This Weekend, Watch This
By Curt David
March 16, 2012
BoxOfficeProphets.com

Curt's.....never heard of Jump Street before??!??!
New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? Some people could pick a movie based on the title (Surprisingly, National Treasure, Treasure Island, Muppet Treasure Island, and Treasure Planet all have different genres). Some people watch trailers (misleading), some people listen to their friends (friends can be idiots), and some people only go to the movies if their Hollywood crush is on the screen (one week until my book-crush The Hunger Games comes to theaters! I already bought my ticket).

More likely than not, each weekend there is a movie that you have never heard of in the theaters. I'll save you the hassle of researching every movie by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I'll tell you which movie to watch.

For the weekend of March 16th, the only new movie in wide release is 21 Jump Street. Since it has no competition, I’ll compare it to watching the March Madness tournament.



21 Jump StreetThe March Madness TournamentWINNER (1 point per category)
Clearest TitleIf you’re my age, you haven’t heard of this title before.You have heard about this before, and you made a bracket.March Madness wins the point for this round! (which is more than I can say for my pick of Colorado State).
Best Genre
and Rating		Action/Comedy: Rated R for crude and sexual content, pervasive language, drug material, teen drinking, and some violence Action/Comedy: Rated PG for basketball action. March Madness is a comedy in my house now, as people are laughing that I picked Harvard to win its first game. Each will split the point.
Cleverest Tagline
(out of 5 stars)		“They’re too old for this shift.”

5/5 It’s funny, cause they’re cops pretending to be high school students. 		Another tagline from 21 Jump Street, “The only thing getting blown tonight is their cover.”

5/5 Funny, cause they’re pretending to go to the prom undercover. 		I forgot about my March Madness bracket because of the funny, yet inappropriate taglines. Full point for 21 Jump Street.
Best Part of TrailerWhile the best jokes may be in the trailer, I did laugh a lot. The best part of March Madness is making the bracket. It’s just downhill from here on out for me. I’m enjoying the trailer more than my mom having a better bracket than me right now. Point for the movie.
Coolest Lead ActorChanning Tatum from The Vow, Step Up, and G.I. Joe. There’s a couple of popular college hoops stars, but they aren’t celebrity popular yet. Channing Tatum wins this round (as did VCU over Wichita State, which I predicted. Boo-yah!)
Best CastJonah Hill (Moneyball), Ice Cube (Friday), Chris Parnell (SNL), Ellie Kemper (Bridesmaids), and Holly Robinson Peete (Hangin’ with Mr. Cooper). Don’t pretend that you know five names of college basketball players. You just made your bracket cause everyone else was doing it. 21 Jump Street has the best cast. (Ohio State is going to have the best jumps. Overall winner - you heard it from me first).
Best Street Cred
For the Production		Directors Phil Lord and Chris Miller have also directed Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs. March Madness players actually have a lot of street cred. Point for March Madness. (But I did really enjoy Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs).


So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, 21 Jump Street scores 4 and ½ points and March Madness scores 2 and ½ points.

You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you only want to pay the price of one movie ticket, feel free to wait until next weekend! However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: On paper, 21 Jump Street is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: Apparently, 21 Jump Street used to be a TV show starring Johnny Depp. Bet he’ll have a cameo in this movie.
Conclusion 3: NO WAY! Holly Robinson Peete was also in that late ‘80s show. She’s playing the same character in this movie. Genius!