The Amazing Race Recap
By Daron Aldridge
October 22, 2012
BoxOfficeProphets.com
There is no time like the present, so let’s get the fourth leg under way.
So long, Indonesia. Hello, Bangladesh. Dating divorcees Abbie & Ryan leave the mat just two minutes ahead of Longhorns Trey & Lexi, which is inconsequential, considering that the travel agent bursts their bubbles that the first flight to their destination doesn’t leave for nearly 12 hours.
As the teams huddle onto the plane, substitutes Gary & Will are trying to play it cool about suspecting Rob & Kelley as the team that U-Turned them, which is correct. And Rob in turn has already adopted the blatant lie that it wasn’t them if confronted. But since both of these teams are bottom feeders at the end of each leg, any duplicity is probably for nothing.
As each of the teams deplanes, those very monster truckers appear to a have an excellent idea - visit the cab stand in the airport terminal, instead of trying to muscle their way outside to hail a cab. With that, they nudge their way into first place. Granted, with the quick succession of teams grabbing taxis, Rob & Kelley’s stint in first place is as short-lived as you would expect. To add insult to injury, the cabbie they did end up with promptly got lost and took them to the landfill instead of the auto body repair shop.
The teams are now holding on tight for dear life as they speed through the crowded streets. Who gets to the clue box first? Abbie & Ryan again, but not with as comfortable of a lead as they and I would like for them to have because twins Natalie & Nadiaya are right behind them. The twins mutter to one another that “these two idiots are here first.” I suspected that the twins had good amount of unmerited arrogance but I didn’t realize how full of themselves they really were. For them to call the clear frontrunners of the Race “idiots” means they are as diluted as they are annoying.
The clue reveals this leg’s Roadblock – Fill in the gaps. The team member has to use auto body putty to repair the damaged section of a bus and then take three pairs of seats out for repair. This is one of those tasks that may not be that hard if the task judge isn’t very picky about the quality of their repair work.
Ryan jumps at the chance take the Roadblock and Natalie does so for her team. As they get to work, Beefcake James (dark hair; no ‘y’) takes the task for his team. For some inexplicable reason, all three teams are dismissive of the option of a Fast Forward that was with their Roadblock clue. WHAT?!?! The teams in the first three spots at the beginning of the leg aren’t even entertaining the notion of the Fast Forward. This blows my mind. Abbie rationalizes that they are already at the task, so they should just do it. Clearly, she doesn’t realize that winning the Fast Forward allows them to skip ALL the tasks on this leg.
As for the other two teams, they seem to have adopted the 'follow the leader' mentality and stay because Abbie & Ryan are ready there. This may be the first time ever that no one even attempts the Fast Forward because typically after the first few teams, the middle and back of the pack assume that of one of the leading teams has already claimed the Fast Forward.
Each of the teams starts the Roadblock and leave it to Nadiaya, one of our obnoxious sisters, to make the painfully unfunny and offensive joke that “we are the only brownies” so she must win to represent minorities. Nadiaya laughs at her own “hilarity” and I bristle at the thought of what they will say next.
Next at the Roadblock are Rob & Kelley, who are equally uninterested in doing the Fast Forward. What is wrong with these people? Do they not get the point of the game? Anyway, Rob steps up and I have to agree with Kelley that since they do their one body repairs on their monster trucks, Rob may have an advantage.
So, three of the four teams are making progress. The lone struggler is Beefcake James, who can’t even get the can of putty open. That is not the demonstration of your abilities that you want plastered all over national television.
Heavy metal James & Abba are next on the scene and are the first ones to even crack open the Fast Forward. This Fast Forward also serves as a one-way ticket to PETA complaint-ville. Phil explains that in Bangladesh, rats destroy 1.5 to 2 million tons of food a year. As such locals are often killing the offending rodents. The team has to go along and collect dead rats from three different locations before they can get the clue, which will point them directly to the leg’s Pitstop. James & Abba keep their loner cred alive by being the only team to attempt the Fast Forward so far.
Boom…boom…boom. The remaining three teams all hit the Roadblock one right after the other. Assuming the duties of the Roadblock are Josh for Team Beekman, Trey for the Longhorns and substitute Gary. More importantly, I am apparently not the only one annoyed by the twins, as Abbie & Ryan are getting increasingly annoyed at Nadiaya’s “cheering” of her “twinsie.” Another reason for me to root for the divorcees: we have a common enemy.
Ryan is the first one done with the putty application portion of the Roadblock, but he hits a snag. Since he was using his hand to smooth out parts of the putty, his clue instructions are now mangled and illegible. Thinking quickly, he approaches Beefcake James about letting him see their instructions and he will explain how to apply the putty. Both live up to their agreement and Abbie points out that this is why alliances can be a good thing.
As for people who are opposed to alliances, Headbangers Ball is having a difficult time finding the first location – a restaurant – to claim dead rats. This Fast Forward is making my skin crawl and kinda makes me nauseous.
Back at the Roadblock, the judge gives Natalie a preliminary thumbs down but a thumbs up for Rob, whose handiwork Trey has been enviously watching. James recognizes the poor quality of his work and starts over. Now Natalie has completed the first portion of the putty part and is off to sanding.
To help squelch his frustration, Abbie talks James off the ledge and the Chippendales dancer credits her with getting him back on track. This is a new aspect to an Amazing Race alliance that we haven’t seen before. Usually, it’s the sharing of information or cab-following. I don’t recall someone from another team actually helping the allied team refocus mentally in the middle of a challenge.
James needn’t worry because Josh, Gary and Trey are all also having to scrap off their putty and start over.
“Long, strong and hard. Long, strong and hard. Long, strong and hard.” That’s the chant that Nadiaya has decided is the best motivator for her sister and the one that initially draws snickers from the other teams. Those giggles quickly devolve into irritation. Ryan is the first one to completely finish the putty portion and starts grabbing the bus seats.
Despite Nadiaya’s claim that everyone else is struggling, Rob is the next one done sanding and he grabs two sections of seats. The next clue, which Ryan gets first, points them to a market, where they must search through thousands of small, dead fish to find one painted with red and yellow Race colors. Even though Rob is second, Natalie isn’t too far behind him.
Back at the Fast Forward, James & Abba have collected the rats from their first location and are off to the second one. I have to give credit to the producers because this is a Fast Forward that actually makes the teams work for it. They must’ve learned from recent Fast Forward failures like the lame remote control helicopter one from last season.
Josh and James have finally conquered the putty application and moved on to sanding, which leaves Longhorn Trey and Gary all alone. The sanding proves less arduous for Teams Beekman and Beefcake, so they are quickly collecting their clue after delivering their seats.
Trey gets the approval to move on to the sanding next. Poor…poor Gary, on the other hand, still can’t get the putty right. If his attempts thus far are any indication, he may still be there today. This is the second Roadblock with which the superfan team has not only struggled but pushed their team to the brink of elimination. They’d better hope that the next challenge is a huge obstacle for at least one team. But honestly, at this point, they should just be channeling all hopefulness toward Gary just completing the Roadblock.
Practice make perfect (or rather, passable) for Gary as he is no longer the only one still applying putty but he’s still in last place. Not in last place but not as much in first as they would like are James & Abba who have now moved on to their third and final rat collection location.
Over at the Shootkir Market, Abbie & Ryan are the first to arrive and find their marked fish. The next clue is the Detour: Pound the Metal or Pound the Cotton. For Metal, the teams have to help a blacksmith hammer a metal rod into a spike. For Cotton, they must use a stick to pound cotton into a feathery consistency and then stuff the cotton into a mattress, before sewing it shut. Once again demonstrating a sense of teamwork I didn’t think they had in them, Ryan defers to Abbie’s ability to sew and they take Cotton. He even goes as far as to tell her, “You tell me what I need to do.” That is why I think these guys are the team to beat. Not only do they complement each well as a team; it’s actually helping them excel on the Race.
The twins and monster truckers are the next two teams at the Detour. Following a quick fish-finding expedition for both, they each select Metal. Checking in with Abbie & Ryan, he is giddy that it seems to be working smoothly and he gleefully chants that Abbie’s one year of fashion institute has paid off.
James & Abba have finished their Bangladesh walking tour/rat scavenger hunt and are now heading to the Pitstop. As they settle into their cab, Abba is using an entire bottle of hand sanitizer on his foot, which apparently got immersed in sewage at some point. And you thought the rats were the most disgusting things they encountered this leg.
Back at the Roadblock, the same order holds with Trey completing it first and Gary bringing up the rear. Will explains that they aren’t happy about being last again but since they are still on the Race, they can win it. Gary was right to describe Will as having a Napoleon complex. With the Longhorns only a short time ahead of them, the substitutes refer to themselves as the comeback kids.
And what do you know…these guys may have just caught another break. Trey & Lexi’s cab breaks down in the middle of the street, which allows Gary & Will to sneak on past them.
After a hard-fought Fast Forward, James & Abba are all smiles with news from Phil that they are indeed team number one. I have to say that I am bit saddened by the number of puns I didn’t get to use because Headbangers Ball didn’t get to do the Pound the Metal Detour.
Back at the Detour, for the first time in history, Cotton is proving harder than Metal. Or at least, the tasks named as such. Abbie & Ryan have left too much of their cotton out of the mattress and have to correct the problem. Meanwhile, Natalie & Nadiaya and Rob & Kelley are a quick one-two finish at Metal. Both are now heading to the Pitstop but are heading via a water ferry and then by foot to the mat and Phil.
Teams Beekman and Beefcake have arrived at the fish searching portion of the leg. It doesn’t really matter that our friendly neighborhood goat farmers Josh & Brent find the marked fish first because Ja(y)mesX2 gets it right after them. Surprisingly, both teams go with Pound the Cotton.
Before they get there, Abbie & Ryan have fixed their mistake and are now racing the twins and monster truckers for second place.
On the road to the Detour, Trey & Lexi’s cab driver’s aggressive driving has made up for this car’s unreliability as they have re-passed Gary & Will. The Longhorns choose Metal and the substitutes take Cotton.
Aboard their ferry, Abbie & Ryan are patiently waiting and praying that no other team shows up before they launch. Their wishes are not fulfilled as the twins climb aboard but on the bright side, Rob & Kelley are still trying to get a cab from the Detour to the water taxi.
It’s revelation time at Pound the Cotton. While Team Beefcake expresses a new appreciation for the Chippendales wardrobe department (I didn’t think they had enough clothes in their act to justify such a department), Brent tells them that Josh used to sew his own costumes when he was a drag queen named Aqua-disiac. With that revelation, Team Beekman has already done something more notable than the previous two legs. Not sure what we do with such knowledge but we now have it.
Josh & Brent get the approval on the mattress but Team Beefcake makes the same mistake as Abbie & Ryan by leaving out a good chunk of the cotton. So, they are stuck behind to greet Gary & Will at Cotton.
The ferry docks are where the footrace commences between the twins and Abbie & Ryan. As expected, the more physically fit Abbie & Ryan are officially number two and Natalie & Nadiaya are number three. Rob & Kelley, who left the Detour at the same time as the twins, have just now arrived at the ferry only moments ahead of Team Beekman. That shows just how lost those two were. While they are probably not eliminated, this is just further proof that they are in over their heads on this race.
Chippendales have completed Cotton and Longhorns have completed Metal. This means that as usual, Gary & Will are the last place team. But they may have caught yet another break. Rob & Kelley took the wrong boat. Instead of docking at the location Swarighat, they took one directly to the Pitstop. Phil won’t check them in until they complete the course correctly.
That error allows Team Beekman to ease into fourth place but before they make it to Phil, they extend a good hand to Trey & Lexi by explaining how they took the same wrong path that the monster truckers did. Speaking of Rob & Kelley, they have course-corrected and are checked in as number five. Of course, Rob took it upon himself to berate their boat driver for taking them to the wrong place. Mind you, this is the same guy who was yelling for someone who speaks English at the Detour, so he likely didn’t communicate properly where he was going.
Behind the married monster truckers are Team Beefcake as number six. Proving to be one of the more complicated transportation instructions on the Race, yet another team messes up. It seems that Gary & Will’s nine Amazing Race lives have been used up because the fact they had to return to the other side to take the ferry means that Trey & Lexi easily secure number seven.
Phil mercifully dashes the substitutes’ happy thoughts of this being a non-elimination leg and the superfans’ attempt at the Race is officially over. It took the guys seven different applications to get on the show but they only made it four legs. It was simply too much for them to handle.
Have a good week.