Top Chef Las Vegas Recap
By Jason Lee
September 19, 2009
BoxOfficeProphets.com
When we were last in the Top Chef kitchen, we watched as Jesse went home after a botched Quickfire amuse-bouche and Hector for truly botching his beef dish. The brothers Bryan and Michael have clearly established themselves as the front-runners, with Jen, Kevin and Pompous Mike running close behind. We have a bunch of women who are only notable for their lack of impact in this competition.
Except for Ashley, that is. She's clearly been one of the more out-spoken women on the show, which has bothered quite a number of BOPers, though I haven't found her quite as annoying. At the opening of the show, Ashley is lamenting the fact that she misses her family. Her brother just had a baby and she wishes that she could be there for them. I don't see this as good news for her, because anytime a cheftestant gets distracted by thoughts of their family, they inevitably fall behind. The only family-oriented person that I can recall that made it to the finale was Antonia in Season 4, and she got eliminated shortly after landing in Puerto Rico.
In any case, the cheftestants head over to the kitchen and before them they see chef and owner Tim Love, who lost to Hubert Keller in the opening episode of Top Chef: Masters. Clearly he knows what the chefs will be experiencing in this Quickfire Challenge.
And what a challenge it will be. Apparently, last week, while I was TiVoing through the commercials, Top Chef fans had the opportunity to vote on the ingredient that the chefs would be working with, choosing between snake, cactus and kangaroo. Had I known about this fan-participation stunt, I definitely would NOT have voted for kangaroo (aren't they endangered somewhere?). I've eaten cactus at the infamous Pink Taco restaurant in LA and it was okay. I guess I would have come down on the side of snake because frankly, I don't like snakes and the fewer of them around, the better.
(Now before you bombard BOP with comments about how snakes keep desert ecosystems in tact, yada yada yada, I'm fully aware. I love snakes and I love what they do for me. I just don't want them nearby.)
Well, looks like 57% of viewers want to see the chefs cook cactus and that's what we're going to get. There are very few chefs that have actual experience with cooking cactus - only Pompous Mike and Ash, in fact. Pompous Mike knows that cacti are slimy so he cures it like salmon. Ash is trying to do a mexican preparation with it but he's hindered by the lack of a tortilla press in the kitchen (come to think of it, I don't recall any other contestant ever needing a tortilla press on Top Chef).
Forty-five minutes are up and the dishes get presented. Laurine does a cactus salsa with achiote pork chop - it looks great. Kevin does a pork tenderloin with cactus marmalade - Tim finds it slimey. Ashley has made cactus jelly donuts but they are too sweet for Tim. We have three ceviches: Pompous Mike with a a cactus tuna ceviche, Bryan with a halibut and cactus ceviche, and his brother Michael with an avocado roll and cactus/coconut ceviche.
Ron has worked the cactus into his swordfish sauce but Padma can't find a trace of it. Ash is doing a play off of a grilled cheese sandwich, with cactus in between two hefty tortillas that have come together to look like a big, auburn turd. Jennifer has a warm chorizo and cactus salad while our Frenchie, Mattin, has breaded cactus and halibut.
On the bottom are Ash, whose tortilla was thick and dry, Michael, whose flavors were like "trains colliding," and Ron, whose fish was overcooked and tasted rancid. Wow, the chefs at the bottom were all men. Maybe the women are finally finding their footing.
On the top, we have Laurine with some great flavors, Pompous Mike as the only chef who correctly prepared cactus, and Mattin who ingeniously used tequila in his dish and was one of only two who actually showcased the cactus. I'm thinking that Pompous Mike wins for having the only correct preparation and...I'm right. Pompous Mike takes it home (plus $15,000) and is ecstatic that he's shown the other chefs that he's a force to be reckoned with. I'm sorry, but if it took you five episodes to demonstrate that, then you're not as big a force as you think.
Padma moves onto the Elimination Challenge: they will have to prepare a high-end lunch (emphasis on "high-end") for chef Tim Love, our guest judge, plus two dozen cowboys at his Las Vegas ranch. They can cook any dish they want, as long as it's high-end. And what's the catch? They won't know what they're cooking with until they get there, and they'll only have one hour and 15 minutes to actually cook.
Ouch. They'll be shopping and planning blind. I love these types of challenges. The best was the surfer challenge from Season 2. Haven't seen it? Go find it online somewhere - it's a GREAT episode.
Anyways, the chefs head to Whole Foods to shop and they are all being pretty conservative. They know from past seasons not to expect anything more than a grill and maybe someplace to boil water. We see a LOT of chefs buying fish but thankfully, no scallops. Meanwhile, Jennifer is storming around the produce aisles. She finds the whole situation frustrating. She wants to know where they're cooking and what the conditions are. She's such a control freak. I totally have a crush on her.
The chefs head back into their vans and drive out to the ranch. When they get there, everyone's jaws hit the floor of the car as they see nothing but some open fires and tents. Yep, they'll be camping it out tonight. I love it.
They explore and to their dismay, they only see some cast irons, some crappy plates and a chuck wagon. I'm not even sure I see a fridge, though there must be some someplace because the fish doesn't go bad overnight.
Ashley, Laurine and Robin are all ecstatic. They were raised to love the great outdoors and they feel right at home. Meanwhile, the men all turn into big babies. Eli, always the smart-ass, complains non-stop through the night to both his fellow chefs and to the cameras. I'm sick of him. Michael says that the whole ranch area looks like a scene from a horror movie. Meanwhile, I smirk, noticing that his face in the interview is totally sunburnt. Ron dismantles a tree and arranges the branches in a voodoo ritual that he claims will keep the snakes away.
Morning dawns and before we know it, the clock hits 10 a.m. The chefs all immediately jump to work, knowing that they have a scant 75 minutes to get their dishes ready. As if the three ceviches in the Quickfire weren't enough, Mattin and Ron have both decided to make ceviches in the desert. Mattin is pleased that his ceviche dish won't require him to actually cook anything, but I remember how that tactic spelled doom for Sam in the Season 2 finale.
By the way, the male chefs are still complaining about the heat and the conditions. I yell at the TV, in Tom Colicchio fashion, "It's called Top CHEF, not Top WHINER!"
Time runs down and like a mirage, the judges appear. Padma rings the meal bell and lunch is served. The cowboys head down, hungry to eat some good food.
The chefs are cooking in four teams of three. First up, we have Pompous Mike with a spin on pork gyro and an apple, fennel tzatziki. Tim says that the meat is cooked well but that it lacks pizzazz. Cowgirl Laurine has a sauteed arctic char with tomatillo salsa and to me, it looks like the only truly southwestern dish of the entire group. She also did a baked potato on a grill, which is a huge accomplishment. Tim Love adores the taste of the grill Laurine incorporated and Gail says that it's flavorful. Lastly, we have smart-ass Eli with a tuna sandwich. Gail says that it's a strange dish for a ranch and Padma wants more flavor.
Next we have Ash with a grilled chicken paillard with corn succotash. Tom calls it sensible but Gail thinks that there's too much bacon grease in it. Mattin has a ceviche three ways: salmon with apple, spicy tuna and corn with cod. Readers of my recaps will know that he has violated the rule of "do one thing and do it well," and indeed, the cod in his ceviche is disgusting. Tom Colicchio actually gets up from the table, walks away and spits it onto the Las Vegas sand. Robin, also in their group, has major problems as well. She has done a grilled romaine salad with "drunken" prawns and her prawns are disgusting. Tom Love says that it tastes like he sucked on chlorine.
Looks like Laurine is the only hit so far.
Next we have Bryan, Jennifer and Ashley. I notice that Bryan and Jenn always cook together if they can help it. I appreciate that. I really admire both of them and would like to see them get married. They would have talented, beautiful children.
Anyhow, Bryan has a roasted pork loin with dandelion greens and polenta. Tom thinks that it's perfectly cooked and Gail says that she would feel comfortable camping with Bryan. Jennifer has snapper with duck confit plus a salad of dikon and carrot. Again, it's perfectly cooked according to Tom and Gail found it to be thoughtful and different. Ashley wanted to play with the flavors in a club sandwich, making a seared halibut and avocado mousse. A mousse sounds like a strange component for a hot Vegas lunch but the judges find it flavorful. Everything tastes good and the consensus is that this is the best dish that Ashley has made on the show.
In the last group, we have Ron who has made a coconut mango and lime ceviche, which is a little sweet, and a Haitian mojito, which is roundly criticized as disgusting. Kevin has a roasted duck breast with mole and tequila watermelon, which is perfectly cooked. Michael has a dashi with miso and a mirin-cured black cod. This sort of high-class food seems way out of place at a ranch but the judges love the dish. I guess good food is good food, no matter where it's served.
Clearly, the bottom two will include spit-out-the-food Mattin and chlorine-prawn Robin but I'm not sure who else. I'm thinking that Bryan and Michael will make it in the top for the third time, but I'm also hoping that Laurine sneaks in there, too.
In the stew room, Padma asks for Laurine, Ashley, Michael and Bryan. Wow, four chefs in the top. I'm excited that my three made it in but slightly surprised that Ashley beat out Jennifer.
The judges are quick to explain why these four were in the top. Ashley had a tricky job of cooking her halibut over the flame but did well and it was her best dish to date. Bryan made a restaurant-quality dish that felt perfect for eating outdoors. Laurine excelled at the way that she incorporated the flavors of the grill and the simplicity of the dish made it shine. Michael brought some flavors that were unexpected but worked together perfectly.
I'm hoping that Laurine, with her truly outdoors-y dish, will win but it's BRYAN who takes home a third Elimination win. Over five seasons, only seven chefs have ever amassed three or more Elimination wins and none have done so this early in the game. It took Bryan five episodes to win three Eliminations. The chef that comes closest to that feat was Tre in Season 3, who won three Eliminations by the eighth episode.
On the bottom, as expected, are Robin, Mattin and Ron. Robin knows exactly why she's there. She starts describing the thought process that went into the dish and Tim Love stops her to remark that it doesn't sounds like she's describing the dish that they ate. Gail says that the shrimp was not good, almost to the point where they were scared to eat it. Tom says that there was a good dish among those ingredients, she just couldn't make it.
While Robin totally expected to be in the bottom, Mattin is totally surprised. Uh oh. That's the second rule he's broken. The last thing you want to do is profess that you actually thought that your dish tasted good when the judges found it disgusting, because then the judges will think that you have no right to even be in the competition.
But alas, that's what he does. He says that he was happy with the dish and is stunned that he's in the bottom.
"Did you taste the ceviche?" Tom asks. Mattin says he did. "Some cod was raw and some was cooked," Tom points out. "It was a poorly put together dish." Tim Love chimes in with the fact that eating Mattin's food made him feel physically sick.
Lastly, Ron had a pretty good ceviche, though it was a little sweet, but his mojito was disgusting. Ron tries to make the excuse that he doesn't drink and didn't want the coconut juice to go to waste. Gail calls it "Really, really bad. Bitter and acidic."
It's not even a question in my mind as to which chef goes home. The most egregious mistake made in this challenge was not made during cooking, but was made by Mattin as he stood up for his ceviche, saying that he thought it was a strong dish. Gail said that Robin's dish was a soggy mess and that her shrimp had a strange sourness. Tom and Tim knock Ron's drink, but almost every judge was outraged that Mattin actually thought he put out good food. Gail found it shocking that he was so clueless as to what he did wrong. Tom thought that the dish was way out of his capabilities. Tim Love had a big problem that Mattin thought that it tasted good.
And yes, Mattin is going home. Mattin has been one of the bubbliest competitors on the show to date and the fact that he's getting sent home doesn't seem to dampen his spirits. He's still smiling and still happy. Robin, on the other hand, looks completely defeated. I think she knows that she put out a horrible dish and feels bad that someone else is going home instead of her. Well, there's nothing to do but to put your cowboy hat back on and gear up for next week's challenge.