Monday Morning Quarterback Part II
By BOP Staff
January 13, 2009
BoxOfficeProphets.com

He's wearing his Arizona Cardinals watch!

Everybody loves a bride. Except us.

Kim Hollis: Bride Wars, the women-go-nuts-for-weddings comedy from Fox, opened to $21.1 million. How good a result is this?

Brandon Scott: I think that this is disappointing. Torino steals the headlines and Bride dukes it out for a tight finish for second with Unborn. With two known, name actresses, I think they were clearly expecting more.

Daron Aldridge: It would be a respectable, laudable gross if not for the performances of Gran Torino and The Unborn, both of which were the weekend's surprises. The take is actually a better take than I would have thought but the studio probably wanted more. I have to reiterate my opinion about Hudson from the discussion about My Best Friend's Girl just a few months ago. I really don't see her as a draw with more mediocre returns than breakout hits. Hathaway's big hits have at least been more recent than Hudson's.

Max Braden: Last year 27 Dresses opened the weekend after this one to $23 million on fewer theaters, so this a decline. But Gran Torino opened surprisingly high. January releases for romantic comedies shouldn't be expected to do much more than low 20s.

Jim Van Nest: I agree with Max on the Rom-Com thing. And I'll add that while Hudson and Hathaway are "known actresses", how many people will go to see a movie just because they're in it? There's a handful of actresses who have that going for them and neither of these two qualify, in my opinion. AND, they were going up against an incredible "I'll see it because he's in it" film in Gran Torino. So, I'd say they should take their $21 millionand be happy Torino wasn't in 3,500 theaters.

Kevin Chen: If this discussion were not overshadowed by the context of the current economic crisis, I would have taken your assertion that these films are competing for audience and laughed you off the island. Instead, I'll merely suggest that you are barking mad.

Jason Lee: I think that even if Gran Torino hadn't opened above Bride Wars, we still would have been a little disappointed with the gross given the star-power and the brain-dead enjoyment factor of this film. I mean, c'mon, who thought that Bride Wars would have been a mere $1.3 million ahead of The Unborn?

David Mumpower: You know, I dig Hathaway and I'll always treasure Kate Hudson for Almost Famous, but Bride Wars offends me more than any other movie in recent memory in concept. It's an insult to vaginas everywhere and I'm more than a little bit disgusted it did $21.1 million. That's three million worth of suckers who could have stayed home and watched a good chick flick instead.

Reagen Sulewski: I share your horror at all involved, but at some point don't we have to blame the women that keep subsidizing this dreck? Quit paying to be insulted, or at least hire me to do it cheaper.


Creepy kids sell.

Kim Hollis: The Unborn, the horror flick from Universal, opened to $19.8 million in only 2,357 locations, a solid per-venue average of $8,405. How did the studio manage such a strong result?

Brandon Scott: It can thank the creepy imagery in the trailers and a great poster. Did anyone see that poster? I mean, if that derriere doesn't sell tickets, what will?

Daron Aldridge: It's hard to say because there was no buzz that made this stand out. Previous January releases The Hitcher in 2007 and One Missed Call in 2008 combined earned less than The Unborn. Hostel had momentum in 2006, but also earned less than The Unborn's debut. Therefore, I say this result is great.

Max Braden: I don't remember it advertised on David Goyer's name, but he's the writer of the Blade and revamped Batman series. I think it's a project that begs in a "you know it when you see it" kind of way.

Eric Hughes: I'm not entirely sure what went right for the Universal release. All I know is I took one look at the trailer and thought, "uh...good pick, Gary Oldman." If the demos skewed young, perhaps a good chunk of the college crowd back on campuses this weekend wanted a good scare with their friends. And it's a good thing The Unborn already made some money - My Bloody Valentine comes out this Friday.

Tony Kollath: Odette Yustman *owns* January!

Jason Lee: I thought Reagen nailed it in his Weekend Forecast, the producers of this film just ticked off all the elements that they needed for a successful horror film.

Creepy kid? Check
Frightened hot girl? Check
Bizzarro monster that slithers up stairs in a scary way? Check

I think it's time to call Morris Chestnut a draw. No? Just me?

Kim Hollis: Not Easily Broken, the latest empowering T.D. Jakes adaptation from Sony/Screen Gems, earned $5.3 million in only 724 locations. Between this movie and Woman Thou Art Loosed, is T.D. Jakes poised to be the next Tyler Perry?

Brandon Scott: I think Jakes gained some publicity for his comments surrounding Obama's presidential nomination. I don't see him as the new Madea.

Daron Aldridge: The $10 million or so difference between their films' openings are something that keeps me from declaring a new Madea is in town.

Max Braden: I'd credit the box office to Morris Chestnut and Taraji Henson, but it certainly helps T.D. Jakes get his next sale. I hadn't realized this until I checked the credits, but director Bill Duke was the badass back in Predator and Commando, among others.

Jason Lee: I can see it now . . . "Coming, Fall 2009, the all-new, smash hit from Tyler Perry: 'Madea Lays The Smack Down on the New Madea In Town!'"

David Mumpower: I don't see Jakes as the next Tyler Perry and it's probably a bit of lazy lateral thinking on our part to even equate the two. Perry's movies are probably intended to be inspirational in tone, but they certainly do not have the same level of commitment to spirituality and redemption that Jakes' stories do. Perry's audience is wider for his movies and he has the box office to show for that, but T.D. Jakes is much more famous on the whole. Since Hollywood is just a side gig for him, that's probably what matters the most to him.

Daron Aldridge: Very true, David. Similar to the question about what is more satisfying to Eastwood, Hollywood probably isn't Jakes' focus.