Trailer Hitch
By Eric Hughes
December 24, 2008
BoxOfficeProphets.com

I totally was not surfing for porn. Why do you ask?

Welcome to Trailer Hitch, BOP's look at the latest movie trailers to hit the Internet. This week: Paul Rudd finds true (man) love, Beyoncé and Ali Larter get in on and Ben Stiller talks to things in a museum.

Confessions of a Shopaholic – Opens February 13th

Based on the best-selling chick lit novels by Brit Sophie Kinsella, Confessions of a Shopaholic, as its name implies, reveals the number one thing that nearly all women can agree upon is quite awesome: shopping. No really, no one knows this. (Just ask YouTube sensation Kelly from the Shoes video).

The movie adaptation, which uses material from the first two novels in the Shopaholic series, is about a college grad named Rebeca Bloomwood (Isla Fisher) who'd rather peer in storefronts and purchase handbags over just about anything this fine world has to offer. Things change, however, when the girl finds herself head over heels in debt, even though she regularly pens a popular column about how best to control spending for a financial publication.

If this one's lucrative, you can expect a franchise from Touchtone. There are three more books in the series.

Grade: C
Also expected to be released on this date: The International; They Came From Upstairs; Friday the 13th; Miss February; Under the Sea 3-D; New York, I Love You; Gomorrah; Two Lovers

Race to Witch Mountain – Opens March 13th

Looks like we've got another loser of an alien movie on our hands. Last time it was The X-Files: I Want to Believe. Now we've got Race to Witch Mountain, based on a 1968 book, Escape to Witch Mountain, and its 1975 movie adaptation of the same name. In the upgrade, Dwayne Johnson (who more or less has finally dropped "The Rock" from his name) stars as a Las Vegas cab driver who must safely return two kid aliens (AnnaSophia Robb and Alexander Ludwig) back to their spaceship in Witch Mountain or face a bevy of consequences by the hands of a villainous bounty hunter (Ciarán Hinds).

The Disney flick of course is aimed at tweens. But even so, the jokes are pretty lame. Methinks Dwayne should stick to his adult action movies.

Grade: D
Also expected to be released on this date: The Soloist, A Perfect Getaway, The Horsemen, 12 Rounds, Sunshine Cleaning

I Love You, Man – Opens March 20th

Paul Rudd and Jason Segel work well together. We previously saw the duo onscreen in a smaller capacity for Knocked Up and Forgetting Sarah Marshall. Now the comedians stand front and center in I Love You, Man, written and directed by John Hamburg (Along Came Polly). Here, Rudd's character, Greg Moton, is set to marry Shandi Dawson (Rashida Jones). But first Greg must venture out on a number of "man dates" to nail down the perfect best man, because growing up he never personally knew any men very well. That's where Dave Negal (Segel) comes into play.

I have to say this one works. It looks like it could be a pretty good movie, considering the number of times I paused to laugh at the trailer's punch lines (Greg's male kiss reaction, the open house farter). Even small bits of dialogue – "you wanna get a corndog? – had me chuckling. Other cast members include Jaime Pressly, Andy Samberg, J.K. Simmons and Jon Favreau.

Grade: A-
Also expected to be released on this date: Duplicity, Knowing

Obsessed – Opens April 24th

Remember when Uma Thurman butted heads with Darryl Hannah in Kill Bill: Volume 2? Remember how awesome it was? I'm not here to suggest a Beyoncé Knowles/Ali Larter boxing match will prove to be just as good. But really, when does anyone turn down a catfight?

Obsessed, from Steve Shill (The Tudors, Dexter), pits the two women against one another in a thriller shot earlier this summer. In it, Larter stars as Lisa Sheridan, an office temp who gets dangerously close to a married man, Derek Charles (Idris Elba), which draws the attention of his family, including wife Sharon (Beyoncé).

When I first heard of the project, my expectations weren't so high. Though it must be said, this one doesn't look half bad. Beyoncé is really making a name for herself as an actress – Dreamgirls, Cadillac Records, an SNL skit from a few weeks ago – even though most men would rather just see her shake her tail on MTV.

Grade: B
Also expected to be released on this date: Fighting, The Goods: The Don Ready Story, Whiteout, Vanilla Gorilla

Night at the Museum 2: Battle of the Smithsonian – Opens May 22nd

Sorry, kids. Night at the Museum 2 looks just as unnecessary as I expected it to once I learned 20th Century Fox decided to turn their surprise big money earner into a franchise. Like Pink Panther 2 unnecessary. And this is coming from someone who more or less enjoyed the original.

The sequel is basically nothing more than Ben Stiller running around a museum, with friends in tow of course. Some are old – Robin Williams, Owen Wilson, Ricky Gervais. And some are new – Amy Adams, Hank Azaria, Bill Hader. What else do you need to know? I'd actually prefer seeing Confessions of a Shopaholic over this one.

Grade: D+
Also expected to be released on this date: Terminator Salvation: The Future Begins