TiVoPlex
By John Seal
June 13, 2011
BoxOfficeProphets.com
Tuesday 6/14/11
6:30 AM Encore Dramatic Stories
The Philadelphia Experiment (1984 USA): True story: if I’d played my cards right, I might have worked on this film. When I was 17 years old, my father - at the time a loan officer at a small Southern California bank - introduced me to a filmmaker client, with an eye to getting me connected to the movie biz. Being a man of the world at 17, I promptly blew the opportunity and haven’t looked back since. Nope, no regrets at all. The filmmaker was a gentleman named Doug Curtis, who would go on to produce this film and many others, including Nice Girls Don’t Explode, Next Friday, Freddy vs. Jason, and this year’s delightfully titled Shark Attack 3D. As for The Philadelphia Experiment, it’s a time travel tale of two sailors (Michael Pare and Bobby di Cicco) who find themselves transported from a World War II naval shipyard to the amazing future of 1984. Thoroughly disgusted by the brave new world of Duran Duran, Charles in Charge, and Chia Pets, the two desperately want to return ‘home’...but can they reach the portal to the past before it’s too late? Or will they be stuck in the '80s, where they’ll meet a rueful would-be best boy named John Seal? Tune in to find out!
Wednesday 6/15/11
4:30 AM The Movie Channel
Hunter Prey (2010 USA): Here’s something you don’t see every day (at least not these days): a medium-budget, independently made science fiction film that is actually pretty good. Produced by Sandy Collora - whose 2003 effort Batman: Dead End was a huge hit on the convention and comic book geek circuit - Hunter Prey takes place on Prometheus, a planet (played by Baja California) on which a space cruiser has crash-landed. The damaged ship has been carrying a dangerous prisoner named Jericho (Clark Bartram), and when he escapes from the wreckage the surviving crew begin a desperate attempt to recapture him. Jericho, however, is too smart for them, and one by one, his would-be captors fall victim to his wily ways. There’s definitely a bit of Enemy Mine in Hunter Prey - both thematically and visually - but it’s still a breath of fresh air in a pretty stale genre, and looks great in widescreen. (And no, the Patrick Magee in the cast isn’t that Patrick Magee.) Also airs at 7:30 AM.
9:50 AM Sundance
Carny (2007 USA): This film has aired on Sundance in the past, but it still doesn’t have an entry in IMDb. Odd. It’s an excellent documentary about the humble sideshow worker, the endangered but surprisingly hardy species still stubbornly hustling its way through the fairgrounds and tilt-a-whirls of America - and still considered unwelcome company in polite circles. This Carny is the perfect double bill partner for 1980’s fictional Carny, a solid Gary Busey drama which really needs to get hauled out the vault sometime soon by Sundance or TCM.
Thursday 6/16/11
5:00 PM Turner Classic Movies
Attack of the 50-Foot Woman (1958 USA): This week’s Drive-In Double Feature kicks off with Attack of the 50-Foot Woman, a classic AIP thriller starring voluptuous Allison Hayes as Nancy Archer, a distaff version of The Amazing Colossal Man who’d terrified audiences six months prior. Nancy, an alcoholic in an unhappy marriage, has a night on the tiles that takes a bizarre turn when she encounters a radioactive alien in the middle of the desert. After soaking up enough isotopes to power L.A. for a month she begins to grow...and as she gains inches, her desire for revenge against lousy husband Harry (William Hudson) begins to grow, too. Hell hath no fury like a 50-foot woman scorned! It’s followed at 6:30 PM by Village of the Giants (1965), a sci-fi comedy about groovy teenagers (including a very young Beau Bridges) who ingest a chemical that turns them into behemoths; at 8:00 PM by Queen of Outer Space (1955), featuring the incomparable and apparently immortal Zsa Zsa Gabor in the title role; at 9:30 PM by Mars Needs Women (1965), a truly execrable comedy headlined by Tommy Kirk as an inter-galactic bride-hunter; at 11:00 PM by The Cyclops (1957), a rare Bert I. Gordon joint about a huge one-eyed Mexican monster; at 12:30 AM by The Manster (1959), an above-average shot-in-Japan tale of science gone horribly wrong; and at 1:45 AM by The Killer Shrews (1959), in which dogs with dentures masquerade as deadly rodents.
Friday 6/17/11
5:30 AM Sundance
Join Us (2007 USA): If you’ve ever felt like joining a cult or have tried to persuade a family member to join one, here’s a film that may give you pause. Directed by Ondi Timoner, whose 2004 doc Dig! dug deep into the tortured relationship between indie rockers The Brian Jonestown Massacre and major label musos The Dandy Warhols, Join Us takes a look at a family trying to escape the clutches of Mountain Rock Church, an innocuously named South Carolina cult. The film also more broadly examines the meaning of the word "cult": it’s estimated that up to 15,000,000 Americans belong to one, and that doesn’t include folks who subscribe to mainstream religion or either of the major political parties! Could your next door neighbor be amongst them? Watch Join Us and start casting furtive sideways glances their way!
1:45 PM Turner Classic Movies
Lizzie (1957 USA): Hugo Haas was one of the most interesting filmmakers of the 1950s. Responsible for a series of social problem pictures steeped in the conventions of the classic melodrama - including the remarkable 1959 miscegenation feature Night of the Quarter Moon - the Czech-born Haas frequently wrote, directed, produced, and appeared in his films. Haas did it all in Lizzie, and had an excellent cast - including Joan Blondell, Eleanor Parker, and Richard Boone - to help tell his tale of multiple personalities, which beat The Three Faces of Eve to the box-office by several months. Look for Mrs. C. herself, Marion Ross, in a small but crucial role. How about a Hugo Haas film fest, TCM?
Saturday 6/18/11
8:00 AM Turner Classic Movies
Ace Drummond (1936 USA): TCM recently revived their Saturday morning chapter play series by airing all 12 episodes of 1939’s Buck Rogers. Now that Buck’s futuristic adventures have come to end, the channel brings us the first two chapters of this Universal serial, in which B-western veteran John ‘Dusty’ King portrays the title character, a granite-jawed "G-Man of the Sky" sent by Uncle Sam to Mongolia and tasked to take down a villain known as The Dragon. If you enjoy chapter plays, this is a good one, with familiar faces such as C. Montague Shaw, Lon Chaney Jr., and Jean Rogers on hand to enliven the proceedings.
9:00 AM Turner Classic Movies
Tarzan and the Huntress (1947 USA): Jane’s back, but sadly she’s now portrayed by dishwater dull Brenda Joyce instead of sultry siren Maureen O’Sullivan. In RKO Tarzan flick number five, the Jungle Lord (Johnny Weissmuller) does battle with a wicked big game huntress (Patricia Morison, still with us today at 97) looking to capture some of the T-Man’s animal companions, whom she intends to sell to wildlife hungry zoos. Girlfriend, the T-Man is about to teach you a lesson.
8:00 AM More Max
Switch (1991 USA): Body switch movies were all the rage in the '80s and '90s. With the traditional post-war nuclear family in its final death throes during the Reagan and Bush 1 years, Hollywood seemed to revel in the gleeful reversal of gender and age roles. In Switch (love the incredibly original title), Jimmy Smits stars as Walter, a guy whose best friend Steve (Perry King) is murdered and reincarnated as a woman (Ellen Barkin). Now tasked by Satan to find the love of a good woman or spend an eternity burning in Hell, male chauvinist pig Steve must take his new body in a distinctively Sapphic direction. This being a Blake Edwards film, the potential for softcore exploitation is almost entirely avoided, leaving Switch as a pretty average example of the genre - albeit one with a solid supporting cast (Lysette Anthony, Lorraine Braco, Bruce Payne, and Catherine Keener).
Sunday 6/19/11
1:00 AM Encore Dramatic Stories
Dream Lover (1994 USA): Anyone else here have a thing for Mädchen Amick? It’s not just that she’s gorgeous - well, she is - but her name is enough to give any red-blooded male goose-bumps. In Dream Lover, the charming Ms. Amick plays Lena Mathers, a femme fatale who meets cute with architect Ray Reardon (James Spader) over a glass of spilled wine. Ray is naturally enchanted by the wondrous Lena, and the relationship blossoms rapidly into marriage. But is she really who he thinks she is...or are there some unpleasant skeletons in Lena’s massive walk-in closet? It would be easy to lump Dream Lover into the "erotic thriller" genre so popular at the time (and even more prevalent than body switch movies), but the absence of Shannon Tweed suggests it’s something a bit more. Look for ugly mug character actor Irwin Keyes as a policeman.
10:40 PM Encore
Something Wild (1986 USA): I hate Melanie Griffith. Her squeaky little girl voice drives me up the wall. That said, she’s really rather good in Something Wild, in which she plays a bad girl with a Louise Brooks bob who gets a hapless guy into trouble over the course of a crazy weekend. Griffith plays Audrey Hankel, aka Lulu (of course), a carefree gal who whisks uptight yuppie Charles (Jeff Bridges) from his workaday world for a couple days of fun and frolic. Little does Charles know, however, that Audrey has an ex-con hubby (Ray Liotta) who’s none too happy that his wife’s been playing the field. Well directed by Jonathan Demme, Something Wild co-stars Tracey Walter as a liquor store owner and John Waters as a used car salesman. Also airs 6/20 at 1:40 AM.