The Amazing Race Recap
By Daron Aldridge
November 5, 2012
BoxOfficeProphets.com
With James & Abba ripping into their clue as the first team at 8:30 a.m., we learn that they are heading to Istanbul, Turkey, and all I have is They Might Giants’ “Istanbul (Not Constantinople)” repeating in my head. Maybe I will just download it from iTunes and cue up the song at any point when Natalie & Nadiaya begin to annoy. So basically, any time they are on screen.
The more important question is whether the airline will negate Headbangers’ Ball’s lead. Well, the guys head to a travel agent for airline info. Given that we then see Abbie & Ryan leave at 11:04 a.m. and then the twins leave at just after noon, I think that we are looking at a team-bunching situation at the airport.
In their cab, the divorcees both acknowledge the reality check that was visiting Bangladesh. And then Ryan caps it off with “The next time your 51” Samsung TV starts acting up, quit your bitching and visit Dhaka.” It seems that while they wouldn’t trade places with anyone living in Dhaka or have a future promoting Bangladesh tourism, the dating couple realizes how good they have it at home.
Rob & Kelley are next off the mat at 12:31 p.m. So, the twins who have an unfounded and overinflated sense of aptitude are less than a half an hour ahead of the monster truckers. Well, at this point, the order they arrived at the travel agent doesn’t matter as there is only one flight and it doesn’t leave until 6:25 the next morning. So, Abbie & Ryan, who apparently dislike James & Abba as much as they dislike the twins, secure their seats and then just leave the office.
Longhorns Trey & Lexi leave at 12:53 p.m., following by Team Beefcake Jaymes & James at 1:30 a.m. and Team Beekman Josh & Brent at 3:04 p.m. The guys remind us once again that when they lost their jobs and needed to save their farm, they didn’t quit. This is their mantra, which seems more to their benefit than ours.
At the travel agent, the most despicable move by a team this season (and possibly any season) occurs. And who are the perpetrators? Of course, it is Natalie & Nadiaya. When James & Abba leave their money on the counter and walk away to use the computer, one of the twins scoops it up and feigns an attempt to see who left their money but she knows it was James & Abba and like an immoral coward won’t even look at them. The twins then rope Trey & Lexi into their deceitful and outright wrong move by getting them to not point it out to the guys. Natalie then tries to rationalize that she has a good conscience but the competitive drive took over. Well, Natalie, that means that you DON’T have a good conscience. And the fact is that during your confessional/interview segment you are all smiles and giggles shows you are remorseless also. Consider the common idiom: “Character is doing what is right when no one is looking.” These shady individuals chose to do the wrong thing while EVERYONE was looking. Who even knows what they would do when people aren’t looking. I didn’t think I could dislike this team more but they proved me wrong. They have evolved from annoying to unapologetic cheaters. I am done with them and I hope that this is called out by Phil at the end of the leg.
To make matters worse, the whole incident shows that Trey & Lexi’s character is for sale also and that price is half the money stolen from James & Abba. It is mainly Lexi who is perpetuating this deal but Trey is complicit in the wrong-doing. Silence is compliance.
Abba makes the realization that he dropped the money somewhere and he incorrectly assumes that it fell out in the cab. In need of money to even get to the airport, the guys head off to the business district to see if they can scrounge up enough money to cover what was lost and then found by the twins. As a true sign of character, Abba says he feels guilty having to beg for money in a place where there are so many people who have nothing. Speaking of guilt…
…Natalie & Nadiaya are happy to split the stolen money with the Longhorns, so they “can share the guilt.” The fact that the dating couple takes it bothers me more because just ten minutes ago, they were likable and I was rooting for them. I can’t say I am anymore unless they think better of it and return their half to James & Abba when they see them again.
And see them again they will, because James & Abba successfully scrapped together all the money that was stolen because of the generosity of several Dhaka citizens. So while every other team has bad-mouthed or expressed joy in leaving the city, Headbangers’ Ball is humbled by the kindness of people. I will redirect my “rooting” of Trey & Lexi over to James & Abba. Alas, we see no repentance by the Longhorns but all the teams are officially together on the flight to Istanbul (…Not Constantinople).
Upon landing, the teams split up with all but monster truckers and Team Beefcake taking a cab to the Kabatas Ferry Terminal and the first clue. The two rebellious teams are aboard the same subway to the ferry terminal.
Headbangers’ Ball gets the clue first and is instructed to take the ferry across the water to the other side of Istanbul, which is in Asia. Phil explains that this city is the only major metropolis that sits on two continents. Once on the other side they have to find their next clue on the grounds of the Uskudar Terminal. They are the only ones on the first ferry and the next ferry is loaded up with Abbie & Ryan, Team Despicable (Natalie & Nadiaya), Accessory to Team Despicable (Trey & Lexi) and Team Beekman.
On the metro subway, a local drops some knowledge to Team Beefcake that there is zero traffic early in the morning, so taxi would have been way faster. At the next stop, Jaymes & James bale on the train and grab a cab. Rob, in all his “wisdom,” thinks they did that because they are followers and feel the need to be bunched together with the other teams. Poor, foolish Rob. To confirm Rob’s obliviousness, he says that he thinks that Team Beefcake made a huge mistake and this could be the leg that they get a win. If by “win” he means elimination or near elimination, then yes, he is correct. But I don’t think that is what he meant.
James & Abba are the first at the clue and the leg continues its theme of clue-to-clue-to-clue but no challenges. They are heading to Misir Carsisi and store No. 14 for their next clue. It’s like Amazing Race connect-the-dots. We are nearly halfway into the episode and haven’t encountered an actual task yet. Not my favorite format for a leg.
The second ferry docks and the teams see that Headbangers’ Ball is on the scene and heading to the next clue. They all scramble for the clue and then form a caravan to the next destination.
On the other shore, Team Beefcake boards the ferry after noting that several clues had been taken. As Jaymes astutely says, “It wouldn’t be us if we didn’t do something a little off.” At least he is not oblivious like Rob but awareness doesn’t trump Race ability and that is why I rank them so low consistently.
At the Misir Carsisi Spice Bazaar, Trey & Lexi have apparently peeled off from the rest of the group and are the second team there with James & Abba.
The next clue is the Detour (plus this is the location of Josh & Brent’s Speed Bump) with choices between Simit or Scrub It. For Simit, they have to balance a tray full of simits (Turkish bagels) on their head as they deliver to three different locations. For Scrub It, they get their bath supplies and then visit a 16th century bathhouse and get scrubbed down before getting their next clue. Together they both decide to go with Scrub It. Kinda crappy that they are attempting to work together with a team they attempted to help screw over. I wonder if Trey & Lexi are regretting their deceitful alliance with the twins upon seeing James & Abba. Doubtful.
Not too far behind them are the aforementioned Team Despicable, the divorcees and Team Beekman. The non-Speed Bump teams (i.e. Natalie & Nadiaya and Abbie & Ryan) will be joining the first two on Scrub It, while Josh & Brent face down their extra task.
This Speed Bump seems simple enough, with the two of them each having to finish a cone of Turkish ice cream, except the guys appear to be at the wrong ice cream vendor. Thus, they are making this more difficult and time-consuming than need be.
Team Beefcake is now on the Asia side and heading to the Detour clue. Not quite as efficiently traveling are Rob & Kelley, who have finally gotten off the subway and are at the ferry.
Despite shoveling ice cream down their throats, Team Beekman is predictably denied their next clue and they realize that it wasn't a marked vendor. Time for a second serving of ice cream.
The teams that aren’t messing up a Speed Bump or still trying to find the Detour clue box are all enjoying their scrub down Turkish-style. A couple notable comments: Metal James – “I haven’t had this done since I was five.” (I assume he means someone bathing him.) Ryan – “Abbie won’t even do this. I need to get your number, dude.”
Team Beekman finishes their next double scoop and chooses Simit. Brent guesses that the more physical task is quicker. I don’t follow that line of thinking but they'll luck out if another team follows suit and also attempts Simit. Jaymes & James aren’t the ones to do that because they are at the spice bazaar and go with Scrub It.
Josh has a handle on carrying the simits on his head but they haven’t an idea where they are heading. If they hang around too long, then they will be joined by Rob & Kelley, who have also chosen this task.
Trey & Lexi, James & Abba, and Abbie & Ryan are all done getting scrubbed and are pointed to the Kapali Carsi for their next clue.
Team Beefcake has made up some ground because they are at the bathhouse and getting started as the twins are finishing. Even just the slightest overlap on tasks with teams has to be encouraging for the guys, who are their own worst enemy.
Speaking of being your own worst enemy, Josh & Brent’s unwise selection of Simit has yielded nothing but a Brent with a neck pain and no directions to even their first delivery location. More than likely, bull-in-a-china-shop Rob will have equal amounts of trouble.
As the teams dash for the next clue at Kapali Carsi, the severity of Abba’s knee issues resurfaces. He complains that they need to walk as little as possible. While I think the will and ability are there, I don’t know if Abba’s body is physically able to get them to the end of the race. That will definitely be a factor in next week’s rankings (depending upon if they are still in the race.)
The next clue is the Roadblock and they have to serve Turkish Sherbet, collecting 40 lira before getting to move on. Lexi and Ryan don the servers’ gear for their teams, which includes a fez, a vest and a giant serving container that is strapped to their back. Surprisingly, Abba joins them on the task. I didn’t expect him to elect to do this Roadblock but it will be a good test on how bad those knees really are.
As is usually the case, with any Amazing Race task that involves selling anything, it is best to go with the pretty girl. So, Lexi is clearly the frontrunner on this task, while Ryan struggles with this equipment. She credits her cheerleading background but I credit the fact that it is a market full of men and she is only female doing the task so far.
Elsewhere and another elsewhere, Team Beefcake is done with their scrub and Team Beekman is at their first delivery with monster truckers right on their tail.
Creatively, the underperforming Ryan has struck a deal with a man to help sell to his friends for a percentage of the proceeds. It sounds perfectly legitimate in the context of the game, as long as he turns over 40 liras at the end.
Lexi is the first one done and they are heading to the Pitstop at the harbor. Of course, one of the twins spouts off to the camera that Team Longhorn deserves a first place win, or rather they do as long as it’s not Abbie & Ryan. Abbie overhears this and relays what she heard to Ryan when he finishes next. That is probably just more fuel to this highly competitive team. Headbangers’ Ball is done next. It’s a sprint to the Pitstop for three teams or rather for two teams and a slow hobble for another team (James & Abba).
And the first team on the mat is Team Longhorn. They are rewarded with a prize vacation and yet there is no mention made of the stolen money incident and their role. Abbie & Ryan are the next ones at the Pitstop and seem to not be as disappointed at a second place finish as the last leg.
Back-to-back Team Beekman and monster truckers have finished their Simit Detour and Josh & Brent get to the Roadblock first. As Brent suits up, he only sees James of Team Beefcake because Natalie & Nadiaya have also finished the Roadblock and are in fourth place for now.
While James earns his living performing with his Chippendales brethren and selling that fantasy to a bunch of women, he is unable to sell as successfully to random Turkish bazaar customers. That is, until all the ladies start showing up. Several eager females later, Team Beefcake is done and leaving Josh & Brent and Rob & Kelley to duke it out for last place.
Meanwhile, James & Abba are checked in as number three and the twins are number four. Phil lets me down by not addressing the unsportsmanlike act by them toward another team. Maybe that means that if you happen to go into someone’s bag and take their passports so that they get the Justin & Zev-like elimination, that is cool too. It was just an underhanded and dirty move. There is no way I can be convinced of it otherwise, especially given how proud they were of themselves for doing it.
Team Beekman leaves the Roadblock but are just sitting in traffic. They solve the congested street problems by getting out of their cab and directing traffic to clear a path. Pretty ingenious, really. I may have underestimated these guys’ desire and fight to stay on the race.
Team Beefcake is checked in as number five and the editing tries to make us believe that Rob & Kelley have a shot at passing Josh & Brent but not so much. Team Beekman is relieved to hear they are number six. And they use this Pitstop as yet another chance to tell their “no quitting” farm story.
So that, of course, means that Rob & Kelley are last and eliminated from the race. With some touching words about his love of Kelley and some embarrassingly awful dance moves, our monster truckers are gone.
Next week, the teams head to Russia and there is a promise of missed flights by Abbie & Ryan and Josh & Brent. But since David Mumpower and Kim Hollis will be filling in for me, it will probably be another non-elimination leg.
Have a good couple weeks, folks.