Trailer Hitch
By Eric Hughes
September 16, 2009
BoxOfficeProphets.com

Well, at least he doesn't have goofy hair.

Welcome to Trailer Hitch, BOP's look at the latest movie trailers to hit the Internet. This week: Willem Dafoe enters Eden, a college girl chooses the wrong house to babysit at and Bella and Edward do the long distance thing.

Black Dynamite – Opens October 16th

Here's something refreshing: a spoof movie not from the Scary Movie camp. I'm referring to Black Dynamite, a parody of blaxploitation films of the 1970s. But don't go around thinking this is the next Undercover Brother. (It doesn't have that mainstream feel to it). Though well received, the 2002 Eddie Griffin-starrer looked more like Austin Powers in blackface than anything else. Black Dynamite, on the other hand, appears to stay truer to its source material.

Picked up in August by new shingle Apparition from Sony Worldwide Acquisitions, Black Dynamite stars Michael Jai White as the title character, a former CIA agent called back into work after finding out that the Italian mob killed his brother, among other troubles. He soon discovers he's in the middle of a conspiracy, which leads all the way to the White House. Supporting cast includes Arsenio Hall, Tommy Davidson and Nicole Sullivan.

Grade: B-

Antichrist – Opens October 23rd

With just two characters, Antichrist is as about as sparse a film as films get. In it, Willem Dafoe and Charlotte Gainsbourg retreat to the woods – named Eden – following the death of their baby. There, they come into contact with gruesome happenings.
The flick, dubbed "the most shocking film in the history of the Cannes Film Festival" by The Sunday Telegraph, was an official selection at a number of film festivals and seems to come highly touted – at least from critics from its native Denmark. Even so, the preview available for viewing now is a bit of a yawner. I couldn't get that interested because I was never really aware of what the studio was trying to sell me. I'll blame the marketing department if I end up missing out on something good.

Grade: D+

The House of the Devil – Opens October 30th in theaters; VOD on October 1st

If you heard a new horror movie was coming out that centers on a young, hot college student who's in for the ride of her life after accepting a babysitting job at a remote mansion, I'm almost certain – unless you've never seen a single horror movie ever – you'd give up on the project before even finishing the movie's plot outline. A word to the wise: Don't skip over The House of the Devil.

It's not, at least from what I can tell from the trailer, some cheap, glamorous thriller. (It's not even Hollywood; two indies – Dark Sky Films and Glass Eye Pix – are responsible). And if cultish, '80s-era horror chillers are your bag, then there's a good chance The House of the Devil is your movie.

The look of the movie is fantastic. Colors are muted, the imagery is disturbing and what actually goes on in that house over the course of a single night is not quite known. All we're given is Samantha (Jocelin Donahue), the babysitter, really needs the money, and it also so happens to be the same night as a lunar eclipse. Cut to flashes of otherworldly faces and pentagrams drawn with blood, and you've got yourself a good time.

Grade: B+

A Christmas Carol – Opens November 6th

Performance capture is creepy. We've seen Robert Zemeckis use it before in The Polar Express and Beowulf. He's at it again in A Christmas Carol, perhaps one of the most retold, repackaged, rebranded, resold, re-whatever-you-want-to-call-it stories of all time. Perhaps that's why performance capture comes into play, so that we can see A Christmas Carol "like never before" (as the trailer promises).

As for the movie itself, I really don't know what to make of it. All Disney does with you for two-and-a-half minutes is take you on a flight lesson with an animated Jim Carrey. He's flying around town, rocketing up to the room, falling back down the earth – what the hang is going on here? With a story like A Christmas Carol, you can kind of get away with showing off other aspects of the movie because its plotline is so deeply ingrained within our consciousness.

Yet Jim Carrey – or a version of him – literally flies around for the duration of the feature trailer, screaming at unsuspecting ghosts, crashing into hardwood floors. It's probably an effort on Disney's part to show off what you'll get to see in 3-D (and/or in IMAX if you so choose). But either way, it's a bit ridiculous.

Grade: D

The Twilight Saga: New Moon – Opens November 20th

New Moon, the next chapter in Summit Entertainment's hugely successful Twilight Saga series, acts just like your typical Hollywood sequel: it's bigger. Bigger action, bigger playing field, bigger Taylor Lautner biceps. (Seriously, the boy packed on about 30 pounds to keep up with his character's growth spurt in Stephenie Meyer's book). The story, as I remember reading a few summers ago, is also much more cinematic, complete with action sequences, motorcycle rides and a trip to Italy. Its transformation from book to screen should be rather "effortless."

However, it's difficult for me to get excited over New Moon when I detested the book. Detested may be too strong a word. But it's true that it was my least favorite of the four novels that make up the teeny bopper Twilight Saga. Even worse, it lessened my enthusiasm for the series so much so that I nearly vacated the series at book two. Nothing seemed to happen. It was all rather monotonous.

But since this is a column that's expected to judge a movie by its trailer, I must admit it's exciting to see some new blood in the cast. Especially Dakota Fanning, who should make a perfect Jane. You can totally see her torturing people with her mind, right?

I should say, however, that the series would benefit by not taking itself so damn seriously. There's a lot of overacting going on here, and likely more melodrama than we were treated to the first time around. If the Twilight Saga stole even a touch of the campiness that Alan Ball has all but perfected with True Blood, the series would have a greater respect from those not familiar with the books.

In this less than gripping chapter, Bella faces new sexual temptation in beefier Jacob Black after her vampire lover, Edward, abruptly departs Forks. Her loyalties are tested, though, when the old feud between vampires (which Edward is) and werewolves (which Jacob is) reignites.

Grade: C