Survivor Gabon: Earth's Last Eden
This Camp is Cursed
By Jim Van Nest, Survivor Analyst
October 22, 2008

We know this isn't GC, but we had to use this picture. Look at that freakin' Skeletor!

Hello, good people, and welcome to a horribly late edition of Survivor: Gabon. Sure, I'm late as hell, but think of it this'll have two recaps from me in a teeny little 72 hour span, and that's always a good thing. Anyway, how 'bout getting to what we came for. Previously on Survivor: the tribes were asked to rank their members, which led to the schoolyard pick 'em for new tribes. When all was said and done, Ace, Kelly and Jacque were sent to purgatory, aka Fang, and Sugar went away to Exile Island to await a challenge, Tribal and vote to see what tribe she would return to. Despite the new look tribes; the result was the same as Randy helped his new Kota teammates skunk Fang in a little water-lacrosse-bumper boat game. With yet another trip to Tribal in the works, the Fang tribe had to decide between the hard-working challenge powerhouse Jacque and the lazy, absolutely challenge-useless and monumentally stupid, Kelly. Needless to say, Jacque was sent packing and the Fang tribe took one more step toward extinction. Which Fang member will be voted out tonight?

We begin at Fang after Tribal Council and Ace is feeling out there with his girl gone. He thinks they were afraid of his alliance with Jacque. Of course, he has a much tighter alliance with Sugar and she has the idol. Enter Sugar and she's totally bummed to see Kelly instead of Jacque. Talk turns to how Exile Island was. She says it was good this time because she stayed in the Sugar Shack this time. Are you freaking kidding me? Why not just come back to camp with the idol around your neck? When you come back from Exile and tell them you didn't look for the idol it's for one of two reasons: because you're amazingly lazy, or because you already have the idol. Way to go Sugar! No one was thinking much of you, but now you're big and bold on EVERYone's radar. To emphasize the point, Crystal tells us she'll be keeping an eye on her. Cue the sun...

We come back from the credits to check in with the Kota tribe. Bob is fishing and brings in an impressive haul. And while this next segment is pretty interesting, it shows how boring life is for the dominating tribe. One of the fish Bob brings in is apparently electric. So after Bob got the charge, everyone took turns shocking themselves. It was like live action Beavis and Butthead. Speaking of Beavis, Randy is telling up how great the new Kota tribe is and how well they were welcomed. He says that he expects them to vote the Fang members out first, but he'll do his best to adapt.

Back over at Fang we have one of the coolest moments ever films on Survivor, in my opinion. And I guarantee my retelling of it will not do it justice. As Matty is out in the jungle, he stumbles on a couple of elephants right across a small stream from them. As the elephant tears down some smaller trees, Matty and Ace decide to hop in the boat for a closer look. While we've all seen elephants at the zoo, I can't imagine the rush I would have coming that close to a wild elephant. "It's magnificent!" Indeed it is, Matty, indeed it is. He tells how much an encounter like this makes him appreciate where he is. And with that...

Probst sighting!! As Kota gets a look at the Fang tribe minus Jacque, Marcus quickly whispers "focus on the challenge, we'll talk about it later" to Charlie and Corinne. Jeff asks them about the surprise of Jacque being gone and Marcus mentions that it's definitely a surprise considering how she performed in the challenge. Speaking of the challenge, let's get to this one. Each tribe will have a bin of fruit. One member will have to throw it to another member; meanwhile, an opposing person will have a bat and be trying to knock the fruit out of the air. They'll have to go through two portions like this with two batsmen. Once through both parts, the fruit (if it has not hit the ground) will be put in a basket. The tribe with the most fruit (determined by weight) will win the challenge. Wanna know what they're playing for? They're playing for an herb garden and some oils for cooking. Also, the winning tribe will get to keep their fruit. Let's get to it.

Swinging the bat for Fang will be Crystal and Ace. For Kota, Bob and Charlie. As the challenge begins, the Kota tribe has no trouble getting by Crystal, but Ace rejects everything they toss. The Fang tribe is flying through the course and Charlie can't hit anything. Finally, Marcus suggests to his team that they throw more than one piece at the same time. As Ace knocks one out of the sky, the other piece gets through to Randy. Fang is steadily getting fruit in their basket while Kota starts going for the heavier fruit like watermelons and pineapple. Once both teams figured it out, it's hard to say who will actually win this one. As time expires, Jeff begins to weigh the fruit and he starts with Fang. They collected 16 pounds of fruit. Next up is Kota and with the final two pineapples, they top out at 18 pounds and Kota wins reward. Seriously though, was there ever a doubt? Last thing is for Kota to send someone to Exile. Dan turns around and says they should just start sending her mail there and they send Sugar back again. When asked why, Dan jokes, "Comedy." But he comes back to say he figures that if she keeps going, her tribe will force her to play the idol sometime before the merge and they like the idea of having the idol out of play.

We come back from break to the Kota tribe. Charlie tells us he feels bad for the Fang tribe. Dan speaks up to the tribe to about how he wants this Kota tribe to stick together. And that they'll all need to stay together after the merge. Marcus agrees that the next challenge is an important one. He then tells us that it's hard to believe Dan when he talks about his need to give his complete devotion to Kota. He also says that Susie is just the opposite and is harder to read. As the tribe feasts on fresh fruit, Randy tells us that he once again kicked butt in the challenge and that his plan is to stay quiet and be helpful to the tribe. He also tells us that he plans on sticking with the Kota yellow until the end.

Out on Exile, Sugar is pleased as punch to be there. She is absolutely loving life out on Exile. She's eating and sleeping well. Swimming and having a blast. She mentions that she has the idol, so she'd have to be real dumb to get sent home next. DOH!!!

Back at Fang, it seems there's an argument brewing between Crystal and GC over eating rice. She tells him to eat his rice and he tells her not to tell him to do nothing. For real? We're really gonna have THIS kind of obnoxiousness? GC then tells us that this game is way harder than he ever expected and that having to deal with the people is the worst. As the tribe discusses GC's implosion, Ace tells us that he's sitting back enjoying the show. As Crystal tries to make nice with GC, he tells us that he feels like this game is changing him and he can't wait to get back home. Oh we have yet ANOTHER quitter in our midst?

We come back from break to Fang receiving tree mail. The mail comes with a little stick ball and they all seem to think they'll be in the ball. But that plays second fiddle to the newest Fang crisis. Where the hell is GC? It's time to leave for a challenge and GC is no where to be found. He took off in the tribe boat and they can't find him anywhere. They're told that they have less than five minutes to find him or they'll have to leave without him. As Ken, Kelly and Matty are trying to scream for him, Crystal and Ace think it's a waste of time and energy and they should just let him go. And as much as I would have loved to see him AWOL for the challenge, Chucklenut shows up just in time to leave.

Probst sighting!! Today's challenge is a simple one. Each tribe will have five balls to throw down a huge grassy Plinko board. At the end of the course are gates with different point values. The twist on this is that there will be one member from each tribe on the course to stop the balls as they come down. The bigger twist? They'll be blindfolded. Ace will be defending for Fang with Sugar calling to him. Randy will call to Dan for Kota. Each team will throw five balls. Highest score after that wins. First up are Matty and Charlie. Charlie's yellow ball glides through into the two point bin. Matty hits the five point bin. Susie and GC are up next. Dan stops the red ball while the yellow ball gets past Ace for two points. Sugar and Ace are having trouble with their communication while Randy has Dan playing an awesome game.

Kelly and Marcus are up next. This time, Dan stops his own team's ball, while the Fang ball gets through for two more points. Fang is ahead 7-4. Crystal and Corinne are the next throwers. Randy guides Dan right to the red ball, while Ace bangs his head on Dan's shield and lets the yellow ball through for two more points. So, with one ball to throw, Fang is ahead 7-6. Throwing this time will be Kenny and Bob. In what may be one of he more brilliant challenge performances ever, Randy guides Dan right to the Fang ball and Dan stops it cold. With the Fang ball stopped, Randy then yells, "Freeze Ace, freeze Ace" and Ace stops dead and allows the yellow ball to roll into the two point bin for an 8-7 victory for Kota. Jeff points out there have been five Tribal Councils and Fang has been at four of them.

We come back from break to the dejected Fang tribe. GC tells us about losing and going to Tribal and how much he's not looking forward to it. We then see GC telling Matty to vote him out as he's ready to leave the game. He says he wants to get back to life and focus on what's important. Matty shares the news with Crystal and she's pissed. Like he wants them to beg him to stay. He can just go. She says to just vote him out. She tells Ken about it and lets Ken know that GC can go home for all she cares.

Ken then passes it to Kelly and Ace and Sugar talk about it as well. They think it's fun to watch the tribe eat themselves. As they talk about how to play the idol, Ace asks her where it is. She says it's in her bag. As they go for a swim, Crystal takes it upon herself to go through Sugar's bag and finds the idol. With Matty, Kelly and Ken around, the four of them now have some ill-gotten information and it becomes a question of what to do with it. And if I may, for a second, discuss this whole "going through someone's bag" thing. This is bullshit! I know I say it EVERY time it happens, but this just really pisses me off. I realize this is a game and it's a cutthroat game at that. But shit, is nothing sacred? Can a person not have even one tiny shred of privacy? I SO wish Probst and Burnett would make going through player's belongings a banned activity. I have no respect for ANY player that would sink so low as to go through someone else's shit. So Crystal, screw you. And Matty, Ken and Kelly...screw you too. You should have had the decency to make her stop.

With all that being said...Sugar, darlin' you WANT them to know you have the idol? You damn near confessed to it after Tribal and now you leave your bag out in the open for anyone to look through??? One last point to ponder. If I ever got on this show, my luxury item would be a little wooden totem on a leather strap. I'd come to the island with it in my bag wrapped in a small crappy towel. That way, if I got sent to Exile Island, I could leave the trinket in my bag for everyone to find. While having the idol is a huge advantage, having everyone THINK you have the idol could be just as huge.

Of course, this is the Fang tribe, so we can surely expect them to screw up this information. They all decide that tonight is the time to blind side Sugar. But at the same time, GC has to go. Matty and Kelly, while realizing the impact of the idol, both still feel that it's more important to dump GC.

The first question at Tribal is to Ace about the wear and tear of 15 days in the game. He says that you can see it as people are getting skinnier and belt loops are too loose. GC agrees that it's tough and that it's really hard out there and how much he'd love to be with his family and friends. Sugar spills the beans that GC is ready to go home. He says that he's suffered a lot in life and he thinks he might have suffered enough. Jeff asks Matty if it's tough to hear a teammate want to go home. He says that there is no quitting and that you have to eliminate that as an option.

Jeff turns to Sugar about all her time spent on Exile. He asks her if that's concerning to her. She says that she feels like she could be the one to go. Jeff asks Ken if it's frustrating that Sugar keeps going to Exile. He says that it's very frustrating. Jeff asks Sugar about the idol and she mentions that no one's asked her about it. She says that since it's known that people can go through your bags, she's not too surprised no one has asked her. He asks her if her bag has been gone through and she says she doesn't know. The bag has been out in the open and she's fine with that. Crystal says that it's crazy to leave your bag out like that. Sugar simply says that sometimes it might be just as good for people to know you have the idol. And with that, it's time to vote.

The first vote we see is Sugar's vote for GC. She says she's only voting for him because he wants to go home. GC votes for Kelly saying that he has to vote for someone. Those are the only votes we see, which leads you to believe they're going to go ahead and get rid of GC. Of course, a double-cross on Sugar probably wouldn't be known to GC. Jeff asks if anyone would like to play the idol and after a few seconds, no one does. As it turns out, GC's vote for Kelly was the only vote NOT for GC and GC becomes the fifth person voted out of Survivor: Gabon. This vote was pretty much a no-brainer. Sure, you'd like to get rid of the idol, but the bottom line is you have to get rid of the cancer in your tribe. And GC was the cancer of the Fang tribe. If left out there, he would have festered and gotten worse. With his ouster, the tribe will get along better and will likely perform better in challenges.

Next time on Survivor: Ace forges a pact with Matty and then tries to talk Sugar into giving him the idol. As he tells us that he has "complete supremacy", you almost have to think she actually gives to him. And won't that rank up there with the dumbest moves in Survivor history. But, I'll wait until it actually happens before I rant about it. And with this recap taking so long, I won't have to wait long. Til Thursday, take care!

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