Trailer Hitch
By BOP Staff
November 10, 2010
BoxOfficeProphets.com

These chicks totally wiped me out in Halo last night. The one on the left teabags.

Sucker Punch

Josh Spiegel: Someone tell me I'm not the only person who doesn't get the fascination with Zack Snyder. I let out an audible groan when it was announced that he'd take over the reins of the Superman franchise, partly because it proves that, yes, Virginia, Christopher Nolan (that franchise's new producer) is a fallible human. Snyder's previous films are interminable dirges of misery, and Sucker Punch looks no different, essentially taking every bad or half-formed idea from every action movie ever made and boiling it up into an inedible stew. I will be first to say I'm wrong, but I have zero interest in this film and can't imagine liking it.

David Mumpower: Josh, I strongly suspect your issue is that Snyder doesn't make movies. He makes videogames. That's aces by me as I like videogames. I completely understand why his works doesn't move a lot of people; I just happen to disagree. Well, I don't disagree about Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga'Hoole, which should have been a *much* better movie than it was. And I also think that 300 is an uneven film yet ultimately a satisfying one. The two Snyder flicks that are dear to my heart are his thankless adaptation of Watchmen, a no-win situation that I thought he handled with aplomb, and Dawn of the Dead, one of BOP's favorite horror films of the 2000s. I guess it's fair to say that I am the target audience for Snyder's works.

Surprisingly, I am on the fence about Sucker Punch thus far. I was joking on Facebook that the more honest title for this is Hot Chicks in The Matrix during its Inception. That's honestly how I perceive the clips shown in the trailers. This appears to be another one of those "your mind creates entire worlds" stories. The rationale for this story structure is obvious. It allows the filmmaker to create modular, encapsulated realms with new and different visual aesthetics each iteration. These are videogame levels rather than acts of a screenplay. Sucker Punch isn't even subtle about this, giving the lead actress (i.e. the videogame player) an assigned list of items to collect. Sucker Punch is not just a Matrix clone; it's also a Legend of Zelda clone.

There are definitely strong aspects to the trailer. The kick to the face of the giant gargoyle thing holding a turret is a money shot. The sword slice of fire is also great. And God knows the cast is among the sexiest we've ever seen in a movie. Still, I'm not sure how to feel when I see that Scott Glenn isn't even trying with his dialogue. He's so wooden that he comes across as robotic, and I'm holding out hope that maybe he IS a robot. That would make it all right. If he's not, he's a great actor who didn't try hard enough in this film. I get the vibe that we may be saying that about a lot of people in Sucker Punch. It looks to be every bit as divisive as Watchmen if not moreso.

One other comment: the background song, Panic Switch by Silversun Pickups, is a perfect complement to the trailer. Kudos to whomever cut that clip.

Kim Hollis: This movie has dragons. This movie has airships. And although it looks utterly ridiculous, because it has dragons and airships, I'm there.

Brett Beach: Having seen the teaser last summer and now this, feels to me like the difference between having a slice of cheesecake and the whole damn thing. By this measure a feature film (with an epic running time, I presume) will leave me feeling like Mr. Creosote on the verge of accepting the mint. I hate to accuse a trailer of overselling the film, but I am frankly exhausted after two and a half minutes, even if they are simply the highlights. It seems like every possible male fantasy crammed into one film of women and (insert phallic accompaniment here), then coated over with a guise of female empowerment.

Which all shouldn't be taken as blanket criticism, just that I share the concerns of Josh and David. I am more intrigued for this than anything Snyder has done to date. If he could make a film with perhaps less narrative and the same level of visceral intensity, perhaps that would be to his advantage?

David Mumpower: Upon reflection, here's my question. Why does the giant gargoyle thing need a turret? He's 50 feet tall and made of granite. Also, which company makes turrets for monsters his size and how big are the bullets?

I probably should not try to put any realism into this commercial, should I?

Michael Lynderey: Outside of maybe 300, I wouldn't say Zack Snyder makes video games (nothing about Watchmen reminded me of a game - certainly not the two hours-worth of dialogue). But he certainly has made his share of divisive films, especially in the last three years, and Sucker Punch looks like another one. It's hard (if not impossible) to motivate the action movie base to turn out and see a special effects movie starring an entirely female cast (and a very young cast at that), especially when the source material isn't there to support it. The trailer fits that perception I have of the film, though it certainly does look intriguing, at least to me. The fantasyland element reminds me of The Lovely Bones, which isn't the type of movie you want to be compared with at the box office, though I'm thinking they may end up on similar ground.

David Mumpower: For what it’s worth, I think it opens to Watchmen numbers at a minimum. The term “opium of the masses” is applicable to shiny other world movies like this.

I Am Number Four

David Mumpower: We are witnessing several different iterations of this same concept, done first and best in Unbreakable. Of course, this particular trailer looks more like Jumper and The Covenant than anything else. I like it anyway, which means that I'm willing to forgive D.J. Caruso for what went wrong with Eagle Eye, a brilliant concept that made for a wildly disappointing flick. I like the slow, Predators-ish reveal about how people are being hunted, presumably for sport. Then, the dude throws out the glow-y hands and we realize it's an entirely different genre. I also like when the woman knee-slides her way to stabbing a dude's anatomy. My primary concern here is that the Eagle Eye trailer was also white hot, but then the movie focused on some sort of giant red orb that proved to be a lot less competent than the first half hour had indicated. Still, it's got a stabby super-powered babe and Timothy Olyphant. That's all I ask from the genre.

Josh Spiegel: Did I miss Timothy Olyphant in that trailer, David? I didn't see him up close, and thinking I'd see him made the prospect of watching the trailer more exciting than the trailer itself. That said, the premise is interesting, and some of the scenes looked interesting enough. My wife will want to see it because the main love interest is on Glee, which sets her tender heart a-flame. I would say the movie looks better than Jumper - a LOT better - but isn't a must-see for me yet. Maybe when there's more footage I'll be swayed.

David Mumpower: Now that you mention it, I'm not sure Olyphant is in a single shot. Note to whomever cut the trailer: you blew it. As for Jumper, I Am Number Four looks better by default because it doesn't have to show Hayden Christensen try to act.

Michael Lynderey: Considering that release date, Number Four is clearly looking to corner some of the same market as Percy Jackson did this year. But really, it's the kind of trailer where I come away with having absolutely no opinion on the film or what it might be like. Could be a masterpiece, for all I know. Could be real bad. I don't think, at this point, that what's on the screen in the trailer is going to get anyone particularly excited for the film. More red meat is needed.

Kim Hollis: I thought this appeared to skew older than Percy Jackson, and younger than Jumper (although I admit it forcibly reminds me of the latter film). The premise is interesting enough, but it's not something I'll be running out to see on opening day or anything. However, if Timothy Olyphant had been in the marketing/trailer, I might have felt differently.

Hall Pass

Josh Spiegel: As I said on my Twitter page, this movie takes place in a world where being married to Jenna Fischer is a bad thing. This is a strange, frightening place I never want to visit. For the most part, Hall Pass looks pretty bad, but almost inoffensively so. I love Fischer (as an actress, as an actress), and Stephen Merchant is incredibly funny when he's paired with Ricky Gervais, but with the exception of seeing Jason Sudeikis as the outrageous type in a raunchy comedy, this one looks pretty flat.

Kim Hollis: Maybe it's because I have an undying love for Owen Wilson (he's on my laminated list), but I laughed a fair amount at the Hall Pass trailer. I think it's silly looking in a good way. I hadn't felt that way about a Farrelly Bros. film for awhile, so I count that as a good thing. I suppose it's possible all the funny parts are in the trailer, but Owen will get me in the theater.

Michael Lynderey: Some funny parts, some not so much.

But the real highlight for me is seeing Richard Jenkins, one of my favorite actors, who is evidently yet again plugged into a bizarre supporting role.

One thing I can assure everyone here, though: every last cent this film makes will be due to Jenkins, and Jenkins alone. He is that big a draw.

David Mumpower: I was expecting to dislike the trailer in that Owen Wilson's recent comedy selections have been *ahem* mediocre and the next time Jason Sudeikis makes me laugh will be the first. Despite this innate bias against the movie, I laughed quite a bit. I like the premise in that any time I hear the phrase "No matter how hot she looks, there is someone who is sick of her crap", I always think that people who say that deserve to be single. This movie explores that very premise in a humorous manner, showing how well a bunch of average looking guys would do when they try to pick up women at the hottest local spot they know...Applebees.

I can save the reader a lot of time by saying that your opinion of the trailer (and probably the film itself) will be determined by whether you think this is funny:

Hall Pass - A week off from marriage to do whatever you want without consequences.

Presumably, this is based off of the Andrei Kirilenko story from a years ago wherein it was revealed that his wife, a Russian pop star, lets him have one groupie a year. And you know the type of having I mean. As Josh mentioned, anyone married to Jenna Fischer shouldn't need the groupie, but I'm sure the same is said of Kirilenko's attractive, famous wife, Masha Lopatova. It's not like Owen Wilson could get a date if he weren't famous anyway. Still, this looks like good Farrelly Brothers rather than bad, so I'll give it a shot.

Tangent: This movie comes out on February 25th. I expect Hall Pass-based divorces to begin around the second week of March.