This Weekend, Watch This
A comparison of the new releases for July 30, 2010
By Curt David
July 30, 2010
BoxOfficeProphets.com

Dammit, boys, I told you to be careful with the Crazy Glue....
New movies are released into theaters every weekend. How do you decide which movie to watch? Some people could pick a movie based on the title (surprisingly, Sleeping Beauty, Black Beauty, American Beauty, and Beauty Shop all have different genres). Some people watch trailers (misleading), some people listen to their friends (friends can be idiots), and some people only go to the movies if their Hollywood crush is on the screen (My Top 10: Actresses I have crushed on... #3: Belle from Beauty and the Beast).

More likely than not, each weekend there is a movie that you have never heard of in the theaters. I'll save you the hassle of researching every movie, by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I'll tell you which movie to watch.

For the weekend of July 30th, the movies in wide release are Cats & Dogs: Revenge of Kitty Galore, Charlie St. Cloud, and Dinner for Schmucks.

Cats & Dogs: Revenge of Kitty Galore Charlie St. Cloud Dinner for Schmucks WINNER
(1 point per category)
Clearest TitleI remember watching the first Cats and Dogs movie (cute). I don´t recall the name Kitty Galore (but that´s funny to say). I don´t recall the name Charlie St. Cloud (It´s not that funny to say). I like this title, despite it not being clear. (It can get a gold star instead of the point) Cats and Dogs is going to be about cats and dogs. Point.
Best Genre
and Rating		Comedy

Rated PG for animal action and humor. 		Drama

Rated PG-13 for language including some sexual references, an intense accident scene, and some sensuality. 		Comedy

Rated PG-13 for sequences of crude and sexual content, some partial nudity, and language. 		I don´t think I´ve ever typed "animal action" before. New ratings usually win the points. Point for Cats and Dogs.
Cleverest Tagline
(out of 5 stars)		"Just like real spies...only furrier"

Animals talking and acting like spies. Cute.

2/5 stars 		"Life is for living"

Sounds profound the first time you read it. Sounds ridiculous if you read it a couple more times.

1/5 stars 		"This summer, B.Y.O.Schmuck"

Good tagline. Tells you when it´ll be released. Has a party theme. Yet, you bring a schmuck instead of beer.

4/5 stars 		Dinner for Schmucks RSVPs with the point for the best tagline.
Best Part of TrailerKids are going to like it. I even laughed once. It actually seems like an alright dramatic movie. Steve Carell + Funny = good trailer. I´ve watched every trailer for all the movies this summer. This is only the second trailer that will make me buy a ticket. Point for Dinner for Schmucks.
Coolest Lead ActorBette Midler is the voice of Kitty Galore. Your parents know her from her music albums and famous comedies from the '80s. Zac Efron. Your younger sisters know him from the High School Musical trilogy and 17 Again (which actually was a pretty good movie...for real) Steve Carell. You know him from The Office, Get Smart, Evan Almighty, and The 40 Year Old Virgin. I sort of think that if you combine Bette Midler with Zac Efron, you would get Steve Carell. Or not. Either way, point for Michael Scott.
Best Cast MemberThe voices in this movie are from Christina Applegate, Neil Patrick Harris, Sean Hayes, James Marsden, Roger Moore, Chris O´Donnell, Nick Nolte, Jack McBrayer, and Fred Armisen. The supporting actors in this movie are Ray Liotta, Kim Basinger, and the younger brother of James Franco. The supporting actors in this movie are Paul Rudd, Jeff Dunham, Zach Galifianakis, and a character called "Boy Running From Vulture." Cats and Dogs has the most impressive cast list, albeit just voices. I actually really like the actors from the other movies too. Let´s split the point three ways.
Best Street Cred
For the Production		Writers Ron Friedman and Steve Bencich have also written Open Season, Chicken Little, and Brother Bear. Director Burr Steers has also directed 17 Again, written How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, and acted in Pulp Fiction. Director Jay Roach has also directed the three Austin Powers movies and the two Meet the Parents movies. The guy who has directed the original Austin Powers has to win this round. Point for Mr. Roach.


So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, Dinner for Schmucks scores 4 1/3 points, Cats and Dogs: Revenge of Kitty Galore scores 2 1/3 points, and Charlie St. Cloud scores 1/3 point.

You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if you are a teenage girl or are going on a romantic date, you should watch Charlie St. Cloud. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.

Conclusion 1: On paper, Dinner for Schmucks is the movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: I think I remember watching the first Cats and Dogs nine years ago and not liking the last five minutes of the movie, because of some plot inaccuracy. Yes, I take my family films pretty seriously.
Conclusion 3: Interesting (at least to me) is that I typed the following words in this column: Black Beauty, Beast, Cats, Dogs, Kitty, Animal, Furrier, Vulture, Chicken, Bear, Roach, and Open Season.