TiVoPlex
By John Seal
May 21, 2012
BoxOfficeProphets.com
Tuesday 5/22/12
1:15 AM Turner Classic Movies
The End (1978 USA): This is The End, beautiful friend, The End. No, it’s not a Doors promo film, but a Dom Deluise comedy in which the rotund one portrays a mental patient looking to assist a suicidal man to the nearest exit. After a failed attempt via overdose, Sonny (Burt Reynolds, who also directed) finds himself in the loony bin with Marlon (Deluise), and together they cook up a variety of ways to help Sonny pop his clogs. The mustachioed one, however, repeatedly gets cold feet and decides not to check out after all, whilst Marlon is distinctly uninterested in ending the project. Uh oh. The film is a bit scattershot, with its comedy veering from black to slapstick and back again, but Deluise is as always great fun and the supporting cast (Sally Field, Joanne Woodward, Myrna Loy, Pat O’Brien, Norman Fell, Strother Martin, Carl Reiner, and Robby Benson) impressive.
6:30 AM HBO Signature
Earth Made of Glass (2010 USA): History happens in a hurry, and we tend not to learn the truth - if the truth is ever really knowable - until years after the fact. Last year we were sold a war in Libya as a necessary means to prevent a bloodthirsty dictator from killing his own people, but how much of that was the truth and how much hyperbole on the part of the business and power elite eager to get their hands on Libyan oil? If we’re lucky, we’ll find out what’s really going down five, ten, or a hundred years from now. As for Earth Made of Glass, it’s a fascinating reappraisal of the Rwandan genocide of 1994 - a historic moment no one anticipated, and almost everyone responded to inadequately. The film focuses on both the individual search for justice - as personified by a man named Jean Pierre Sagahutu, whose father was murdered in the slaughter - and the national desire for healing, represented by Rwandan President Paul Kagame. In equal parts troubling and uplifting, Earth Made of Glass is a truly outstanding piece of documentary filmmaking.
Wednesday 5/23/12
9:45 PM Turner Classic Movies
Rififi (1955 FRA): Jean Servais stars as Tony, an unrepentant jewel thief out to score one last time (sigh) before his chronic lung disease does him in. He hooks up with a group of fellow baddies (including director Jules Dassin as a dapper safecracker) and plans an elaborate heist. Indeed, the job goes off without a hitch, but when Dassin’s character makes a tiny error of judgment, a competing gangster decides to muscle in on the action, leading to a litany of murder, revenge, and kidnapping. The 20-minute robbery sequence is the bit everyone remembers, but the rest of Rififi is also terrific, most notably Servais’ performance as the doomed protagonist and Philippe Agostini’s stunning cinematography. If you’ve never seen it before, make time for Rififi tonight.
Thursday 5/24/12
1:15 AM Sundance
X (2011 AUS): Who can resist a film with the tagline “A jaded callgirl... a fledging hooker... the night from hell”? I know I can’t. The delightfully named Viva Bianca (paging Russ Meyer and Radley Metzger!) stars as Holly, a Sydney call girl who eyeballs a murder while at, ahem, "work." To make matters worse, the killer is a police associate of one of Holly’s clients…and the bent copper has no qualms about rubbing out witnesses. X is about as grungy and exploitative as a film being aired on Sundance can get.
8:00 AM Fox Movie Channel
Visiting Hours (1981 CAN): Ready for some Canadian horror, eh? It’s aboot time! Here’s Visiting Hours, in which the 100% non-Canadian Lee Grant headlines as Deborah, a tabloid television star who denounces domestic violence on the air - a mistake that immediately attracts the attention of psychotic domestic violence practitioner Colt Hawker (Toronto’s own Michael Ironside). Taken to hospital after Colt’s shocking assault, Deborah befriends nurse Sheila (Linda Purl) - but will they be able to survive the obsessed Colt’s all out assault on the facility and its inhabitants? Co-starring Montreal-born William Shatner as Deborah’s boss, Visiting Hours is a pretty typical slasher flick of the period, but Grant’s fine performance transcends the routine material.
6:35 PM Showtime
Dragonslayer (2011 USA): Joey, do you like movies about gladiators? Wait, let me rephrase that: Joey, do you like movies about aging Peter Pans who’ve spent the better part of the last 20 years trying to pull off the perfect pop-shuvit? If you answered "yes" to the first question, go and rent Airplane; but if your preference is for skateboarding, check out this hagiographic look at aging skate legend Skreech Sandoval. It won’t make you forget Dogtown and Z-Boys, but it might make you hanker for the days when you were young enough to indulge in a little sidewalk surfing yourself. Also airs at 9:35 PM.
Friday 5/25/12
Midnight Turner Classic Movies
The Valachi Papers (1972 FRA-ITA): One wag on IMDb describes this period gangster flick as "Ed Wood meets Francis Ford Coppola," then goes on to detail the film’s many creative anachronisms - the best of which, of course, is the presence of the Twin Towers almost 40 years before they were built. Set during the Great Depression, The Valachi Papers is a highly fictionalized account of the life and times of mob member and FBI informant Joe Valachi, here portrayed by the reliably stone-faced Charles Bronson. Also on hand: the great Lino Ventura as mob boss Vito Genovese, Joseph "Dr. No" Wiseman as bootlegger Salvatore Maranzano, and Jill Ireland as Joe’s loyal spouse Maria. Despite its shot-on-location exteriors, most of this film was actually filmed in Italian studios by director Terence "Dr. No" Young, its Italian supporting cast duly dubbed into English during post-production. Flaws aside, it’s a thoroughly enjoyable gangster flick, and makes its widescreen television debut this morning - and in case you’re wondering, Dr. No star Sean Connery has absolutely no connection to it.
11:00 PM The Movie Channel
Long Weekend (2008 AUS): Remember those ‘70s Chiffon Margarine commercials featuring the immortal line, "it’s not nice to fool Mother Nature?" For some reason, that was the first thing I thought of when I watched Long Weekend. Yeah, it’s true, I’m a little odd. As for the film, it stars Jim Cavaziel as Peter, an unhappy husband on a camping trip with equally grumpy spouse Carla (Claudia Carvan). Peter’s bought a truckload of expensive camping equipment with which to win back his woman’s heart, but Carla remains unimpressed - and to make matters worse, once they make camp and start killing wildlife the local eco-system decides to get its revenge. An inferior remake of a 1978 thriller of the same name, Long Weekend is still worth a look thanks to decent performances by Cazaviel and Carvan and some excellent widescreen cinematography. Also airs 5/26 at 2:00 AM.
Saturday 5/26/12
9:00 AM Turner Classic Movies
Dick Tracy (1937 USA): The first three chapters of this superior Republic serial, featuring Ralph Byrd as the wrist-radio equipped private eye, air this morning. Beware The Spider!
10:15 PM Sundance
Voice (2005 ROK): This film aired more than once as part of Sundance’s Asia Extreme, a series sadly now off the schedule thanks to the channel’s decision to constantly air old episodes of Freaks and Geeks. Thanks, Sundance. Happily, there’s still the occasional opportunity to shoehorn a motion picture into the schedule, and Voice is tonight’s lucky winner. The fourth entry in the very popular Korean horror series Whispering Corridors, Voice tells the tale of talented Young-eon (Ok-bin Kim), a singing schoolgirl turned into a ghost by an errant piece of supernatural sheet music. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but from little acorns grow mighty oaks, and the film develops an impressive tale of mystery and intrigue that relies a lot less on blood and guts than your average Asian horror flick.
Sunday 5/27/12
1:40 AM Fox Movie Channel
Tonight We Raid Calais (1943 USA): They were going to call it Tonight We Dine In Hell, but for some reason changed the title at the last minute. This wartime morale booster stars John Sutton as Geoffrey Carter, a Royal Marine Commando sent on a one-man mission to reconnoiter a German ammo dump in northern France. Carter makes contact with a local farming couple (Lee J. Cobb and Beulah Bondi - neither entirely convincing as French citizens) eager to assist him, but their recalcitrant daughter (Paris native Annabella) objects on the grounds that it was the Brits who lost the battle for France. Yeah, right - I suppose Napoleon conquered the Russians, too! Ultimately, of course, she falls for the dashing Englishman, who promptly gets captured by the Germans in the course of fulfilling his assignment. Written by Waldo Salt and directed by German emigre John Brahm, the film also features Blanche Yurka and Howard Da Silva in supporting roles.
8:00 AM Turner Classic Movies
First to Fight (1967 USA): Remember a few weeks ago, when I suggested that Picture Mommy Dead aired on ‘70s television more than any other film? Well, I may have been wrong: this one showed up an awful lot, too. First to Fight stars handsome young Chad Everett as Jack Connell, a Medal of Honor winner who returns home after a grueling battle on Guadalcanal only to discover that he can’t stand the boredom of training new recruits stateside. Directed by Christian "The Thing" Nyby, First to Fight also features a terrific supporting cast, including Claude Akins, Gene Hackman, Dean Jagger, and Bobby Troup. This screening also marks the film’s letterboxed television debut.
Monday 5/28/12
11:00 PM Sundance
Before the Fall (2008 ESP): It’s an end-of-the-world thriller, Spanish style! Directed by F. Javier Gutierrez (now currently working on an English-language remake of The Monkey’s Paw), Before the Fall looks at the last three days of life on Earth through the eyes of an Andalusian family, waiting for the unavoidable asteroid collision that will put an end to the human race. As you might expect, this is not your typical Hollywood apocalyptic fantasy, with more attention paid to character development and less to bad CGI, but it doesn’t entirely eschew genre strictures - look out for the serial killer on the loose. Thankfully, neither Bruce Willis nor Will Smith show up to save the day.