Kristen and Tyler also seem a bit overwhelmed by their surroundings. Say what you will about John Tesar, his Padma-inciting behavior has created a smooth operation.
Lizzie, Carla and Chrissy suffer the most. The reason for their struggle is simple: Carla. The woman WILL. NOT. SHUT. UP. She is like an autodialer program except that she is real and caller ID does not stop her. I think highly of Lizzie and Chrissy for not killing her and making her the dish of the day. I guess Carla has the shellfish challenge to thank for her survival.
CJ, Stefan and the other one (Josiah? Joanie?) discuss the dishes. CJ breaks the bad news that Eliza, Danyele and Josh delivered the worst dish of the bunch. Josh takes their criticism personally and decides on the spot that Stefan will be his sworn enemy from now until the end of time. Josh clearly has a chip on his shoulder about talented chefs looking down on him. You’re on Top Chef, dude. You’ve made the big time. Be less insecure.
Team Tesar is then informed that they have won the initial Quickfire challenge. This is no surprise given the editing. Of course, my first thought is that there will be no living with John Tesar after this, which is problematic for a show where the contestants all live together. Then, I realize he was going to be a jerk whether or not he won so at least he’ll be a happy jerk for a day. This is doubly true when Padma informs the winning trio that they will draw knives to determine who wins immunity for the day. I think this is ridiculous as all three should win. I get that much more aggravated when Tesar pulls the correct knife to win immunity. Today is his lucky day.
Before the most hated chef in Dallas can celebrate, Top Chef provides a Huge. Shocking. Twist! Ordinarily, I loathe these desperate attempts to create chaos. Today’s surprise is different. Stefan, CJ and Whatsherface are no longer judges. Instead, they are competitors. Remember what I said above about Top Chef: Seattle focusing on quality instead of quantity? Instead, it’s going to focus on both. Stefan and CJ are both high profile chefs whose participation this season fundamentally changes the show’s dynamic. Tesar has gone from the most Stefan-like chef in Seattle to the cut rate version of Stefan himself. Also, there are 18 contenders rather than the anticipated 15. Much has changed.
The returning players are immediately grouped together as a team. Padma coordinates their inclusion with the instructions for the Elimination challenge. The time constraint is an odd one. The six (no longer five) teams will have 47 minutes to prepare their respective dishes. The explanation is that the Seattle Space Needle requires 47 minutes to complete a full rotation. Obviously, this will be the setting for the challenge, an unfortunate turn of events for the chef who is afraid of heights (sorry, Brooke!).
A lot of the trends from the Quickfire carry over to the Elimination challenge. Eliza, Danyele and Josh fail in the preparation stage to the degree that they do not even know the type of fish they select for the challenge. Ye gods, people. Carla also continues to be overbearing and overwhelming. Her personality is an eclipse. The difference is that being too close for too long turns a chef deaf, not blind.
The chefs will be plating for Tom Douglas, the restaurant overlord of Seattle. Gail Simmons, Padma Lakshmi, Emeril Lagasse and Tom Colicchio will be the other judges for this meal. The first two groups to have their food tasted are Team Carla and Team Three People Much Quieter Than Carla. The latter trio is John Tesar’s Quickfire winning bunch.
The kitchen is strange during the pre-service portion of the challenge. The other dozen players can watch as the six chefs prepare their dishes. Carla’s boisterous shenanigans are the subject of ridicule from her competitors. To a person, they agree that win or lose, at least they did not wind up on her team. This is something to monitor as the participants advance further in the game. Fair or not, Carla is seen as an albatross.
Team Carla presents poached salmon with seasonal vegetables & beurre blanc. Ooh, that is white butter. I can translate that one! Meanwhile, Team Tesar delivers a chili oil poached cod with dash and spot prawn shabu shabu. Both dishes look divine. If the plating is this good all season, Top Chef: Seattle is going to be mind boggling. Colicchio reinforces the premise when he states, “These dishes are both, really, REALLY, well done.”
The third and fourth teams to plate are Team Knight and Team Redemption. The knight group includes Belgian Bart, Brooke and Jeffrey. Team Redemption is of course Stefan, CJ and I wanna say Jenna. As I mentioned earlier, Brooke is afraid of heights which means she is too terrified of her surroundings to focus on the horror of presenting her first elimination dish for the judges. The dish is a pan roasted halibut, mushrooms, English peas and wheat beer with herb sabayon. Their plating is a bit sloppy as specks of food clutter the appearance.
Team Redemption has taken a calculated risk with their protein. Recognizing that all of the other teams chosen to use seafood, Stefan and CJ speculate that quail could be the better choice. Stefan suggests it while CJ largely pushes them into the idea. When they start cooking, Stefan quickly regrets the choice as the tiny quail is difficult to cook perfectly. Their resulting output is a quail breast with confit spot prawn, cherries and porcini. The plating is again sublime but my eye is drawn to what looks like an overcooked quail. It looks unappetizing.
The judges are hyper-critical to the point that Douglas comments, “Wow, you guys are tough!” This is in stark contrast to the glowing praise for the first two dishes. Tom locks in on the fact that the quail is overcooked. Emeril quickly adds that the spot prawn is also overcooked. Yikes! There is a legitimate chance that one of the returning players gets eliminated right off the bat. Tom states that it “is a pretty well-developed dish." Maybe that will be enough to save them. The judges are no kinder to Team Knight. Padma refers to her halibut as “a hockey puck." Whoever is responsible for that element may be screwed.
The final two teams are Team Danyele (because I think she’s cute) and Team Micah (because he is a take charge kind of guy). Danyele and Eliza strike me as competent chefs while Josh’s chip continues to grow larger on his shoulder. “I think a lot of people think I’m just this little guy from Oklahoma. And that’ll be their mistake.” The joke’s on them. He’s really from Nebraska! You’re ready for your next movie, M. Night Shyamalan!
Their dish is a pan roasted cod, mushrooms, fava beans, pickled green apple and garlic scape pistou. Even after googling, I’m unclear what a pistou is. It sounds like gazpacho except that it’s not soup. I see nothing on the plate that hints at being a cold sauce. Alas, the mystery of scape pistou will linger, unsolved. Tom Douglas drives the point home when he states, “I feel like I’m begging for pistou.” The apple is universally acknowledged as the best part of the dish.
Team Micah includes the equally confident Kristen and the utterly nondescript Tyler. Their plate is somehow stylish yet disgusting. The crispy seared salmon has a cake-like appearance while the local vegetables are the perfect complementary garnishes. The appeal is undone by the spot prawn butter sauce, which looks like a used handkerchief. I’m sorry for the unpleasant mental image but I cannot imagine putting that sauce in my mouth. This dish is popular as people appreciate the usage of in-season fish. As I stated earlier, this should be a theme throughout the season.
Judges Table is largely anticlimactic. Only one team is invited back. Team Tesar has won for the second time today. Given the reception to the dish, this is not surprising. Tesar of course does most of the talking. To his credit, he credits Kuniko for the chili oil, which is the flavor that sells the dish. Kuniko becomes the first contender on Top Chef: Seattle to win an elimination challenge.
Only two teams are informed that they are on the bottom. Team Redemption and Team Knight, the six players who plated together, have failed at this challenge. One of them will be going home. After a few inquiries, the judges acknowledge that the three components that trouble them the most are the overcooked quail, the hockey puck halibut and the wheat beer with herb sabayon. These three aspects of the dishes were handled by Stefan, Jeffrey and Bart. Bart’s wheat beer was deemed flavorless, which is a huge mistake but probably not on a par with burning the protein.
Something I have always celebrated regarding Top Chef is that even the best chefs are only a single mistake away from elimination. Tonight’s episode is a perfect representation of this philosophy. Stefan and Bart are both world class chefs with significant celebrity yet here they stand at the bottom of a team challenge. Their only hope for survival is that Jeffrey, the relative unknown, has made a mistake so elementary that the judges have no choice but to send him home. Fortunately for them, this is exactly what transpires.
Jeffrey, who seemed so ambivalent about appearing on the show, is harshly critiqued for having 14 minutes to cook a fish that should require 2-3 minutes. He also failed to re-heat the fish afterward. These are basic cooking mistakes, and Jeffrey has to be the one eliminated because of them. To his credit, Jeffrey does not run away from the comments. His closing statement demonstrates tremendous self-awareness. “I usually cook fish perfectly and today, you know, I missed it.” If you can look in the mirror and acknowledge your mistakes, you’re ahead of the game.
Overall, this is shaping up to be a great season. I have generally enjoyed the returning players concept on reality programs. In the case of CJ and Stefan, there are two intriguing personalities added to an already combustible mix. Top Chef: Seattle has a lot of potential.