How to Spend $20
By David Mumpower
May 17, 2011
BoxOfficeProphets.com
For people who want to see the hottest batch of female leads this side of Sucker Punch: The Roommate (PG-13)
While her run on Friday Night Lights has been over for a while now, Minka Kelly's stunning good looks continue to linger in the minds of cheerleader outfit fetishists everywhere. Meanwhile, Leighton Meester attained celebrity thanks to her presence on Gossip Girl, but with a popular music release and several other clever appearances such as Entourage have identified her as more than just the next Tori Spelling. The combination of the two of them in a Single White Female theme seemed like a genius pairing, and from a box office perspective it was. The $16 million production opened to $15 million. Those are the type of numbers that keep movie makers employed.
Unfortunately, the movie itself is a disaster of epic proportions. Only 4% (!) of Rotten Tomatoes critics enjoyed the thriller; more remarkably, NONE of the top critics gave the movie a positive review. In other words, this is a title you will get only if A) you think one of the cast members is so hot that you are willing to pay money simply to ogle them for 90 minutes (a valid reason) or B) you think that movie critics are idiots. Either way, you cannot say that you went unwarned.
For people who want to see Anthony Hopkins collect another paycheck at the expense of his pride: The Rite
Yes, the above is a cheap shot and yes, anyone who has watched The Wolfman knows there is more than a kernel of truth in the statement. Still, The Rite does offer some appeal for consumers who want to see the latest Exorcist knock-off. As is the case with The Roommate, The Rite is a box office winner, at least somewhat. It earned only $33 million domestically against a $37 million budget, but its worldwide total currently sits near $100 million. The combination of one of the most storied actors of the past quarter century and a premise that blatantly apes The Exorcist is appealing to some. The source material for the film is particularly shameless; its subtitle is The Making of a Modern Exorcist. That is exactly what this project was intended to be, a knockoff of a greater work. It's no different than The Roommate in this regard with the difference being that it is a better film judged more harshly since it is comparing itself to a release a bit higher in quality than Single White Female. At least Hopkins is back in a role that showcases his abilities in Thor.
For people who know what the hammer is: Thor: Tales of Asgard
Speaking of Thor, Marvel has released another straight-to-DVD title that should convert the unexpectedly warm reception of the film into more money for the kings of the comic book industry. The character of Thor may not be as well known as some other major characters in comics, but the depth of Norse mythology always ensures he has plenty of monsters to fight. And since Thor is a crazy guy who drinks too much, his stories are usually a lot of fun. Plus, most of the Marvel Animation titles to date have been quite good. I recommend Ultimate Avengers, Dr. Strange: The Sorcerer Supreme and Planet Hulk in particular. If you like to make yours Marvel, this is a no-brainer purchase.
If you like Alias and miss Alias and want to watch a show that desperately hopes to remind you of Alias: Covert Affairs: Season One (Not Rated)
Out of the new releases this week, this is the oddest for me to state an opinion. I was excited about the idea of an Alias clone on USA Network, the best run cable channel these days. I also love the lead actors in the cast. Piper Perabo, Christopher Gorham, Anne Dudek and Kate Matchett are all people whose works I have enjoyed over the years whether they be the heralded (Dudek as Cutthroat Bitch on House), the unheralded (Gorham was a better version of Chuck on Jake 2.0), the brief (Matchett was sublime in a handful of appearances on Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip) or the unknown (Perabo is so winning in Imagine Me & You). I was excited to watch the pilot and while there were clunky elements in it that distracted me, I felt that there were enough positives there to make for a great show. Then, I found out that Mohinder, the worst part of a terrible show in Heroes, had joined the cast. Even though I had a season pass on Amazon Streaming and am continuing to purchase the digital rights for Covert Affairs, I haven't gone back yet. I own all of season one on DVD and I keep meaning to give it another shot but...Monhinder. From Heroes. If you were braver than me and decided to keep watching in spite of his presence, drop me a note and let me know if he ruins Covert Affairs every bit as much as I suspect.
Pick of the Week
For people who have a fetish for bald Brits: The Mechanic
Several years ago on this site, I postulated that The One and later The Transporter could open the door for a truly gifted action hero, Jason Statham, to work indefinitely in low rent thuggery films. I am unsure which of us is more surprised by how true this statement has proven to be, him or me. The Statham name brand guarantees a certain level of box office; this is not something most lead actors working in the industry today can state with any honesty. No, his flicks are not blockbusters. They have a baseline in the $10 million opening/$30 million final domestic result range. But he does sell tickets.
Keeping this in mind, The Mechanic is largely a known commodity. Based on a Charles Bronson film from 1972, this is a perfect project for Statham, the Charles Bronson of our era. In the original, Jan-Michael Vincent (yes, the dude from Airwolf) portrayed a young assassin tutored by seasoned pro wetworks specialist Bronson. In the 2011 version, 3:10 to Yuma scene stealer Ben Foster takes on the role of a would-be assassin attempting to avenge his father's murder. Statham's character takes the grieving son under his wing and helps him learn how to kill for a living. No, this isn't Shakespeare but we live in a world where the finest Shakespearean actor in recent memory directs Thor. If you want to see Jason Statham be cool yet again, this is a moderately well reviewed action film that fits brilliantly in his film library.
DVD:
The Roommate (PG-13)
The Rite (PG-13)
The Mechanic (R)
I Want Your Money (PG)
Broken Hill (PG)
2011 NCAA Mens Basketball National Champions (Not Rated)
30 For 30 Volume 2 (Not Rated)
30 For 30 Volumes 1 & 2 (Not Rated)
Alabama Moon (PG)
All in the Family: The Complete Ninth Season (Not Rated)
Allison & Lillia Generation 1 (Not Rated)
Amanda Knox: Murder on Trial in Italy (Not Rated)
American Experience: Freedom Riders (Not Rated)
American Experience: George Washington (Not Rated)
Ancient Astronauts: Gods from Planet X (Not Rated)
Araya (Not Rated)
Avril Lavigne: The Whole Picture (Not Rated)
Ballistica (Not Rated)
Barney: I Can Do It (Not Rated)
Bettle Queen Conquers Tokyo (Not Rated)
Beyonce: Life on Stage (Not Rated)
Beyond the Game (Not Rated)
Biebermania! (Not Rated)
The Bionic Woman: Season 2 (Not Rated)
Black Eyed Peas: United We Stand (Not Rated)
Blood Shed (Not Rated)
Braille (Not Rated)
Brian Eno: 1971-1977 The Man Who Fell to Earth (Not Rated)
British Rail Journeys: East Anglia (Not Rated)
British Royal Weddings of the 20th Century (Not Rated)
Brotherhood (R)
Can Go Through Skin (Not Rated)
Chicago Cubs: The Heart & Soul of Chicago (Not Rated)
Chocolate Sundaes Presents Live on Sunset Strip 2 (Not Rated)
Circles of Deceit (Not Rated)
Classic U.S. Aircraft of WWII: P-38 Lightning (Not Rated)
Coldplay: Longevity (Not Rated)
Corporate Cut Throat Massacre (Not Rated)
Covert Affairs: Season One (Not Rated)
Daydream Nation (R)
Dead Or Alive: Daring Exercise Of UltraViolent Ext (Not Rated)
Deadly Shooter (R)
Degrassi the Next Generation: Season 10 (Not Rated)
Detention (Not Rated)
Die & Let Live / Raising The Stakes (Not Rated)
Elephant White (R)
Emerging Past Motion Picture (Not Rated)
An Erotic Vampire in Paris Collection
Exploited (Not Rated)
The Feathered Serpent: Complete Series (Not Rated)
The Fergusons (Not Rated)
Flashpoint: 3 Season Pack (Not Rated)
Flashpoint: The Third Season (Not Rated)
Forget Me Not (Not Rated)
Fourth World War (Not Rated)
Franklin: Franklin & The Gloomy Day (Not Rated)
Freedom Archives: Cointelpro 101 (Not Rated)
Getting Smart: Dealing with Bullies (Not Rated)
Glenn Tilbrook: Live in New York City (Not Rated)
Gospel & R&B Drumming (Not Rated)
Green Paradise: The Complete Collection (Not Rated)
Guitar Kings (Not Rated)
He (Not Rated)
Histories of the Holocaust: Buchenwald 1937-1945 (Not Rated)
I Heart Doomsday (Not Rated)
Jay Z: True Story (Not Rated)
Ju-on: White Ghost, Black Ghost (Not Rated)
Kanye West: Evolution (Not Rated)
Katie Melua With The Stuttard (Not Rated)
Keith Richards: Human Riff (Not Rated)
Kesha: Her Life, Her Story (Not Rated)
Kickstart Your Health with Dr. Neal Barnard (Not Rated)
La Belle Personne
Les Paul: Live In New York (Not Rated)
Louis Prima: In Person (Not Rated)
Memoirs of a Lady Ninja (Not Rated)
Midnight is a Place (Not Rated)
Mob Rules (R)
My Bloody Wedding (Not Rated)
Nature's Power Revealed (Not Rated)
Nick Jr. Favorites: Food with Friends! (Not Rated)
Nik Kershaw: Live in Germany 1984 (Not Rated)
Noel Redding: Redding Experience (Not Rated)
NOVA: Venom - Nature's Killer (Not Rated)
Orgasm Diaries (Not Rated)
The Other Woman (R)
Project A-KO (Not Rated)
Radical Truth: Knowledge & Revolution (Not Rated)Red, White & Blue (Not Rated)
Revenge (Not Rated)
Rihanna: The Rise & Rise of Rihanna (Not Rated)
Rio Freaks: Volume 6 (Not Rated)
Rivers of a Lost Coast (Not Rated)
Royal Pains: Season Two (Not Rated)
Schoolgirls In Chains / Terror Circus (Not Rated)
Secrets of the Divine: The Altarpiece of Ciudad (Not Rated)
Shutterbug (Not Rated)
Skin Eating Jungle Vampires (Not Rated)
Slim to None (Not Rated)
Smokin': Classic Cigarette Commercials (Not Rated)
Sons of the City: New York (Not Rated)
Sophia Loren: Award Collection (Not Rated)
South Riding (Not Rated)
Stripperland! (Not Rated)
Such Good Friends (Not Rated)
Takedown (R)
That's What I Am (PG)
Thomas & Friends: Birthday Express (Not Rated)
Thor: Tales of Asgard (Not Rated)
Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job: Season 5 (Not Rated)
Tom Waits: One Star Shining (Not Rated)
Twisted Desires: Three Pink Masterpieces (Not Rated)
UFOs & Extraterrestrial Threat: Battlefield Earth (Not Rated)
Untold Secrets: Civil War Collection (Not Rated)
Vampire Knight Guilty Volume 2 (Not Rated)
Vanishing on 7th Street (R)
Wartorn 1861-2010 (Not Rated)
Who?Mag TV: Season One (Not Rated)
The Wild Thornberrys: Season 1 (Not Rated)
Witchcraft: Magick Rituals of the Coven (Not Rated)
WWE: Greatest Superstars of Wrestlemania (Not Rated)
Blu Ray:
American Experience: Freedom Riders
Best of Europe Collection
Best of Europe: Beautiful France
Best of Europe: Beautiful Germany
Best of Europe: Beautiful Greece
Beverly Hills Cop
Children of the Corn V / Children of the Corn 666
The Comancheros
Daydream Nation
Deep Red
Diabolique
Elephant White
Five Deadly Venoms
Green Paradise: Africa
Green Paradise: The Americas
Green Paradise: The Pacific
Halloween: Curse of Michael Myers / Halloween: H20
Heaven & Hell: Radio City Music Hall Live
Hellraiser: Bloodline / Hellraiser V: Inferno
The Hustler
I Want Your Money
IMAX: Greatest Places
IMAX: Search For The Great Sharks
Jagged Edge
Ju-on: White Ghost, Black Ghost
The Karate Kid / The Karate Kid Part II
Les Paul: Live In New York
Lockdown
Marriage Italian Style
The Mechanic
Money Train
My Boss's Daughter / Duplex
The Other Woman
Pale Flower
Pokemon Heroes / Pokemon: Destiny Deoxys
The Rite
The Roommate
Scenic National Park Collection
Scenic National Parks: Alaska & Hawaii
Scenic National Parks: Best of the National Parks
Scenic National Parks: Glacier Banff & Jasper
Scenic National Parks: Grand Canyon
Scenic National Parks: Great Train Rides
Scenic National Parks: Yellowstone
Scenic National Parks: Yosemite
Scenic National Parks: Zion & Bryce
Sons of the City: New York
Sunflower
Thor: Tales of Asgard
Twilight Zone: Season 4
Vanishing on 7th Street
Yesterday, Today And Tomorrow
The Big Bang