This Weekend, Watch This
A comparison of the new releases for July 22, 2011
By Curt David
July 22, 2011
BoxOfficeProphets.com

We all have different ways of coping with puberty....
New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? Some people could pick a movie based on the title (surprisingly, Bewitched, Blair Witch Project, and Race to Witch Mountain all have different genres). Some people watch trailers (misleading), some people listen to their friends (friends can be idiots), and some people only go to the movies if their Hollywood crush is on the screen (Two weeks until my Slumdog Millionaire crush Freida Pinto returns to the big screen!!!).

More likely than not, each weekend there is a movie that you have never heard of in the theaters. I'll save you the hassle of researching every movie, by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I'll tell you which movie to watch.

For the weekend of July 22nd, the movies in wide release are Captain America: The First Avenger and Friends with Benefits.


Captain America: The First Avenger Friends with Benefits WINNER (1 point per category)
Clearest TitleThis sounds like a movie based on the famous Marvel superhero. This sounds like a movie based on a philosophy that never works out well. I already don't like this movie. The patriotic movie wins the point for clearest title.
Best Genre
and Rating		Action:

Rated PG-13 for intense sequences of sci-fi violence and action. 		Romantic Comedy:

Rated R for sexual content and language. 		Friends with Benefits is a horrible plot for a Romantic Comedy. The action movie wins the point.
Cleverest Tagline
(out of 5 stars)		Avenge.

Meh. It's a verb. Sounds like avenger.

2/5 		N/A

What the front door? This movie could have done well this round.

0/5 		Blow out. Captain America wins its third point.
Best Part of TrailerThe trailer I just saw online was 10 times better than the one from the theaters. It makes the story look good along with the special effects. Okay, despite my hatred for this film a few seconds ago, the trailer seemed a little funny and charming. But no match for Captain America. Point. Which is actually point #4. Column's over. You can stop reading now.
Coolest Lead ActorChris Evans from Fantastic Four and Push. Justin Timberlake from Bad Teacher, The Social Network, and hosting SNL. Timberlake just brought sexy back to this column. Point.
Best CastTommy Lee Jones (Men in Black), Stanley Tucci (Devil Wears Prada), and Hugo Weaving (The Matrix). Mila Kunis (Black Swan), Patricia Clarkson and Emma Stone (Easy A), Woody Harrelson (Cheers), and Andy Samberg (SNL) Mila Kunis. Nuf said. Friends with Benefits just scored two solid points.
Best Street Cred
For the Production		Director Joe Johnston also directed Jumanji, October Sky, and Jurassic Park III. Director and writer Will Gluck also directed Easy A. Joe Johnston just barely wins this round (go watch October Sky)...but I really liked the movie Easy A.


So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Captain America scores 5 points and Friends with Benefits scores 2 points.

You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you want a movie with romance, comedy, action, and drama, feel free to watch Harry Potter again. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: On paper, Captain America is the best movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: Interestingly, Patricia Clarkson and Emma Stone starred with Stanley Tucci in Easy A. And Patricia Clarkson, Justin Timberlake, and Andy Samberg all starred in Saturday Night Live's Motherlover digital short. That's all. I just found that interesting.
Conclusion 3: I saw Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 twice last weekend! Now it's time for me to start reading the books.