TiVoPlex
By John Seal
January 19, 2010
BoxOfficeProphets.com
Tuesday 1/19/10
1:50 AM Cinemax
Dim Sum Funeral (2008 USA): If there's dim sum available at your next funeral, won't you please invite me? In the meantime, I'll have to make do with the celluloid variety featured in this decent if predictable ensemble drama from Chinese-American director Anna Chi. The film examines a quartet of estranged siblings reunited by the death of their mother, word of which has been conveyed to them by her gweilo housekeeper (Talia Shire). There's realtor Victoria (Francoise Yip), who's had a child out of wedlock with a black man; plastic surgeon Alexander (Russell Wong), who's cheating on his beauty queen wife; divorced journalist Elizabeth (Julia Nickson-Soul), and (shock! horror!) lesbian film star Mei Mei (Steph Song) - and the four of them can only agree on one thing: Mom was a bit of a bitch, but we'd better give her the best darn send-off ever! You've seen it all before, but the cast - especially Bai Ling, who delivers the goods as Mei Mei's kohl-eyed girlfriend Deedee - are uniformly fine. Also airs at 4:50 PM.
8:30 AM Turner Classic Movies
A Time to Sing (1968 USA): To everything there is a season...and in 1968, after The Byrds had already made their transition to country-rock, country-western artist and apprentice hell-raiser Hank Williams Jr.'s season done showed up. Finally stepping out of the massive shadow cast by his daddy, Hank Junior got the big screen treatment courtesy MGM, then suffering diminishing returns from Elvis movies and increasingly desperate to cash in on contemporary pop culture. This being hidebound MGM, however, they opted for the most conservative element of pop music and made a really boring movie starring the son of the most important country artist of the mid-20th century. That's Sam Katzman Entertainment! As for Junior, he plays Grady Dodd, whose aspirations to entertain millions are being stymied by stick-in-the-mud Uncle Kermit (Ed Begley the Elder), who thinks tobacco farming is much superior to honky tonkin' when it comes to career options. There's also love interest, of course, in the predictable form of Shelley Fabares, and even future black action regular D'urville Martin gets a look-in. The real enticement for music fans, however, is the presence of gospel singer Clara Ward - though how she ended up in the film is beyond me. Directed by Arthur Dreifuss (The Love-Ins, Riot on Sunset Strip), A Time to Sing makes its widescreen television debut this morning.
Wednesday 1/20/10
7:00 PM Turner Classic Movies
Mission to Moscow (1943 USA): One of the films later accused of being too nice to our (then) Soviet allies, Mission to Moscow stars Walter Huston as Ambassador Joseph Davies, whose autobiography supplied the basis for Howard Koch's screenplay. Directed by Michael Curtiz, the film is too long and is, indeed, quite generous in its assessment of Stalin and his pals - understandable indiscretions in 1943 that later came to the attention of the House Un-American Activities Committee and led to the blacklist, which counted Koch amongst its victims. As a film, Mission to Moscow is pretty boring - even for me, there's a limit to the effectiveness of endless speechifying by Huston - and now is little more than a curate's egg. As social document and propaganda, however, it's priceless.
Thursday 1/21/10
1:30 AM Starz
Tyson (2008 USA): If this were airing on Sundance or even HBO, it would be a muckraking expose of everyone's least favorite poultry company. This being Starz, however, it's a Mike Tyson hagiography directed by, strangely enough, James Toback, a filmmaker more commonly associated with subtle chamber pieces. Apparently Tyson and Toback have been buds for many years, and the film does present Iron Mike in the best possible light, but it's also revealing and utterly compelling stuff. Whether you're a boxing fan, an armchair psychiatrist, or a gourmand who enjoys noshing on human ear from time to time, you'll want to get into the ring with Tyson. Also airs at 4:30 AM.
4:45 AM Turner Classic Movies
Crooner (1932 USA): I'm a David Manners fan. There aren't many of us, because he wasn't much of an actor (his default setting when the camera turned on was sunny optimism and little else), but ever since an enterprising freelance writer discovered him living in a California nursing home in the 1990s I've been fascinated by him. After essaying lead roles in Dracula, The Mummy, and The Death Kiss, amongst others, Manners retired in 1936, took up painting and writing, and lived a good long life which finally ended in 1998 at the ripe old age of 97. As for Crooner, I don't know what to expect - I've never seen the film, and there are no reviews for it on IMDb (nor has it acquired the requisite five votes needed to give it a user rating) - but this is definitely the TiVoPlex Movie of the Week. A First National comedy directed by reliable Lloyd Bacon and co-starring Ann Dvorak, Claire Dodd, Guy Kibbee, and J. Carroll Naish, Crooner is unlikely to be a lost classic, but with Manners in the lead, who cares?
7:00 AM Sundance
Chalk (2006 USA): A mockumentary about the parlous state of American public education, Chalk takes viewers on an uncomfortable but droll trip into the belly of the beast. Written by former teachers Mike Akel and Chris Mass (and directed by Akel), Chalk examines the classroom lives of three teachers: newly hired history instructor Mr. Lowery (Troy Schremmer), who finds his students thoroughly disengaged from his material; veteran Mr. Stroope (Mass), who's convinced himself he finally has a shot at winning Teacher of the Year; and Coach Webb (Janelle Schremmer), who's a little too eager to disabuse us of the notion that all female P.E. instructors are lesbians. Shot in Austin, Texas and featuring some of Akel and Mass's former students in supporting roles, this film fest favorite also airs at 12:00 PM.
8:30 PM Sundance
Mermaid (2007 RUS): Appearances aside, I'm not just picking films with one word titles this week. Though this is the fourth one in a row...so maybe, subconsciously, I am. As for the film itself, Mermaid is a Russian fantasy about Alisa (Masha Shalaeva), the product of a one-night stand who can move inanimate objects using only the power of her mind. Alisa is trying to live the life of a normal Moscow university student, but she meets con man Sasha (Yevgeni Tsyganov), who convinces her to help him in his latest real estate venture: selling land on the Moon. Though it all sounds like a recipe for Amelie-style quirkiness, Mermaid defies easy categorization, not least thanks to a surprising and unsettling denouement that will knock you back on your heels.
Friday 1/22/10
8:30 PM Encore Dramatic Stories
Star 80 (1983 USA): From time to time I've herein sung the praises of actor Eric Roberts, whose career has forever been overshadowed by that of his less talented sibling Julia. Said career arguably reached its apex in 1983's Star 80, in which Roberts delivers a bravura performance as a complete asshole. The orifice in question is Paul Snider, an aspiring talent agent who discovers lovely Dorothy Stratten (Mariel Hemingway) behind the counter of his neighborhood Dairy Queen. Snider immediately kens that she'll make terrific centerfold material and (by extension) will help him fulfil his own dreams and desires for a life of comfort and ease - but it's a long way to the top and a slippery slope besides. Directed by Bob Fosse, Star 80 charts a grim path indeed, as Paul and Dorothy's mutually destructive relationship takes them to places they never intended to go. One of the most downbeat films of the 1980s, Star 80 would have been better received during the cynical ‘70s, but just wasn't welcome in Reagan's Shining City on a Hill. Sunny and optimistic it ain't.
11:15 PM Turner Classic Movies
Superstition (1982 CAN): ‘80' isn't a word, so we're going to count Superstition as our record-breaking sixth one-word title in a row. Can you feel the history happening? A Canadian chiller about a witch who returns from the past to haunt and murderize the present, Superstition is a slowly paced and rather polite affair with a couple of decent shocks and not much else, unless you count Albert Salmi as ‘much else'. It does, however, make its widescreen television debut this evening.
Saturday 1/23/10
3:15 AM Sundance
Noise (2007 AUS): Seven!! Now we're having fun, kids! And unlike Superstition, Noise is actually quite a good film, so I'm not just using it as an excuse to extend the one-word title streak. Written and directed by Aussie Matthew Saville, the film surveys the physical and mental wreckage left in the wake of a suburban murder spree. Brendan Cowell plays McGahan, a tinnitus-plagued Melbourne copper assigned to the case, but not exactly rushing to get to the bottom of things. Will the killer strike again before McGahan tracks him (or her) down? Or will that annoying buzzing sound in McGahan's ears drive him to insanity first? Also airs at 11:45 AM.
Sunday 1/24/10
10:05 AM Encore Dramatic Stories
Paradise Now (2005 PAL-FRA-GER-ISR): It's encouraging to note that, other differences aside, Israel and ‘The Palestinian Territories' can co-produce films together. Case in point: Paradise Now, Palestine's Best Foreign Language Film entrant for the 2006 Oscars and the product of Nazareth-born filmmaker Hany Abu-Assad. Kais Nashef and Ali Suliman star as Said and Khaled, two 30-something mechanics recruited to set off a bomb in Tel Aviv. The film examines their preparations in considerable detail, as the two disguise themselves as Jewish settlers in order to get as close to their target as possible. Things go awry, however, and the pair are separated before completing the task at hand, raising questions about their willingness and ability to see it through to the end. Condemned by some Israelis and westerners as being insufficiently critical of suicide bombers and by some Palestinians as being insufficiently deferential to them, Paradise Now is a brave and powerful attempt to understand and explain the phenomenon.
11:45 AM Turner Classic Movies
Lola Montes (1954 FRA): TCM continues its periodic exploration of Max Ophuls' filmography with Lola Montes, the director's salute to ‘the most scandalous woman in the world'. Born in Ireland in 1821, Montes was a dancer who later became the courtesan of King Ludwig I of Bavaria before succumbing to pneumonia at ago 40 whilst living in New York. The film is set during her time in Central Europe and was, at the time, the most expensive movie ever produced in France. It's not a particular favorite of mine - Martine Carol is pretty awful in the lead role - but is very rarely seen on American television, and features plenty of the visual opulence we associate with Ophuls.