Make an Argument
By Eric Hughes
July 21, 2010
BoxOfficeProphets.com

This is what Motley Lue meant when they sang about the looks that kill.

Note: This column is, shall we say, filled with as many spoilers as the number of women Don Draper has been inside of. If you’re an avid Mad Men devotee, proceed as planned. If, however, you’ve yet to see one of the best things on television or, gulp, have no immediate plans to start it – shame on you? – click the back arrow on your browser.

Still with me? Good. Do yourself a favor and whip up an Old Fashioned – or better yet, train your kids to do so a la Don’s little ones – and let’s get things going.

Two of my favorite dramas on television ended things last year with game changing episodes. And yet, dubbing their respective finales “game changers” feels cheap. It doesn’t do justice.

For Dexter, it was the kind of finale that in its lingering moments dropped a bomb, leaving me paralyzed in my chair and too stunned to worry what to do about the jaw that had up to that point in my life been hinged in my mouth. It was the kind of finale that would require a good amount of pondering, a lot of feel-good food intake and, maybe, a lot of therapy.

For Mad Men, its “oh shit!” moments unspooled over the course of an hour. So, by the time the show made its final fade to black of the year, I had an irrepressible urge to find out what would happen next. Me at 11:01 EDT: “Oh hey, thanks for the fun, Matt. But let’s get season four going… stat.”

With Dexter I could wait. With Mad Men, I needed to know. And I needed to know now (Or, I guess, then).

Fortunately, we’re only days away from Mad Men’s most anticipated season premiere to date. Here are the things that have been gnawing at my mind, and what I think their outcomes could be:

What will Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce be like?

When we last saw Don and Co., it wasn’t of them within the lush, expansive offices of Sterling Cooper but from the condensed and very crowded workspace of a measly hotel room. Their decision to collectively get fired from their employer was swift, but carefully planned. It was the most exhilarating chain of events in all of season three. (And, probably, the show).

That final episode brought with it the birth of a new advertising agency – that of Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce. An agency, of course, with less space, people and resources than the one we’d been accustomed to.

Even so, SCDP matches its pratfalls with unyielding amounts of character and determination. It exists because all eight of its members want it to. Had they had doubts on that idea, any one of them would have rejected an offer to start from scratch and either remained at Sterling Cooper, aligned with Duck or, maybe, something else.

From the start, SCDP will be little more than a do-it-yourself agency. Even though its principal members brought with them some high-profile accounts, you’d sooner see Bert wear shoes inside than you would anything approaching the well-oiled machine that was Sterling Cooper.

In fact, I hope they make blunders. I hope they make devastating mistakes that threaten the already fragile foundation of SCDP. Because it wouldn’t be Mad Men if everything just sort of, you know, worked out.

The question is: How far into the future will season four be set? Knowing Weiner, he’ll deny us that vulnerable first week of business. And while we’re at it, he’ll refuse those first couple weeks, too.

Instead, I imagine Mad Men 2.0 will be set a few months – three? four? – from “Shut the Door. Have a Seat.” That way, we still see SCDP with its feet wet, but after they’ve grown accustomed to their new digs.

What’s going to happen to Sterling Cooper and our friends who didn’t make SCDP’s cut?

It seems hard to believe that we’ve parted ways with Sterling Cooper as we know it. Most every episode occurred within the confines of that building, be it between the ground floor lobby, the main floor space or inside one of its offices like Don Draper’s lair or the thinking room Peggy Olson smoked pot in.

Yet, maybe it’s a sign of maturity for us to accept that a majority of an episode’s runtime will no longer take place within that familiar space. The Sterling Cooper floor may be awesome and iconic, but the eight-person team behind SCDP will have moved on from that place by the time we get reacquainted, and so should we.

I wouldn’t expect Sterling Cooper, and those characters we left behind there, to be major players in season four, but I would like to see their faces again, possibly in a storyline that pits the office we used to play voyeur to with the so-new-it’s-embarrassing SCDP.

One rivalry in particular that never gets old is Pete v. Ken. In season three, the two were pitted against each other to become Sterling Cooper’s head of accounts. Even though Ken brings a lawnmower into the office that later digs into a dude's lower body, he would eventually be tapped as department leader. As much as I detest Pete, I’d love to see him enact retribution while at the helm of a younger company.

One casting decision I can’t compromise on would be that of Bryan Batt, who starred on Mad Men as closeted gay Sal Romano. Sal’s story arc seemed far from complete – he hasn’t even sexed a man! – and yet sources confirm he’ll be absent from season four. ‘Tis a pity, since his character deserves a more proper conclusion (or perhaps a fresh career with SCDP).

What’s Betty going to be up to?

When season three came to a close, Betty Draper was on her way to Reno with Henry to prepare for her divorce with Don. As hard as it is to believe that Betty and Don are no longer together, it’s important to remember that Judd Apatow doesn’t produce Mad Men and therefore the show features female characters who make respectable decisions.

I’m not gung ho about Henry, but I do like that Betty figured out that Don isn’t a good fit for her. He cheated on her, he stole another dude’s identity… you know, pretty major signals that he’s not the family man she thought he was.

I do wish Betty well, but I think she can do better than Nelson Rockefeller’s director of public relations and research. He’s a bit drab for my taste, and scenes between him and Betty drag some. Hopefully in the space between season three and four, Mad Men writers have given Henry more to work with.

And for screen time, I'd expect Betty and her new life to be just as important to the Mad Men universe as before. January Jones has been an integral part of the show since its inception. When Jones gets nominated for an award, it's for lead actress, not supporting. I'd expect to see just as much Betty as we usually do - only this time without Don by her side.