This Weekend, Watch This
A comparison of the new releases for Nov. 20th, 2009
By Curt David
November 20, 2009
BoxOfficeProphets.com
More likely than not, each weekend there is a movie that you have never heard of in the theaters. I'll save you the hassle of researching every movie, by comparing the new releases for each weekend in this column. Then, I'll tell you which movie to watch.
For the weekend of November 20th, the movies opening in wide release are: The Blind Side, Planet 51, and The Twilight Saga: New Moon.
| The Blind Side | Planet 51 | The Twilight Saga: New Moon | Winner (1 point per category) | |
| Clearest Title | Perhaps a thriller about driving in people's blindspots? "Someone is following us!" "But I can't see anyone in the rearview mirror!" | Perhaps a cartoon about the lives of a bunch of planets. "Where is Planet 51? I think he ate all of my MARShmallows!" | Perhaps a movie based on the second Twilight novel. "I think I love you, Mr. Vampire with disheveled hair. But I also have feelings for a werewolf!"* | New Moon has the clearest title and the point. |
| Best Genre & Rating | Sports Drama PG-13 | Sci-Fi Animation PG | Fantasy Drama PG-13 | Fantasy Drama PG-13 Hmmmm? Sports dramas aren't the most frequent things. Blind Side gets a point. |
| Best Tagline | Based on the extraordinary true story | Something strange is coming to their planet...us! | The next chapter begins. | Only one of these sentences isn't boring as all get out. Point for Planet 51. |
| Best Part of Trailer | Sandra Bullock looks incredible! As an actress. And as a woman. | Cute concept about aliens afraid of human invaders. Surprisingly humorous. | Shoot. The official trailer looks better then the commercials. Well played, Twilight folks. | I'm not officially admitting this, but the winning trailer may or may not have brought a tear to my eye. I also may have watched it a second time. Point for The Blind Side. |
| Lead Actor | Sandra Bullock, from Speed, is allergic to horses. | Dwayne Johnson, aka The Rock from the WWE, is of African-Canadian and Samoan descent. | Kristen Stewart (from Panic Room, Into the Wild, and Twilight) has a cat named Jella. | Not because I'm lazy, but because I really like all three performers...each movie gets 1/3 of a point. |
| Best Cast Member | The Southern accent of Tim McGraw. | The British accent of John Cleese. | The abs of Taylor Lautner and Robert Pattinson. | I think watching New Moon will give me a poor self-image complex. Tim's pretty cool, but John Cleese gets the point. |
| Best Street Cred for the Production | This movie is based on Michael Oher, now a Baltimore Ravens football player. | Joe Stillman has also written the little-known movies Shrek and Shrek2. | Stephenie Meyer is the writer of the little-known novel Twilight. | Michael Oher easily gets the point for the coolest person. |
*I'm sorry if that Twilight quote was plagarized from the book or the movie. I have honestly never read any of the books or seen either of the movies....that's just my guess at the plot.
So out of a maximum of 7 points per movie, The Blind Side scores 3 1/3 points, Planet 51 scores 2 1/3 points, and New Moon scores 1 1/3 points.
You may interpret this column for your own movie preferences. For example, if the words "New Moon" sound like your type of movie, go for it. However, if you are still on the fence, please read the following conclusions from the scientific data gathered in this column.
Conclusion 1: On paper, The Blind Side is the movie to watch this weekend.
Conclusion 2: This is my eighth consecutive column. I have written about the past 22 movies to be released into theaters. Up until now, researching a movie has not led me to actually buy a movie ticket. However, this weekend I will be watching The Blind Side.
Conclusion 3: I'm also not officially admitting this, but I may or may not like the romantic comedies Miss Congeniality and While You Were Sleeping.